How do you co-sleep?

[Mummabear]

I was wondering if you girls wouldn't mind sharing with me how you actually go about co-sleeping.

We have a water bed so putting bubs in the bed with us is not an option, but I have been holding him in my arms and sleeping like that for a few hours at a time when he's hard to settle.

I'm exploring my options with co-sleeping in an attempt to help me bond with DS#2. I'm considering getting our old double bed from my aunt and putting it in the nursery so I can co-sleep with him, but at the risk of sounding stupid, I don't really know how to actually go about sleeping with a newborn.

We have DS#1 in bed with us sometimes, but he's so big now that the only thing we have to worry about is waking up with his foot wedged in our mouths or up our noses, lol.

Your feedback, suggestions and instructions would be greatly appreciated.

Also - any other tips that you have in relation to AP and helping me bond with DS#2 would be welcomed also. I have a sling that he is happy in, but the thing is that I don't really have to walk much during the day, we just kind of hang around the house most days so it seems pointless putting him in the sling and just standing around.

[the_queen]

Hi mate :hugs:

The way I co-sleep is I have a cot side-carred to my bed. One side of the cot is off completely, and it's pushed up against my bed. The mattresses are level with each other so it's just like an extension of my bed.

Sleeping with him in bed with you, there are some rules (just like there are with cot-sleeping; you know, the ways to make it safe and avoid SIDS)
Some of the recommendations are:

* sleep baby between mum and the wall (ie not between 2 adults)
* Don't have feather quilts (although I do have a very lightweight cotton summer quilt, but when I have my winter-weight feather quilt on, he doesn't go under it.)
* No pillows near baby's head (I have pillows but only on the opposite side to him, so I can kinda roll over and have a pillow if I want one.

When Curtis was very small, I'd have him in the crook of my arm, while I was kinda half-sitting up in bed. The other thing for newborns is to sleep on your chest - you have 2 or 3 pillows, prop yourself up a bit, and have bubby on your chest.

The more you do it, the more natural it will seem, so don't feel silly - it is a scary prospect because our culture doesn't really see it as "mainstream". In the hot weather it's a bit easier - if you do get the old double bed out, and just you and bubby are on the bed, just lay him on the bed after he's asleep, then you lay down next to him and I generally lay on my side next to him, with one arm up over above his head.

:hugs: :hugs: The Dr Sears website has some co-sleeping idea's, http://www.askdrsears.com (http://www.askdrsears.com/)

:hugs:

[shed]

I use a pillow but DS doesn't have a pillow, he is up next to me so our heads are even and the blanket goes over us both.

When he was just a wee one we had a hard scooped out pillow type thing that he would lay on, his head even with our heads and the blanket over us all.

I don't know where we got that pillow from, we just had it.

Maybe a tetra bed type thing would be an option for you.

As for your other question, I would suggest bathing and showering together. Its just the best fing ever.

[motherlylove]

wow someone else who has a water bed

[3 bambinos]

As for your other question, I would suggest bathing and showering together. Its just the best fing ever.

I 100% agree here. DS and I share a bath at night and it is a great bonding time. We play and have lots of cuddles and I love it!

[Mummabear]

Thanks girls. As silly as it sounds the prospect of sharing a bed with a newborn is rather scary to me, simply for the safety factor. I love having DS#1 in bed with us though, so I'm sure I would love co-sleeping with DS#2.

One of the hurdles for me to get over is DH. He's not keen on me leaving the marital bed. I kind of understand where he's coming from because with each pregnancy I've had to leave the bed due to discomfort so he feels like he's only just got me back. Plus he's not real big on change or anything that involves him having to move furniture, lol.

I was wondering if it was worth getting on of those newborn bed thingies that I've seen in the shops. I've seen them at KMart. They're rectangular, have a night light at the head of the bed and basically just act as a mini crib to put in the bed. We also have a tetra snuggle bed, but the problem with this is that it's so lumpy, I don't know if we just got a bad one or if they're all like that, but when we put it on the bed it's all uneven and not very comfortable looking. Having said that though I'm sure it would be different on a normal bed. Do you think using one of these types of things would be good or do you feel that they get in the way of the mother-infant bonding?

I think I might try and persuade DH that me moving into the nursery with the double bed is a good idea. Any suggestions on how to sweet talk him, lol??

Any other tips, idea, suggestions, etc would be greatfully accepted.

[the_queen]

You might not be in the mood for rumpy-pumpy yet ;) but one thing that co-sleepers often say is that it makes love-making more spontaneous and fun... the kid is asleep in the marital bed, oh well, we'd better have sex on the kitchen bench then :D And if it's snuggling and cuddling that he thinks he'll miss out on, remember that if you set it up right, you can still cuddle and snuggle with him, while having bubby in the bed on the other side of you. Or make a pact to have snuggle time on the couch every night before bedtime.

:hugs:

[Mummabear]

Here is a pic of that bed thingy that I was trying (badly) to explain in my post above....

The bed thingy (http://i33.photobucket.com/albums/d58/NewMumJuly05/untitled.jpg)

[Shanaynay]

I was wondering if it was worth getting on of those newborn bed thingies that I've seen in the shops. I've seen them at KMart.
Personally I wouldn't bother. It's hard to breastfeed bub while they are in that as you can't fall aleep as you are uncomfortable, or you have to stay awake to put bub back into the bed thing.
When bub was little, I used to sleep with her in the crook of my arm like Queenie described. I found it was very secure and I knew where she was all night.


You might not be in the mood for rumpy-pumpy yet ;) but one thing that co-sleepers often say is that it makes love-making more spontaneous and fun...
I can vouch for that! May be TMI, but this morning at 5am, we were on the loungeroom floor ;)

[nats]

I can vouch for that! May be TMI, but this morning at 5am, we were on the loungeroom floor ;)

Well isn't that just fabulous :p

Mumma bear on the other hand dont feel bad if you explore co-sleeping and give it a miss! I mean I love my DS but having him sicking up and nappy leaking all over my bed and taking over all my space so I wake up with a crick in my neck is just *blaaaaa*
I have him in a cot at the end of our bed so I feed him laying down in our bed at night but when he's done it's back to the cot where he can puke and fart peacefully all night :yes:

[Mummabear]

when he's done it's back to the cot where he can puke and fart peacefully all night :yes:

I laughed so hard I think snot came out my nose. I needed that laugh too - thanks Nats.


It's hard to breastfeed bub while they are in that as you can't fall aleep as you are uncomfortable, or you have to stay awake to put bub back into the bed thing.

My boobs don't work so I have to get up to heat a damn bottle anyway, but I get your point. I kind of like the idea of holding him most of the night anyway. That's what I've been doing in our bed, but I'm just petrified of letting go of him during the night and him rolling face down and not being able to move because it's a water bed, so if I'm going to continue in taking him to bed with me I really need to convince DH that the separate bed in the nursery is the way to go.

[shed]

DS and I are about to experience our fourth night of sleeping together alone i.e. without DP in the spare bed.

It started because I had a really bad head cold so I said I would sleep in the spare room so I wouldn't keep DP awake with my sneezing and coughing and germs.

The next night was the same. The third night I just said "I am sleeping in the spare room again" and waited for him to protest.

I think he is getting some sleep for the first time in months coz he goes "okay".

I am loving it.

So my suggestion is to catch a cold!

[KapowSchazam]

As for your other question, I would suggest bathing and showering together. Its just the best fing ever.

:yes: YUP!!! The best!!!


I can vouch for that! May be TMI, but this morning at 5am, we were on the loungeroom floor ;)

Hmmm... yup, you're right!!! TMI girl!!! ;)


I laughed so hard I think snot came out my nose. I needed that laugh too - thanks Nats.

Also TMI!!!


So my suggestion is to catch a cold!


Might have to try that one myself!!!

Not wanting to take over your thread or anything, but how does everyone else handle a bub that wants to play in bed all the time??? I bring DD in once she's asleep, but if I pop her in bed without me in she wakes up crying, and if I get in, she wakes up and wants to play!!! What do I do??? I've had her in her cot for a while now and I miss co-sleeping sooo much!!!

[YoungSupaMum]

Hi we have DS in the middle of us, he is getting rather big now tho and thinking of putting a cot next to our bed with one of the sides down. Im not sure how he will go with that tho!
Plus I do miss snuggling DP at night, and yes we have become a lot more adventurous! ;)

DP and I both use pillows, but Ash doesnt and we have him at the same level of us in bed.
It has always worked well for us! :thumbsup: