What would you do???In two minds...

[Veritas]

Ok, so I've made the decision to return to a sport I played a few years ago in an effort to do something just for me.... the catch is that my ex also plays for the same club....

My ex made the decision not to have anything to do with bub, and has not even met her... he has even "prevented" his family from getting to know her.... returning to the club means that I will definitely have to see him and his family, which brings a certain level of awkwardness.... he is too gutless for there to be any level of confrontation at least....

I am in two minds as to whether to just show up, do my thing and let him work it out, or whether I should let him know I will be playing to help us both to avoid the awkward situation....

What would you do??

[kirstenriley]

To be honest, i would probably go play for another club??

[Dadandtwo]

You don't say whether you actually get on OK with the ex's family or not, or at least did before you broke up (or whether you actually would like for them to see the bub?). Or whether or not there's another club close by. But from I read so far, I would still play with the club. You've got to live your life.

[Veritas]

D & 2 - I didn't get along with them too well prior to our break up and they weren't too happy to start with about bubba... I have since sent them cards and letters to clear the air and things are a definitely better... his sister painted a picture of me that was far from the truth which is why things were sour to begin with.... I would love for them to be involved in bubs life, and have been trying very hard to make it happen without pushing too hard IYKWIM!

Kirsten - My sister and friends play for this club, and I previously played for them for 5 yrs.... its like a family to me... very social sport.... so another club is not an option... besides the fact as D&2 said, its my life and I'm not going to let him dictate what I can and can't do....

Basically is it courtesy for me to give him a heads up, or should I not worry???? I daresay he will hear on the ever reliable grape vine anyway... lol

[lovingmotheract]

just show up, do your thing and let him work it out after all you are a grown woman and you don't have to tell him a thing

[Kassiasmum]

I wouldn't let him know, he doesn't deserve the courtesy with the way he has treated you and bubs.

[Dadandtwo]

Yes, agree. No need to let him/them know you're turning up. I certainly wouldn't if it were me.

[Pobblebonk]

If it were me, I'd go play at the club and not even acknowledge his existence. It's just as much YOUR club as his and why should you change any aspect of your life to accomodate his?

Anyway, it might be good for your ex's family to 'bump' into bubba, it might make them realise what they're missing out on.

[BlueEyedGirl]

I wouldn't even bother telling him.

As you said, you need to live your life, and why should you stop going somewhere just cause he is there.

[BlueEyedGirl]

Anyway, it might be good for your ex's family to 'bump' into bubba, it might make them realise what they're missing out on.

Thats a very good point miss_alitz.

[Jinglebells]

I would just go, and not say anything to him, if he doesn't want anything to do with you guys, why should you inform him of what your going to do, and it may give his family a wake up call seeing you and seeing that your doing so well with your DD

[kirstenriley]

Well then considering your sister and friends etc are there, you will have heaps of support so i say do whatever makes it easier and more comfortable for YOU.

[OneBabyBoy]

I agree with everyone else, don't tell him. Why does he deserve notice? Just turn up and let him be shocked and awkward and you can be confident. Smile and laugh lots and let him see that you are happy without him. :hugs:

[1st-timer@34]

I would just show up and do my own thing, why should you have to change anything for him.

[Mum2Bug]

I agree with the others. Just turn up, dont give him warning. He hasnt bothered to show you any courtesy lately so why bother showing him any? He doesnt deserve it!

And i agree with miss_alitz, it would be good for his family to bump into you and bubba in a social surrounding. it gives his family a chance to make the decision about seeing Bub firsthand.

[Femme-Fetale]

Ok, so I've made the decision to return to a sport I played a few years ago in an effort to do something just for me.... the catch is that my ex also plays for the same club....

My ex made the decision not to have anything to do with bub, and has not even met her... he has even "prevented" his family from getting to know her.... returning to the club means that I will definitely have to see him and his family, which brings a certain level of awkwardness.... he is too gutless for there to be any level of confrontation at least....

I am in two minds as to whether to just show up, do my thing and let him work it out, or whether I should let him know I will be playing to help us both to avoid the awkward situation....

What would you do??

I would go. Stuff him. He made his choice, fine, but you shouldnt let him ruin the rest of your life and hobbies. If you want to play, then play, and lets just hope if HE has the problem with it, he sees it fit to leave himself, or just shut up and get on with the task at hand -the game!!!

[Chanelc]

Go for it.
He never had an interested in your bub so don' let him dicate your life. If you want to play then play
Just think you can now ignore him just like he ignores you & the bub's!
Enjoy life we only live once