Dad's in the Military

[Daddyof2]

I have been in the Navy for 3 years as a medic, just looking for some advice on how to tell my two daughters that I'm going away for 3 months and how to cope while Im away.:confused:

[daddaddad]

Tough patch. I spent a tenure away from my girls when they were about (a little younger) the same age.

They will be flexible. They will tug at your heart strings and your wife/partner will really notice that you're gone, but they will all be okay. In no time at all, you'll be feeling like they are getting along too well without you.

I suggest get on MSN or Skype with a webcam and video link. You can't touch or cuddle them but it is the best second you can come up with. At the very least snail mail video cassettes.

Think about msking up surprise boxes - You'll be amazied how cool a rock/feather/pressed flower etc from some strange location can be...

They'll survive as long as there is regular communication, which in closing, is your responsibility...

[Shakey]

hi Ben :wave: its good your asking for advise, most males doing bother and just leave their other halves to deal with it

my DH was in the army for 10years, our DS was to young to realise when daddy was away so we didn't have to deal with telling him

I know i'm not a dad or mum in the military but my advise would be to just tell them whats going on, they are both as the age where they will beable to know whats going on, explanine to them that you'll be away, you could make up a callendar for them, to mark off the day's till you'll be back (its a good thing to add a extra few days to to calandar as you may be held back for a few days, and kids can get upset when dad or mum isn't home when they said they were, and its always a lovely surprise when you arrive and they arn't expecting you,

the point i'm trying to make anyways is to try and make you going away a possitive thing, not a sad thing that dad is away, give them both a pic of you, so they have something while your away, 3mths will seam like a year to them,

I hope that has helped you a little

ETA the above posts have really good suggestions:thumbsup: , hope we've helped you a little

[MilkOnTap]

Hey Ben - great thread! My husband is in the navy as an ET (Ballarat) and we are currently expecting our first baby. The ship is due to go in for refit for a few months so we wont have to deal with this issue for a little while yet - but its something that is definitely on our minds for later on.

I love the idea of posting the kidlets something from whichever unique location you are in the world at the time - I think thats awesome.

Something else I have seen one friend do for their partner which might work well for kids is to have a 'special' toy with them - it might be a teddy bear or something; and have people take photos of the teddy bear travelling the world with you. I reckon when the girls see Daddy and the special bear together pulling funny faces or doing something silly together that would certainly help put a smile on their dial!!

[Shakey]

Something else I have seen one friend do for their partner which might work well for kids is to have a 'special' toy with them - it might be a teddy bear or something; and have people take photos of the teddy bear travelling the world with you. I reckon when the girls see Daddy and the special bear together pulling funny faces or doing something silly together that would certainly help put a smile on their dial!!

i've seen that being done before as well, kids definatly like that, to see dad and some kind of toy, just being funny for the kids,

[caxama27]

Hi Guys and Girls,

I would like to say that coming from a family whos father was in the Army for 10 years is cool, i was to little to understand that Dad was gone which was ok but when i was older it was a bit harder as he was gone for a month at a time, so it did get a bit harder especially for mum as she was left to look after 3 boys by her self and i can tell you we weren't the good boys.

I don't know about anyone else but when dad was in Army is was good and bad as dad would get postings and we would have to move school just as we were making friends then you would need to leave them and that was hard for us boys as it sucked trying to make new friends all the time. But on the good side i liked the travelling by car for days at a time and moving to a new house every couple of years.

Thanks
Caxama27

[sharvs]

My sons father is returning in a few weeks from 7 months overseas. DS was 9 months when he left, now he is a running, cheecky 15 month old. Whilst DS is too young to comprehend it (which is a good thing) I am really concerned about how they will bond when he gets home. Prior to his deployment, he was away for approx 6 months (on & off) so they really dont know each other. My partner regularly comments that he isnt really a dad which upsets me.

:fingerscrossed: it all goes ok, i will keep you updated.