a court matter

[Emcee]

im just curious as to what would happen in the situation wher iam currently looking after my son 4months, I split from the father because he has various abusive problems. Im confused about allowing him to see my son at present because of hes issues though he has never shown abuse towards are son but he hasnt been around him that much either, hes currently attending anger management he loves his son n wants to always see him. im not letting him at moment. If we went to court to sort out custody or just my ex's right to access seeing my son on the basis that hes past history is abuse, do u think he will be eligible for access? does anybody know anyone whos gone thru this or know who to ask for legal advise. i just want to be prepared for the future, i dont think hes capable of looking after him, hes immature and cant trust hes aggresion im worried that they will say he can see him, wen i kno how to take care of him best!

[SorenLorensen]

i could not help you with advice because i dont know much about that side of the law but you could give leagel aid a call and they would for sure help you out, they should be in the yellow pages
good luck

[Lunar]

You can make an appointment at your local court house to speak to the chamber of magistrate, then you can make a date for a hearing. I went through the same thing. Legal aid wouldn't help me, they thought I didn't have to worry (even though my ex was an alcoholic, and abusive in all ways) so I did it on my own.

I just did the above and went from there. the loser didn't even show after 2 hearings, so the order went in my favour so now he has no rights.

Call legal aid though and see what they have to say.
No matter what, you don't have to let him see him if you think he is a danger.

:fingerscrossed: for you.
:hugs:

[catalicious]

He prob would get access, on the basis of it being Supervised access..

Then if the supervisor after a few visits says they think he is doing well it goes to one time a week for one hour on his own with him then after a few weeks it goes up..

Hope it all goes well and safe for you and your bubs..

[Lunar]

He prob would get access, on the basis of it being Supervised access..

Then if the supervisor after a few visits says they think he is doing well it goes to one time a week for one hour on his own with him then after a few weeks it goes up..

Hope it all goes well and safe for you and your bubs..

Not if there is a history of violence and substance abuse. It will remian supervised for some time, but only if the courts approve access.

[mykidzmylife]

Many years ago my ex and i separated,after much domestic violence,and ex said he would rather see baby dead than with me and the police said until it happened,they couldnt do anything as he was never violent to the kids.

[MCNmummyof2]

Many years ago my ex and i separated,after much domestic violence,and ex said he would rather see baby dead than with me and the police said until it happened,they couldnt do anything as he was never violent to the kids.

That is absolutely rediculous!! A bit OT, but I remember a show I watched on Oprah where her husband had tried to murder her, and he was let out because he didnt have history of domestic violence!!

[Lunar]

Many years ago my ex and i separated,after much domestic violence,and ex said he would rather see baby dead than with me and the police said until it happened,they couldnt do anything as he was never violent to the kids.

This is not the case these days. He has shown he is violent and that is all that matters in the eyes of the courts.

I had an AVO on my ex(due to domestic violence) and that was taken into account when I went to court over custody with DD. He didn't even show up so everyhitn went my way anyhow (he was probably passed out drunk some where).

[SorenLorensen]

my cousing has visitation unsupervised with her son J. she has a history of violence and drug abuse, but has never done anything anything to J (physicaly anyway). it started out as supervised access and that was fazed out with in 3 months. now she gets J every second saturday for the full day. her ex partner (so they say) also has visitation and he has the same history, but his was never supervised (well kinda, he did not have to have it supervised because a first he only got J for 2 hours and it was to be at his home with Js grandmother present)
my aunt who has custody of J was not happy with this out come but at the moment she cant do much about it, my cousin knows if she does 1 thing she has lost any contact with J forever (and i am pretty sure it will happen soon), my aunt already has J till he is 18.

[princessarra]

Id go speak to a solicitor and get legal advise first. If it went to court id assume they would want him assessed and have shrink reports ect before they make a decision. Until then it will probably be supervised access.

[jessgray]

Id go speak to a solicitor and get legal advise first. If it went to court id assume they would want him assessed and have shrink reports ect before they make a decision. Until then it will probably be supervised access.

i agree with that post:thumbsup:

if he gets accssess it will be supervised,this can be done by a trusted friend or relative or a family services worker,thats what my ex-step dad went through anyway to see his 3 kids till he turned his life around:hugs:

[Emcee]

ok, thanks guys.. sounds like it could go a few ways then, i will ring legal aid anyway. these men should be taken seriously i mean from some of the things im hearing it seems the law is too easy on these guys its shocking! i think as soon as they hear about abusive violence they should be behind bars and thats that, then we probly wouldnt have so many psycho's on the lose killing family n what not else :no:

[princessarra]

Let's face it..... if the matter really meant that much to him thyen he would be willing to comply with anything you set down for him

[Emcee]

yeh, well its funny becoz he threatend to take ME to court because he asked me for our sons birth certificate n instead of saying yes ok sraight away i said what are u wanting it for just casualy u kno, then he starts going off saying i wont let him do anything and i want to have all the control etc which he is so stupid for saying that but anyway he sent me a text saying okay ill see u in court n i replied, ok yeh im happy to go but just remember the court is going to want to kno y i left u and there is a report of ur violence cya, n then he calls back in a totally diff tone saying ok well i guess theres no point going we can just stick 2our agreements (wateva that is) 2much hassle lol i got him there :laughing: he oviously didnt think b4 he txt'd bt that was kinda a wake up call for me that it might have to come to that, and if the outcome will be good from my side then i will be the one taken him to court in the future.