Why doesnt he like to sleep during the day????

[FluffyDucks]

My beautiful little boy is 4 1/2 months old and he hates to sleep during the day. He cries and screams and fights it all the way until he goes down....but only during the day. At night he is a dream...will resettle himself if he wakes up and is the perfect baby...needs no settling from me.

But the days!!! Oh boy! It takes about 15mins of him screaming the house down for him to sleep. I darken the room, put him in his sleeping bag so its like nighttime, but will need to rock or pat him to sleep (all while he is crying). After he is down I am shattered...its exhausting and I hate seeing him so upset. Especially seeing those tears!

Why the difference between night and day?

Any answers?

[ChristineM]

Do you have a night time pre-bed routine that you don't do through the day. He might just be a bub that really responds to routine. I'm just guessing, trying to help you out. :)

[FluffyDucks]

Hmmm...well the only difference is is that I do a 'final feed' and put him down at night (goes to bed at 7pmand wakes at 4am for a feed).

During the day he sleeps for half an hour every two hours so at one or two of the sleeps its between feeds. If I gave him a final feed before eah day sleep he may only ever snack and not get a full feed....but if its stops him crying....?

Thanks for the feedback!

[JnA]

Mine is exactly the same... sleeps beautifully through the night, but fights it during the day. I tried every possible method I could think of or read about.. I just accept that's what happens now. She wins.

[Heids]

Mine is exactly the same... sleeps beautifully through the night, but fights it during the day. I tried every possible method I could think of or read about.. I just accept that's what happens now. She wins.

I think that is what I need to do with my ds, I have tried all the methods too and none will work ??? Maybe I should just give up and let him rule the root as I'm at my wits end trying and I feel like a failure :(

Heids

[JnA]

I think that is what I need to do with my ds, I have tried all the methods too and none will work ??? Maybe I should just give up and let him rule the root as I'm at my wits end trying and I feel like a failure :(

Heids


awww *hugs* I know what that's like, when you are in tears and feeling like you can't do this job because, no matter what you try, it's not working. ("But why are you crying, I love you so much and have tried everything I can think of, what *am* I doing wrong")
Then I think, "ok, you can call the shots now.. but by gosh, when you are three..." :D

[FluffyDucks]

I have to say that its nice to know that I am not the only one that feels like this as well. And thank you Jaderocks.....I have just excepted it now and these last few days when he is upset when I try to put him down for a day sleep it hasnt been so bad. As in, I havent let it get to me...and boy does it make it easier!!

Cheers

Michelle

[rynosmum]

My DS used to hate his day sleeps too so I started letting him have them in the lounge room in his rocker. He used to just doze off when he was ready and because I was in the same room, didn't freak out at all. I gave him a dummy for day sleeps which he'd spit out as soon as he dozed off.

When he became older and more mobile, I had to convert him to the cot which wasn't really such a bad transition.

He never had his dummy at night as I didn't want to have to keep getting up for it and unless he's sick, he never actually wants it at night. Strange. :confused:

[rebeccamum]

My daugther is exactly the same! Since she was born (she's now 2 months old) there's only 2 or 3 days that she had long hours sleep during the day. She only goes to sleep for about 20-30 mins, 40 mins top and wakes up pretty grumpy. Putting her to sleep at night is a little difficult but once she falls asleep, she'll sleep for about 4-5 hours straight. She wakes up for her night feeds after first 4-5 hours and then gets up every 2 hours until 7am. I hope she'll sleep longer soon because I hate getting up every 2 hours after midnight (I'm usually deadly sleepy after midnight).

She sleeps in a hammock at night and sleeps in a bassinet during the day, so I guess she knows they difference between night and day. I've tried to put her to sleep in a hammock like it's nighttime but she resists it. The hammock is in my bedroom upstair so I can't bring it down and I am mostly downstair during the day. I pat her and wheel the bassinet all over the house for about good 15 mins and my back kills me...she dozes off for a few mins then starts to move her arms and BAM, eyes wide open! Gosh...it's so frustrating and I can sympathize with you. I also tried every method in the books but nothing works. Sometimes I wonder why those magical methods work on some babies but doesn't work on mine!

Here's what I read from Robin Barker's Baby Love, just to let you know that there's nothing wrong with you son:

" A number of babies never sleep soundly for 3 to 4 hours at a time (insert my thought* but why do I keep hearing from people that their babies do?). After 20 mins they strech luxuriously and become instantly alert as if waking from 8 hours' sleep! Many babies can be taught to sleep through the night after 6 months (Thanks god so there'll be light at the end of the tunnel for me, right?), but I have never found a way to 'make' babies who don't sleep much in the day sleep more or longer (oh oh...) If you baby catnaps and is otherwise reasonably content and feeding well it's best to accept the fact that her daytime sleeps will be short and frequent rather than longer and fewer. Trying to resettle babies who catnap after the wake is difficult and needs a lot of persistence as well as being able to tolerate a fair amount of crying (I simply can't), with every likelihood nothing is going to change. Most mothers decide it's a pointless exercise (Yup!). Babies who catnap usually sleep well at night (there we go!)."

I hope this makes you feel better, well it does make me feel a bit better to know that it's not because I'm doing something wrong, and that I'm not a failure if the sleep method doesn't work on my baby. :)

[rynosmum]

Hi Rebeccamum,

You are never a failure if your baby doesn't sleep the way that you expect it to. All bubs are different, the same way as adults have different needs and personalities, so do our babies. By all means, try different routines and methods - some may work as your child gets older and goes through different stages but I guess be ready in case your bub just doesn't want to go to sleep during the day.

Best of luck with whatever course it takes ! :D

[Crazy Monkey]

My DS has never really like sleeping during the day... From a newborn he wouldn't sleep much during the day, unless he was being held and then it would still only be about 20 minutes... I found that trying to put him to sleep in his cot when he is not half asleep was near impossible...

A couple of weeks ago, things changed and he is now sleeping a little during the day, putting himself to sleep and is generally a happier baby... I don't know what happened as I didn't change anything...

It all gets better as time goes by... And just when you think you have a routine all set, they change it... I am waiting for the next change (and with immunisation next week, I am sure thats when it will happen)

Cheers

[SarahStevens]

I know Exactly what you are going through. My baby boy is now 3 1/2 months old and he has been capnapping during the day since he was 6 weeks old. I read numerous things about day time sleeping and found that he is just a capnapper and there are alot of babies like this. He will have 3-5 30min naps during the day and that is what I have learned to live with otherwise you are just forcing them to sleep when they don't want to and you do your head in worrying about it at the same time. He sleeps great at night so that is one benefit of a capnapper. I learn to do everything I need to do around the house now in those 30minute slots. I've been told me might sleep more during the day when he becomes more mobile and makes himself more tired.

Goodluck... Just wanted to let you know that you are not the only one!!!

[Tizi]

My DS is 7wks old and the only way I can get him to sleep during the day is to either sleep in my arms or put him in his sling. The sling is great, it works every single time and I can still do things around the house while he's sleeping.

[FluffyDucks]

" A number of babies never sleep soundly for 3 to 4 hours at a time (insert my thought* but why do I keep hearing from people that their babies do?). After 20 mins they strech luxuriously and become instantly alert as if waking from 8 hours' sleep! Many babies can be taught to sleep through the night after 6 months (Thanks god so there'll be light at the end of the tunnel for me, right?), but I have never found a way to 'make' babies who don't sleep much in the day sleep more or longer (oh oh...) If you baby catnaps and is otherwise reasonably content and feeding well it's best to accept the fact that her daytime sleeps will be short and frequent rather than longer and fewer. Trying to resettle babies who catnap after the wake is difficult and needs a lot of persistence as well as being able to tolerate a fair amount of crying (I simply can't), with every likelihood nothing is going to change. Most mothers decide it's a pointless exercise (Yup!). Babies who catnap usually sleep well at night (there we go!)."

I hope this makes you feel better, well it does make me feel a bit better to know that it's not because I'm doing something wrong, and that I'm not a failure if the sleep method doesn't work on my baby. :)

And actually it DOES make me feel better! Especially all the posts that other people experience the same thing.

So I guess I have a catnapper on my hands eh? Well at least I can use the half hours I get during the day to chat on Bub Hub! :)

Michelle

[Heids]

Hiya Michelle,

There is a PDF file you can buy off www.saveoursleep.com for catnappers, I have bought the one for 8-16 weeks so it wouldn't be to much help for you :(

I tried the method today which went like this......Cried for 5 mins then I went in avoided eye contact, turned him on his side and patted him on the back ( he stopped straight away ), I left......then after a few mins he started again and I let him cry for 5 mins and went in again and patted and he stopped after 2 mins, I left..... he cried again for 5 mins I went in and patted his back for a bit longer after he stopped crying and he was off to dreamland. This took me 28 mins and he slept for 84mins.

I have left him in his chair not swinging for his afternoon nap and he went straight to sleep after playtime without my help !!! ( shock.. its a first for this week )

My dh and I are going to do again tonight if need, be as last night we put him down at 7pm and he didn't go to sleep till 11.30pm !

I understand if you are into the no crying method (as was I and dh ) but due to the circumstances we have now resorted to this.

Heids :rolleyes:

[mmp]

Was great to read everyone's experiences on this as my darling little girl has justed started doing the same thing. She is 7 weeks old and doesn't like to sleep during the day and in the evening I struggle to get her to sleep. Last night I gave her a dummy about 10pm and she fell asleep and stayed alseep. During the day she catnaps and then is cranky cos she's still tired and only quitens down when held. I don't mind if she doesn't sleep but it's hard to handle her crying at these times and olding her all the time isn't really going to work. Any thoughts?

[Heids]

My son was always grumpy till I started making him sleep during the day ( now play times I am getting lots of smiles, giggles and tummy time )

He hasn't learnt to self settle yet but we are making progress.

I put him down after the tired signs come on.. say good night, then I let him cry for 5 mins.. go in and turn him on his side and pat him on the bum and he's off to fairyland in about 2 mins - sometimes I pat longer to about 8 mins.

This morning he looked very tired so I just put him on his side , gave him a pat and it worked... took about 4/5mins.. no crying ! He slept for 1hr 20 mins.

He has been have 2 long sleeps in the day since I started on Thurs last week and 1 nap.

Will update you and let you know how long it takes for him to do it himself.

Heids

[An2net]

yay! So glad I found this website. I feel so much better about my 3-mth old and his catnapping during the day (he only goes down for 30mins max. twice a day!!). We put him down for the night about 7.30pm but we have to rock/soothe him to sleep for about 15 mins first. Then he gets up about 1am and again about 5am to feed. Hence, the question is: When can I stop the night feeds? is he really hungry at these times or just needing to re-settle? I can't tell the difference in his cries/whinge. Thoughts anyone?

An2net

[georgiesmum]

My daugther is exactly the same! Since she was born (she's now 2 months old) there's only 2 or 3 days that she had long hours sleep during the day. She only goes to sleep for about 20-30 mins, 40 mins top and wakes up pretty grumpy. Putting her to sleep at night is a little difficult but once she falls asleep, she'll sleep for about 4-5 hours straight. She wakes up for her night feeds after first 4-5 hours and then gets up every 2 hours until 7am. I hope she'll sleep longer soon because I hate getting up every 2 hours after midnight (I'm usually deadly sleepy after midnight).

She sleeps in a hammock at night and sleeps in a bassinet during the day, so I guess she knows they difference between night and day. I've tried to put her to sleep in a hammock like it's nighttime but she resists it. The hammock is in my bedroom upstair so I can't bring it down and I am mostly downstair during the day. I pat her and wheel the bassinet all over the house for about good 15 mins and my back kills me...she dozes off for a few mins then starts to move her arms and BAM, eyes wide open! Gosh...it's so frustrating and I can sympathize with you. I also tried every method in the books but nothing works. Sometimes I wonder why those magical methods work on some babies but doesn't work on mine!

Here's what I read from Robin Barker's Baby Love, just to let you know that there's nothing wrong with you son:

" A number of babies never sleep soundly for 3 to 4 hours at a time (insert my thought* but why do I keep hearing from people that their babies do?). After 20 mins they strech luxuriously and become instantly alert as if waking from 8 hours' sleep! Many babies can be taught to sleep through the night after 6 months (Thanks god so there'll be light at the end of the tunnel for me, right?), but I have never found a way to 'make' babies who don't sleep much in the day sleep more or longer (oh oh...) If you baby catnaps and is otherwise reasonably content and feeding well it's best to accept the fact that her daytime sleeps will be short and frequent rather than longer and fewer. Trying to resettle babies who catnap after the wake is difficult and needs a lot of persistence as well as being able to tolerate a fair amount of crying (I simply can't), with every likelihood nothing is going to change. Most mothers decide it's a pointless exercise (Yup!). Babies who catnap usually sleep well at night (there we go!)."

I hope this makes you feel better, well it does make me feel a bit better to know that it's not because I'm doing something wrong, and that I'm not a failure if the sleep method doesn't work on my baby. :)
I can sympathise with you on this one. The only advice I can offer is to swaddle your baby before going to sleep - this will at least help the swinging arms! Sometimes the startle reflex wakes them up and makes it impossible for them to get back to sleep. I found that swaddling my little girl each time stops this, as well as doing the same routine each time before I put her down for a sleep. That is, wrap her and put her in her bassinet. I used to put her in her cot during the day and her bassinet at night but I think it was too confusing for her. She has responded much better to a distinct routine before sleeptimes. I recommend those Swaddle Me wraps - you can get them off Ebay and in baby stores. They are impossible for the baby to wriggle out of!