bub taking AGES to fall asleep?

[charlottesmum]

Just wondering if anyone can offer some advice/reassurance to a new mum. My little one is 6 wks old and I am a first time mum. The main issue is that she seems to fight sleep. She shows the classic tired signs and I wrap her and proceed with the settling to sleep routine: rocking/patting/soothing music/dummy(I know, I know) and put her in the cradle when she's sleepy, but not asleep.
I find myself having to stand in the doorway to replace her dummy repeatedly as she can be almost completely asleep but if the dummy falls out, we have to start from scratch. If she gets grizzly I try and stroke her forehead/pat her bottom until she gets sleepy again and then walk away (with the aim of her falling asleep alone instead of in my arms).
This caper can go on for 2 hrs or more, day and night! Some days are particularly bad...other days not so bad. I am thinking it may have something to do with this disgusting heat as our air con is not working and she seems to be worse on hot days.
Anyone else experience this?
Advice much appreciateed :o

[mummaware]

hi charlottes mum,

my boy is nearly 8months old and has decided to do exactly what your babe is doing. When he was 6 weeks, i had no idea what to do so i went to Trescillion and after that i could settle him much easier, i didn't have a b/feed schedule either so i then went to feeding him every 3 hours and made sure that he had bathtime the same time every night and eventually be dropped all night feeds and went from 7-7.30pm until 6am. I also took up wrapping him a sh0.
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[charlottesmum]

Thanks for the reply mummaware....it seems your reply was cut short when u were mentioning wrapping. Am keen to hear the rest of your reply :o

[rosedubs]

Hi Charlottesmum,

I had the same problem. There is a fantastic website called:

www.silentnights.org (I think that is it) If not type Silent nights into google. The owner is Dr Brian Symon. Solved my sleeping probs!!

[vonnie100]

Hi,
We had the same problem with Caitlin. She would be very hard to settle and the dummy falling out was a real problem untill around 3 months. It is a very hard time to settle into a routine when you have a new baby, I remember sitting up for long hours of the night trying to stay awake and settle/feed. I cant really remember the things that we did, we invested in a swing that we could put her in and it would rock her to sleep, the only trouble was getting her out would wake her, we went for long drives. The best thing that we did was got a DVD with gentle music that shows lots of bright colours and children playing and animals etc. This has been the best thing we did. She could be screaming and as soon as she heard the music she would stop and watch untill she fall sound asleep. Even now that she is 10 months old she still loves to watch the video (not as much as playschool though). Maybe you could keep your eye out for something like that. You can find these DVDs in ABC book stores . Hope this helps and dont worry to much, it does become easier.
Vonnie

[charlottesmum]

Hi Rose,
We tried the techniques on the website tonite but maybe not such a good idea to start at the end of the day when we are all stinking hot and sweating in this heat. We tried 3 cycles of the 5min crying and 1min trying to offer her some comfort without picking her up. We caved in as she was hysterical and was so hot and sweaty.
I am keen to try again tomorrow but am wondering how the dummy fits into this technique? It seems pointless to replace the dummy during the 1min of attending to her. Any pointers on how to get rid of it? She's only 6 wks old and already she has formed a strong association between sucking dummy and settling.
I will buy the book and read all the details when I can get to the bookshop. Any help in the meantime would be great!
Corina (charlottesmum)

[nickosmoo]

Hi

I've had the same problem, especially around the 6 week time also but something changed around 8 weeks and Nico is now in a sort-of pattern at night. I give him a feed around 6 ish and then a warm bath and on go the jammies and usually he's pretty knackered by then and is ready to sleep. I find that if I put him down with a dummy he does the same thing, spits it out and then wakes himself up so I've resorted to holding him until he falls asleep (which I didn't want to do but he's staying asleep for a while afterwards) and then easing the dummy out of his mouth - this only works if he is really tired (usually the night sleep after the bath routine etc).

I agree about the dummy and there are times when I wish I'd never given him one but I've found that as time has gone on he needs it less and less so we can only hope that they get sick of it (like we are!) Now that he's figured how to put his hands in his mouth we're encouraging that instead! :D

[Lucybelle]

As far as I thought, babies dont/cant get into any type of routine until after the 12 week mark anyway. They just don't work.
Baby is only very tiny right now, and this weather really sucks. You might have to grin and bear it, just for a little while. (Keep in mind I am the mother of a VERY light sleeper so I completely get it). This weather throws everything out the window. Hang in there!!!

[mamafelix]

Personally I could never see the point in having to leave a bub to 'fall asleep alone'- Felix always fell asleep so much quicker and easier in my arms/while feeding.

I wouldn't worry too much about 'rules' or 'the right way' the right way is the way that works for you and your bub. Follow you instincts and your heart, there are no hard and fast rules for parenting it's different for everyone.

[jessica]

Hi,

I'm relieved to see that it isnt just my little angel struggling with the heat!! We haven't had a decent nights sleep in over three weeks now, she wakes nearly hourly uncomfortable and sweaty... :eek: unfortunatley we don't have aircon... I even took her to the doctor to check she didnt have a belly infection as she seems to have alot of gas too.. but all clear!

Have just got the book "silent nights" from the library, but will wait till the weather settles down before I give it a go.. I don't want to put her through too much distress when this heat is already causing her discomfort... lets hope that when it cools down she go's back to her old sleep patterns..

Jessica

[charlottesmum]

Hi all,
Just updating you on situation with our little darling. We were recommended by the Community Nurse to try this settling technique so they get used to associating being in their cradle/cot with sleep. Basically you put them down, wrappped, when they show tired signs and make sure they're generally awake for max of 1.5 to 2 hrs between feeds.
She usually cries, so we have to roll her onto her side away from us and put a hand on her shoulder until she stops. For the first few days she was crying for 1.5 hrs but more recently she cries for anywhere from not at all, to around 30mins. In the evenings its a bit different and is usually awake and crying between feeds.
It pretty rough on me listening to all that crying. I am finding that the slightest noise from her when she is asleep makes me feel all anxious and horrible, with fear that she's about to erupt into a full blown scream fest. :(
Its hard to cope with this sleep deprivation and I am also finding that when she actually DOES get to sleep, then I find myself lying awake for hrs on end! :eek:
Anyone else experience this?
Corina

[msmum]

Hi all,

Have been reading your posts and can really relate to many of the things you are writing. I am the mum of a 10 week old and getting him off to sleep can be quite a challenge at times. I guess my coping strategy is to persist with a routine as much as you can and believe that it is not forever! I find that it can take anywhere up to an hour to settle him to sleep, sometimes it might only be 5 minutes. Babies are so unpredictable, don't you think?

msmum :)

[xkwzit]

Hi Corina
I found a great thing was Hush essential oil from "the perfect potion" shop. I would put this on my pulse points after a night feed and it really helped me get back to sleep. I think that you associate the smell with sleep and it made it alot easier for me to drop off. I know they have shops in Brisbane and there is also a website www.perfectpotion.com.au (not sure where you are).

Best of Luck :p

ps thought I'd better stress that the oil is for YOU not baby

[charlottesmum]

Hi Samantha,
Just looked on perfect potions website and specifically at the "Hush" pulse point product. It contains a mixture of roman chamomile, lavender, tangerine and other relaxing essential oils. I live in NSW but am sure I could get something similar locally or buy it from them online.
Thanks for your suggestion.
Corina :)