what have i done?

[bubs_and_us]

oh god what have i done agreeing to DP working in the mines???? :gloomy:

he flew out today, and i've been on the verge of tears all day..... i feel so lost. i just want to sit and cry. he's working 2 on and 1 off, so its not too bad, but i still miss him so much (and its only been 1 day!)

i dont know how i'm going to do it.... or if i can do it? he rang tonight to talk, and i was fine while on the phone to him.... (he's got a promotion already!!) and was all happy to talk to him.... but then he had to go. as soon as i got off the phone, i just cried. and im crying now...... and i'll probably cry tomorrow.... and the next day. :crying:

please tell me it gets better? because if it doesnt, i dont think i can do this.........:no:

[AM]

O you poor thing!!

I know exactly how you are feeling, when my 2nd son was 3 weeks old, dh started interstate truck driving, and would be home once every 2 weeks.
Every time it came for him to go back out on the road, I just lost it big time, I would have full blown panic attacks, cry my eyes out, it was one of the worst experiences of my life.

It did slowly get better, but it took a while, but now I'm fine with it, and doesn't phase me one little bit.

How long is it until you see your DP again?

[bubs_and_us]

hey he's on a 2 and 1 roster, so i'll see him in 13 days.... hopefully (we dont have the flight details yet) i know it doesnt sound like long, and i keep telling myself "its only 2 weeks" but its so hard.... what am i going to be like in a weeks time?!?!

[2boysmama]

Mine works 9 on and 5 off. Try to focus on what is positive about it. Is he happier in the job? More money? Less washing??

[bubs_and_us]

wow, 9 and 5.... there is no way i could do that! we made an agreement that he would do no more than 3 weeks on at a time.......

[PrincessHailey]

I know exactly how you feel (except for we don't have little ones yet)

My DH flew out yesterday for his new FIFO job, 3 weeks on, 1 week off.

The only thing that is getting me through at the moment is the fact that it will be more money which means I can get more of what I want and when we finally get a :bfp: I know we will have enough money to see us through.

The airport was the worst, and then having an empty house last night. Also talking to him on the phone this morning was heart breaking

[kewlchicmum]

Hello :wave:
I know how you feel my DH does 2 and 2 and we have just had a baby 20th Jan and this is the second week of him being away since bub was born and I feel it's harder now that we have bub I cried when I was packing bub and me up at the airport after DH flew out.
My DH has been doing FIFO since I have meet him and I feel you never get used to them working away and I don't ever want to get used to him working away I want to miss him I want to get excited when he comes home I want to cry when he leave me (mmm if you know what I mean)....I do so I hope you get it other wise I sound really sad...:o

[Melo]

Ohhh huge :hugs: to you xx

[2s'nuff]

:hugs: Coming your way. It will get easier, just give it time. Think of the things you will gain by having DP away rather than the things you are missing. And enjoy the fact that when DP is home, you get a full week with him, with no work to interfere.

After a while you'll get a bit like those of us who have been doing it for some time and look forward to DP/DH getting back on the plane after they've been home for a week:laughing: .

[bubs_and_us]

thanks for all the :hugs: ....

another question..... what happens when you're sick and there's nobody to look after the kids??? i've been vomiting since DS went down for a sleep, i feel like death (and laying down makes it worse, hence why im on comp).... im dreading when DS wakes up and i've got to deal with him and vomiting....... do any of you have family to help you out, or do you just swallow it and get on with it?

[AM]

Yep, no family around for me, they are all in NZ, I just have to cope with a 3 year old and a 1 year old when I am sick. Hard, but you get there...

[2boysmama]

wow, 9 and 5.... there is no way i could do that! we made an agreement that he would do no more than 3 weeks on at a time.......

He works 9 12hr shifts on and 5 days off. Fly in, fly out to Central Australia

[kewlchicmum]

Well ya that is a good question what to do when sick well I have not been sick yet :fingerscrossed: while DH has been away its only first time since bub that he has been away but I know what you mean I have family Mum Dad and sister but they are all busy working school and stuff so I guess darl you just have to put up with it :hugs: I know its hard I have not slepted like for two nights and my eyes are hanging out of my head and I have tried to sleep when he has been sleeping in the day but just cant ...mmm watching the clock:eek:
I am here if you want to chat:)

[bubs_and_us]

He works 9 12hr shifts on and 5 days off. Fly in, fly out to Central Australia

haha my mistake!!! :o here was me thinking you're the strongest woman i've ever spoken to... being without your hubby for 9 weeks straight!!!! :o :laughing:

[diannamumof3]

oh god what have i done agreeing to DP working in the mines???? :gloomy:

he flew out today, and i've been on the verge of tears all day..... i feel so lost. i just want to sit and cry. he's working 2 on and 1 off, so its not too bad, but i still miss him so much (and its only been 1 day!)

i dont know how i'm going to do it.... or if i can do it? he rang tonight to talk, and i was fine while on the phone to him.... (he's got a promotion already!!) and was all happy to talk to him.... but then he had to go. as soon as i got off the phone, i just cried. and im crying now...... and i'll probably cry tomorrow.... and the next day. :crying:

please tell me it gets better? because if it doesnt, i dont think i can do this.........:no:
Hi Mine has been working fifo for 8 years. It does get better. I was like you when he first started I cried alot but is great now and we have a whole week to do things together and we are closer for it.

[Starlet]

Oh I know exactly how u feel!! I fell pregnant with bub #3 only a week after DP started his FIFO job(2 and 1) when he came home for a night. I was ok to start with, and then the morning sickness hit and it was soooo bad, I was spewing all day and night as well as having a 4 and 2 1/2 year old running around the place.

I found it so hard to cope and I cried every day he was away.

Now he's been away for 8 months and I'm doing much better with it all(but finding it hard to get everything done with a big fat preggo belly! LOL). We were without the net for most of that time, so I find that being able to come online and chatting helps. I also study at home so that takes up alot of time too.

Big hugs to u hun! Anytime u wanna chat, give me a yell!

BTW, not too sure how I will cope when the baby comes and I have to deal with my two AND a newborn!!

[Coyote]

This was the 2nd lot of 2 weeks that my DH has been away for. The first time when I said goodbye I balled my eyes out. Got home and broke down. Everytime I spoke to him on the phone we would both be in tears. I think it makes it worse cause you feel for them being away from DS. I couldnt do it!!
The 2nd time I still cried at the airport when I said goodbye. I was thinking I was doing heaps better until the other night when I broke down, DS has been very sookie getting teeth and it all just reached a max!!
He is home tomorrow and the excitment that I have been feeling for the past couple of days is just great. I am just not looking forward to next Sunday when I have to say goodbye again!!
I dont know if its all worth it!! :) Hang in there

[rat117]

i am proud to say that you are strong, you are doing it.... think positive... i know its hard....

my partner is going back in the army and he wants to go to afgan to earn money for our baby who is coming in three weeks.... e verytime i think about it i cry.... but i have to keep thinkin he is going to do it for us....

going by what the other ladies have said it gets easier.....

[mummyof5]

You get used to it, eventually. Mine is in the navy. When 5th child was 6 weeks old, he left for interstate, didn't see him again until we moved up 4 weeks later, and then 2 months after that (after periods of 5-14 days at sea), he left for 6 months in the persian gulf. I survived, we had good days and bads days, especially when I got put in hospital, some family had to travel down and ptich in, but on a whole it all works out.
He got out last year, and six months later wanted to get back, so now we are MWDU, which is basically us living in the hunter and him in Sydney through the week. He comes home on weekends if he isn't at sea.
Somedays it's no problem and other days it totally sucks! He is used to me telling him how much I hate now, just makes the appropriate assurances till I get past it, lol.
Good luck adjusting, and some :hugs: for the cruddy days!!

[Wish_Bear]

Like Mummyof5 my Dh is in the Navy too. You do get used to it. In the past two years he has been away for 16 months. He also left for 6 months in 01 and then again in 03 just after DD was born. He loves it but it can be a ***** of a life.
When I was preg with DS I was soo sick for 4 months straight, vomiting 24/7 and running around after a 2 yr old!! Not fun. I guess you just learn to deal with it in whatever way gets you through. Good luck and you are not alone.

[kym479]

Well I am a born "sook" so everytime that we drop DH at the airport we make a deal not to cry - I get teary as soon as I get near the airport and my stomach knots up. As soon as we say goodbye, we make it quick then I race to the car and either let the tears flow or "suck it up" and take a deep breath and smile because I know he is doing this so that we can have a great life. After the airport, once I am home, I get so caught up looking after DS that I forget the tears and start the countdown of how many sleeps until Daddy is home - he works 4 weeks on 1 week off. I always said no to working away if it was more than 2 weeks at a time but as DH works in mine construction, it is very hard to get anything under 4 weeks. We talked about our goals and why we were considering this and decided if we don't try it now we will regret it - and to be honest I think we would have.

It does get easier - I don't think the airport does, but your feelings about it all will. I was quite ill the week before DH came home and then DS caught the same bug so we were both miserable but you just get along with it. I have wonderful IL's 5 mins down the road so I am quite lucky in that respect but noone wants to look after a sick baby to give you a break :( .

I do a countdown with DS and talk about Daddy everyday so when we get to only a couple of sleeps we are both excited (well I am saying that DS is excited even though he is only 5 1/2 months). I always make sure that Daddy is in the conversation and because of it DS always knows his Dad when he is on the phone or at the airport. We both chat over MSN when not on the phone which is great. TO be honest sometimes I am even jealous of him - drinking, playing sport or music and having fun almost every night while I am mum 24/7 with no break.

I am here if you need a chat, support is important in the first few times he is away. It does get better slowly, hang in there because if you have a goal it is worth it. :hugs:

[Proudofmy3Babies]

please tell me it gets better? because if it doesnt, i dont think i can do this.........:no:

:hugs: to you!!!

For some of us who's partners were working away before the kids, it sometimes might seem easier because we were prepared for it.

But unfortunately it will never feel any easier!!

My husband and I moved to QLD and we have no family here, he does 4 on 4 off on an oil rig.

He went away when DD was 3wks old and it was really difficult, but what I have found in the last two trips away, is that provided bubb isn't really unsettled, the more time I spend with her the easier it is for me, I throw my whole life into her and it gets me through, and makes me appreciate my husband more when he is home!!!

My DD is super clingy and whingy because of the amount of attention and time I give her, but I don't care because Im not lonely at home anymore when he is away.

You will get stronger!!! Enjoy the time he is home, distance will make the heart fonder and thats why it never gets any easier saying goodbye, I cry still at the airport.

Chatting on here will help!!! Or find some of his workmates wives that live in your area, I have and my husbands workmates wife is a really great friend of mine now!!

Mel