AAAAK!!!! The ex is coming to visit!!

[*munchkin*]

AAAAAAKKKKKK!!!!! Help me ladies (and gents?)!!!! The ex is coming to visit :eek: :eek: It's been 2 months since he left.

I keep telling myself it is good for DD, but I'm just pooping my pants now. It's my own fault - I called him last week to talk about legal stuff, and when he said "I think of you both every minute of every day" (:barf: ), I said "You have no idea what you're missing out on. You're all talk, no action". Next thing I know, he's coming to visit before he goes to Coober Pedy (oh yes....he's been at ex wife and DS house for the 2 months since he left, so still hasn't made it to Coober Pedy - supposedly the reason he left....burkkk...don't start me or this thread will be 20 pages long :mad: ).

I didn't believe he's actually coming. I don't know what to do. He arrives tomorrow. EEEEEEKKKKK!!! I'm thinking, maybe leave DD with him, and try to relax by going shopping, to the movies etc. Will be super hard, as he will have no idea how to take care of her now. But...I just need to let go for a couple of days I guess.

Small vent...he said he's "Super excited, and can't WAIT to see us both". What is wrong with the man???????? How can you leave to move to the other end of the country, then say you miss us every single day?????? Grrrrrr...

Just need some support...I'm shaking...

[Chanelc]

Sounds like a lot of emotions running in you no surprises!
Not sure what to say except big :hugs: and hope it goes well.
I think your suggestion to go out while he is there is a good idea give you a break and him time to bond with the little one - but only if you feel comfortable. Keep us posted how it goes.
Thinking of you...

[wattle]

Oh no Munchkin. Sounds like it's going to be a painful visit. Shopping is a great idea, or a coffee with a girlfriend who doesn't mind listening to you rave on a bit. :yes:

Sending you a big :hugs: .

[Snuffys Mum]

I'd be freaking out too! I haven't seen my ex since we split 10 months ago (he's never seen ds) and I really don't know how I'd react to seeing him now. I think coffee with a girlfriend sounds like a good idea, you might be less likely to get yourself worked up if theres someone there to vent to lol!

Good luck!!

[biscotti]

Oh Munchkin, oh dear - just wanted to give you this :hugs:

Here have another one :hugs:

Noosamum xx

[mum_I'm_hungry]

Be strong! You've come so far -- no point in turning back now! :yes: :)

[Briannabear]

Big hugs. :hugs: Keep strong! Hope it goes ok for you and your DD. :yes:

[♥My Innocent Angel♥]

Hugs Hun :hugs:

I know excactly how you are feeling I just recieved a phone call from my ex telling me he is in the state till thurs night OMG im so **** scared he wanted me to meet him but i told him he had to come here as DD has daycare and its to much for her

So i understand the fear and thoughts and :eek: ness about it

hope you handle it well and remember we are all here for you

[Chanelc]

How did it go? Hope it went ok

[OneBabyBoy]

omg he never actually went to coober pedy? That man is something else!!!
How did everything go with the visit munchkin?

[motherlylove]

or at the park where you an supervise if you are worried he cant look after heard sit don the other end so you can still see them but dont have to talk to him...maybe with a good book

[BlueEyedGirl]

Hey Munchkin,

:eek: After all the "kerfuffle" he hasn't actually gone to CP yet???

How did the visit go??

[*munchkin*]

Thanks for the support everyone. The visit went surprisingly ok. I was very anxious the night before, and didn't sleep much. He came over at 6.30am :eek: on Tuesday morning. And...I was ok. Just kept on talking, my usual self-defence mechanism! I let him stay here with her, and I did some chores and shopping etc. On Tuesday and Wednesday night I left him here to babysit, and I went out to the movies and to dinner with my great support network of friends, which felt so amazing after months at home each night!

I surprised myself with how well I coped. I realise that I have finally given up trying to understand him, which helps reduce my frustration levels. I don't think I have it in me to dislike him, even though I should after his bastardly actions. So that's all good for DD if she doesn't have a bitter mum.

He was so great with her as well. I was quite surprised. She looked at him like "Who the hell are you" for the first hour or two, then didn't stop smiling and laughing at him the rest of the time he was here. It was almost like she knew him somehow. Wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it.

Aaaaanyway...now he is FINALLY FINALLY off to Coober Pedy. At last. :yelclap: for him. He has a job working at a mine which is 90kms out of CP. :laughing: Truly the backside of the *ss end of Australia!

[shed]

good.

do you think motherhood has mellowed you?

[Chanelc]

So glad to hear it went well... amazing how time heals the hurt and bitterness.

[*munchkin*]

Hmmmm...no, don't think motherhood has mellowed me as such. I've worked really hard to get through all of this and progress in a healthy mindset, so I think all of that has paid off.

[shed]

That's great.

I hope it continues to go well for DD's sake. And for your sake too.

[Femme-Fetale]

Im so glad it all went well *munchkin*
Hopefully the next time he visits, you can go out and be free for a little while again! YAY for you! :thumbsup:

[*munchkin*]

Yes - at least it puts a positive spin on his visits! I can go out and see a movie. AT night. With adults!