Feeling down

[leishacaz]

I just want to vent a little about my DH.

I'm 14 weeks pregnant and showing quite a bit and it dawned on me this morning how little my DH wants to touch me, kiss me or have intercourse with me and I'm sure its since I've started to show. He's always had an issue with me getting fat. I'm not fat and never have been but in the 8 years we've been together he's always made it known to me that he would not like to have a fat wife as it would be a big turn off for him. I don't like that because I said it wouldn't bother me if he were to get a little chubby- I wouldn't love him any less- and I thought marriage was about loving each other unconditionally.

I'm sure he's the type of person that doesn't find pregnancy attractive at all and god it hurts my feelings. Its hard just being pregnant let alone having a DH that is disgusted to look at me naked. I'm so concious of it that when I get out of the shower I try and keep the towel up till I get my underwear on and then I try and put my clothes on as quickly as possible.

I don't now what to do about it. I now if I confront him about it he'll just say I'm being paranoid and he doesn't find me ugly but actions speak alot louder than words.

If you made it this far... thanks for reading.

[deb1234]

Velisha, i'm so sorry to hear you feel that way. maybe your DH is not sure if it is ok to have sex while you are pregnant or something. maybe you could try letting him know that its ok, rather than waiting for him to make the first move?? :hugs:

[leishacaz]

He knows its very ok especially since its our 2nd child. Thanks for the reply.
He's just got issues...

[M O P]

Velisha you're right- he does have issues :thumbsdown:
You have to tell him how you feel though.
Was he like this with your last pregnancy?

[ETsMum]

:hugs: You poor thing...

I've sent you a PM. I hope it helps. :)

[Livy]

I am sorry you are feeling so down ..... and I hope your DH snaps out of it!!

I would definitely confront him about it though - at least then you can hopefully talk about things.

Good luck :hugs:

[neostudded]

I feel so sorry for you, iam in a similar situtation iam 19 weeks.yesterday i got a new top that make's it obvious "it's a baby"..i asked him if he liked it, he looked at my belly with a concerned manner and asked how much bigger ill get!:eek:

The other day he saw me naked and said "you look nice"..I didnt feel well that day and said "i dont really feel like it"...then he said "well, you should be greatful i said that!"

(when i wasnt pg i didnt have to "be greatful")

My DP still wont leave me alone as he is to horny...

I also hear "i still love you no matter what you look like"...should i be offended.. he says that out of the blue, without me saying anything...

[Tingles]

Ladies please be proud of your bodies!!! Your body is doing such an amazing thing & working sooo hard! You are making a miracle each day you progress...

Remember any weight you gain can be lost - if you take on a big gain (like I always do) it can take you up to 12 months to slowly and safley lose to weight (whilst b/feeding) - you might carry alot of fluid (like I do) so the first postnatal months you can see lots of fluid moving...

One of my dad's workers g'friends is PG too - they were having alot of 'problems' - I kept telling him, she's hormonal:ecomcity: ...Finally after their first antenatal class the penny dropped for him - he said I can now understand what she's going thru a bit...

If you feel like you need counselling have a look at
www.relationships.com.au
Non-profit community based organisation providing professional services to support relationships - I used to work for a lawfirm, and we always reffered people to them...

Goodluck - maybe something else is bothering him $$, work? You need to talk.

[leishacaz]

Thanks for your replies everyone. I think I was feeling very emotional the week I went through that and I'm back to normal now and everything's fine. DH has been really great and I think he's been having stress with work and stuff so I should prob be more understanding. But Im a hormonal pregnant woman so we have to expect a bit of craziness every now and then LOL!

Thanks again for your replies :)