PLEASE HELP ..... at the end of my tether

[Tisme]

Has anybody ever had a child with "toddler tummy" or "toddler diarrhea"????

OK this may turn out long but i gotta get it all down so PLEASE read.

My Son is 4 next Feb. He was completely toilet trained earlier this year around January, where we were going for two weeks completely accident free. then in Feb he got a gastro bug, which hit him and my daughter VERY hard for a week.

Ever since this he has had great difficulty with getting to the toilet in time and as such I believe has lost confidence in himself. we ended up at the doctor and after running numerous tests from stool samples, to blood, to allergy, there is no MEDICAL reason for the loosness of his bowel. So off to the paediatrician who ordered more tests and did more thorough research before diagnosing "toddler tummy". A 3 yr old with TODDLER probs?? anyways he suggested that until it fixes itself up (which he assured me it would over time) that we cease toilet training. Great idea in theory, but you try telling a perfectly capable if not somewhat obstinate little man that he has to go back into Nappies for a little while because we don't know what is wrong with him.

Anyways we have had to continue with trying to get him to the toilet, but now although the stools are starting to firm up, he is still wetting and dirtying himself up to 10 times a day some days, and the very next day he goes all day with no accidents. he takes great pride in his great days, but takes ABSOLUTELY no interest in his wet or dirty times .... doesn't want them even taken off him!!

I am at wits end (and VERY HORMONAL). please help?????

[WeThree]

oh Eleanor, you poor thing, and poor Ciaron too....:(

I dont have much advice im afraid, just (((HUGS))) but do you put pull ups on him? or even pads? this might make him feel a bit better rather than nappies :)

[Tisme]

Never thought of pads ..... he just goes from tantrums, to whining to that real "Please don't make me" look.

[Tisme]

Never thought of pads ..... he just goes from tantrums, to whining, to that real "Please don't make me" look.

The thing that gets me the most is when i ask him "have you had an accident?" really quietly he looks up at me and says "I don't know" HOW COULD HE NOT KNOW!!!! He was totally trained for just over a month!!! How could he not know???

[Tisme]

It does ... thanks.

Unfortunately (I sound like a whinger sorry!!) my son is also allergic to MILK and EGG ... so yoghurt is out, but I might try kids acidophillus (sp?) tablets .... should do the same thing??

I'm willing to give anything a try at this point in time. Having said that though he hasn't had an accident today and yesterday had a small one but told me straight away so there was no big fuss.

I guess I just have to go back to the start .... but without the threat of nappies. It's too hard .... I don't want to be mum anymore. BOO HOO

[annab]

hi eleanor........ i sorta understand what u r going thru my son had an operation a few months back now cause of a bladder/kidney reflux problem and ended up back in nappies after being fully toileted trained before the op. this was a depressing time for him and me was like we had to start all over again. Now to this day he is still not fully toilet trained again.... still has some accidents and he is almost 4. they told me it would set him back a bit but i am starting to feel that i am failing cause not matter what i try he just don't do it and goes and wee's in the corner.

I guess we just have to keep at it and it will finally happen for us :o

[Tisme]

How do you deal with the loss of confidence in himself??? My boy just tells me now "but I can't mum" or "I don't know when it's coming" he has lost all the confidence and pleasure he used to get out of making it and learning something new.

I feel so saddened as my daughter goes days without an accident and so to be fair on him we play her achievements down a little but still you can see on his face and in his eyes that he KNOWS she is doing better than him.

[Busymumof3]

Whenever you hear him say 'he can't' or similar reply back with 'Yes you can' or something similar to help him build back his confidence. My son lacks in confidence and I find if I keep telling him he can and encourage him, he starts to believe it.

Hope this helps.