Mothers group vent

[trina73]

We have been going to Mothers group for 3 years now and we have all become good friends, but lately things are not so good. there are 3 ladies in our group that are very close and so are their hubbies and they are always over each others houses which is fine it doesn't bother me but they have been going out on our alternate mothers group day which we normally do something, without the rest of us :mad: and there seems to be a bit of b!tching goin on.
Last week at mothers group my son who is autistic was playing up abit and he got a few nasty stares :no: sometimes i feel left out because of my sons condition and i feel that this is the reason that i'm not included. shall i say how i feel or is it best to leave it alone. i don't know what to do :gloomy:

[iluvmeboyz]

:hugs: :hugs:

so sorry for the bad experience i have had the same prob but i dont worry about it anymore ,i have to much in my fife to be in a mothers group maybe find another group or the rest that are being left out do a little group and dont worry about the others

[neeshNgeorgia]

That's a shame that a mothers group has become like that for u. Mum's groups are supposed to be there for support and helping each other out.

I dunno if i can give u ne advice, cos i wouldn't know what to do either.
With the few that have become close i wouldn't say ne thing, if they want to seperate them selves from the group so be it, that's totally up to them, and really they lose out, they'll lose the support and help from the rest of u girls.

As for u feeling out of place because of ur son's condition, DON'T! that is not their place to make u feel like that, i would speak up about that. It's not right, y should they feel like they can "stare" at ur child when he plays up, all kids do, it's apart of being a child!

Hope i could help out a little, :hugs: to u, maybe get the rest of the girls and do something without telling the other "few" and see how they like it!

[trina73]

Thanks girls, another thing that bothered me last week is that apparently my ds had punched one of the other boys in the nose, in which h e was no where near the boy, and the mother turned around and said ' oh but he isn' t the type to lie about it ' well my son can't defend himself as he doesn't talk, can't win :no:

[IheartOman]

It's always going to happen eventually when you put a group of women together! We cant help but get nasty :no:

I suggest chaning groups, nothing lasts forever.. Friends are there for a season reason or lifetime.. Looks like the seasons are changing :yes:

[FluffyDucks]

I suggest changing groups, nothing lasts forever.. Friends are there for a season reason or lifetime.. Looks like the seasons are changing :yes:

I agree with Shanilee. Its nice that you could get together over the last three years but if they are starting to get funny and not being understanding of your sons condition I would just blow them off and find a new more supportive group.

Lifes too short to waste your time on people that cant be bothered to take the time to think about other people.

Certainly you could speak with them but I would bet any money that they would all pretend innocence and say "what? us? nooooo!".

I must admit I dont know much about autisim and therefore dont understand what it would be like being a mum in your situation but I am sure if I was in your mothers group (for three years!) I would have taken some time to understand...and not just shut you out.

Blow em off! Find a more supportive group! No point wasting your time thinking about them any more then you have to!

[trina73]

It's always going to happen eventually when you put a group of women together! We cant help but get nasty :no:

I suggest chaning groups, nothing lasts forever.. Friends are there for a season reason or lifetime.. Looks like the seasons are changing :yes:
sounds that way to me too. it seems to me that they have formed their own group.

[SorenLorensen]

:hugs: for you and your boy
that is just plain nasty, and also the reason i have more male friends then female,
hope you work it out soon

[lachys_mama]

I'm so mean, when they bought up your son punching another kid in the nose (don't worry i believe you he didn't) I would have shrugged and ever so politely smiled and said 'well he probably deserved it' and walked off and found myself another mothers group who doesn't have women who think better of themselves than they are... or maybe you should have punched her in the nose and said "oops i guess it runs in the family":devil6: seriously though :hugs: to you and I'm sure there are some better mothers groups out there, maybe you could make your own up or something from the ladies on bubhub (i dunno where you're from though)... anyways like always i just rambled on complete nonsense :ecomcity: hope your situation gets sorted for you

[IheartOman]

I'm so mean, when they bought up your son punching another kid in the nose (don't worry i believe you he didn't) I would have shrugged and ever so politely smiled and said 'well he probably deserved it'

:laughing: Same!

[trina73]

I'm so mean, when they bought up your son punching another kid in the nose (don't worry i believe you he didn't) I would have shrugged and ever so politely smiled and said 'well he probably deserved it' and walked off and found myself another mothers group who doesn't have women who think better of themselves than they are... or maybe you should have punched her in the nose and said "oops i guess it runs in the family":devil6: seriously though :hugs: to you and I'm sure there are some better mothers groups out there, maybe you could make your own up or something from the ladies on bubhub (i dunno where you're from though)... anyways like always i just rambled on complete nonsense :ecomcity: hope your situation gets sorted for you
Your post has put a smile on my face :) thanks

[jessi]

Thats so sad that this is happening... you'd think theyd be more supportive!!

Perhaps you could do some looking around and find a mothers group of children who have Autism also?? At least then, they would definatly be supportive and sympathetic as they know exaclty what you are going through.

:)

[trina73]

The other 3 ladies have been great and are very supportive and the others were supportive at the start but it sounds to me they have changed a bit. i had a support group in my area but there hasn't been one for a while.i'm thinking of starting one on my own :yes:

[illawarramumof2boys]

hi:wave:

i'm sorry too about your mums group. i too have found from experience that putting several mums together always ends up being clicky and bit**y. playgroups i've found to be even worse and have given up on them altogether.:thumbsdown:

i now have 2 groups of mums that i try and catch up with weekly. one group has 3 mums and the other has 5. maybe try a smaller group. i've found them to be less of a prob and the small numbers mean all mums stay close friends.

i'd definately suggest trying another group. and maybe the mums you do get on with from the original mums group continue to see them outside out of the mums group scene as such. good luck anyway:D