pls. Help

[indian mom]

:confused: Hi everyone,
I hope someone can help me with their helpful advices on how to start my DD who is 19 months old n refuse to eat anything on her own to start eating without my help.
She won't eat even a bite herself n the food will be kept for hours on her table.And if i'll start feeding her then she'll keep it in her mouth until i pressurize her to start chewing.Sometimes it's very frustrating n i lose control n shout at her.Later i feel guilty about it.I don't know what should I do or how to solve this problem.

Please help
Thanx

[mummycloud]

Hi Indian Mom :)

sounds like your DD is a ver playful little bub and like to make a game out of things,Either that or she just isn't hungry..lol
Maybe try the earoplane on the spoon game? Also, maybe offer her food only when asks for it.She won't let herself starve and lots of kids go off food at the age for a while :)

[indian mom]

thanx Genie
but there is one more problem.she is bilingual n doesn't speak much.How will she tell me that she's hungry?
I don't want to starve her.
I'll try aeroplane technique but then again i've to feed her.
I hope u understand my dilemma

but thanx for ur advice

[mummycloud]

I understand you dilemma :)

Maybe you can offer her food and if she shakes her head or pushes the food away, that's her way of saying no thanks :)
You may have to continue feeding her for a while longer, she seems to not be ready to feed herself all the time just yet.
As I said before, she won't let herself starve. If she's hungry enough, she will feed herself ;)

[H&B'sMum]

I agree wtih Genie, children dont' starve themselves. She will let you know hwen she is hungry through body lang. She might stand near the fridge or stand near the pantry door. That's what my Harry does. When he pushes the food away then I know he's had enough.
To get Harry to feed himself I put his plate or bowlof food in front of him with his fav spoon (a wiggles one), because he eats his food at the table when we do he sees us eating with knives, forks and spoons and he wants to as well. SO you could try getting her to eat her meals when you do and you model how to feed yourself. Give her lots of praise evern when she attempts to feed herself.
You could also try giving her finger foods to eat herself, banana, toast, breadsticks to name just a few might help as well.
She won't starve and will eat when hungry. Hang in there, most children go through a fussy stage and won't eat anything, but keep offering and she wil eventually eat.

[Shazbutt]

My DD1 who is 2 1/2 is like that sometimes, though will feed herself easily....Sometimes she won't eat her meals, and i just leave them out in a container for her (when suitable), and she eats when she's hungry, which could be up to an hour later! But she doesn't starve herself.... Even at night sometimes, she will only eat a couple of bites of food, and will go to sleep, and not wake through the night hungry.

I too agree with the other mums, she will eat when she's hungry...she may not tell you in words, but will go to the door of the fridge or pantry, or cry to you maybe? Sorry i can't be of more help...

[Baby Girl]

My DD1 and I used to fight like cats and dogs when it came time for her to eat. Eventually I dropped all structure and routine out of her eating. All her foods are on the bottom 2 shelves in the pantry and the bottom shelf in the fridge. She knows what she wants to eat and she'll go and get it and ask me to open it when she wants to eat it. She snacks alot through the day rather than eating 3 actual meals. The only "meal time" she has is dinner with the whole family and then I let her serve herself out of small bowls onto her plate and we have a rule that whatever you serve to yourself you have to eat. I found by giving her a bit of control over her eating it became less of a fight. I still know what she is eating because I know what I keep in the fridge and cupboard and I know how much she is eating because I know how much I put in there too. I started doing this with DD1 when she was about 16 months and by 18 months she was eating plenty of good foods. It took her aq while to get used to the change but she always found some way of letting me know she was hungry.

Have you tried sign language with your DD? I found while my DD was learning to talk (and even before) it was easier for her to make gestures rather than put words together.

[Chickadee]

Have you tried sign language with your DD? I found while my DD was learning to talk (and even before) it was easier for her to make gestures rather than put words together.
I've also seen suggestions of making up picture boards for kids, so they can point to what they want before they can talk very well. I haven't tried it though.

I agree with what the others have said, that sometimes if you stop trying to push a toddler to eat they will eat when they want and only as much as they want. By not pushing, they won't eat any more or less than they did when being pushed by you, but all the stress and frustration over meals and eatting goes away.

You might find some of the suggestions on this web site useful: Appetite Slump in Toddlers (http://www.aboutkidshealth.ca/Article.asp?articleID=1702). It is put together by the Sick Kids Hospital in Toronto (Canada).

[indian mom]

Thanx a lot to all u great ladies!

I will start trying this way from now onwards.
Hope this works

Will let u know when it's successful
Thanx once again