Occupying 3 yo while breastfeeding newborn

[becstar]

I have a 7 week old baby and my 3 year old drives me insane while I am breastfeeding and settling. Just as I have almost got bubs off to sleep Mr 3 comes charging in screaming and wakes him up. Asking him to keep quiet does not help, it makes him worse.

Any ideas on activities that I can get him to do on his own, without my help? He doesn't like independant play much, so keeps hassling me. What can I do to keep him occupied and keep me sane and bubs from getting overtired?

Thanks, please help!
Bec

[OM]

I have an almost 2 year old and I get him to draw or bring me books to read to him - don't know if that's any help though as there is a big difference in what will occupy a 2 year old than a 3 year old.

[Seekrit]

not the same age, but when I'm taking my 5 year old nephew out, I carry a colouring in book and pencils for the parents room occasions. :) Maybe you could have a special colouring in book that gets pulled out for breastfeeding time?

[tickle]

Not advisable, but when I got really desperate I would bribe my DS or use TV.:o
Usually I would get him to do me 'special' mum jobs that he only did when I was feeding or trying to get my DD to sleep. Putting clothes in draws (he loves doing this), or playing with something that I don't normally let him play with. Sounds boring, but if you find something special that's restricted to times when you're feeding it's easier to convince them to do it than the same old stuff they do all the time. I found that it was really difficult to get my DD to feed and sleep if my DS was right there next to us, so I tried to find things that were a little further away from us.

HTH

[jkate]

Ds1 was 2 1/2 when DS2 was born, and I found puzzles were the best thing. He loves them, and had a couple of new ones that I put away till DS2 was born, so it made it more exciting.

I think you just have to find what they love doing the most and have that activity there - if its practical. HTH's

[becstar]

He isn't really into colouring in yet - I have to colour with him to keep him interested and even then it doesnt last long.....

As for reading, is a nice idea but I am an awkward breastfeeder and need both hands which leaves me unable to hold a book and turn the pages. I could get DS to hold the book but he isn't really good at turning the pages in order yet.....:rolleyes:

Thanks for the suggestions keep them coming!:thumbsup: Theres got to be something that works!!

[becstar]

Not advisable, but when I got really desperate I would bribe my DS or use TV.:o
Usually I would get him to do me 'special' mum jobs that he only did when I was feeding or trying to get my DD to sleep. Putting clothes in draws (he loves doing this), or playing with something that I don't normally let him play with. Sounds boring, but if you find something special that's restricted to times when you're feeding it's easier to convince them to do it than the same old stuff they do all the time. I found that it was really difficult to get my DD to feed and sleep if my DS was right there next to us, so I tried to find things that were a little further away from us.

HTH

I use the TV a little too often (ooopps did I admit to that:D) but it doesn't really keep him occupied while I am feeding anyway....he still wants my attention.

I might try and get a special box of things that he can play with while I am feeding and settling. Problem is how do I convince him to give them back to me when I am finished without tantrums being thrown? lol.

[becstar]

Ds1 was 2 1/2 when DS2 was born, and I found puzzles were the best thing. He loves them, and had a couple of new ones that I put away till DS2 was born, so it made it more exciting.

I think you just have to find what they love doing the most and have that activity there - if its practical. HTH's

Puzzles, he hates them. Doesn't have enough patience. What does he like? hmm...... well he loves cooking (with me!!) and loves playing imagination games (with me!!) and loves playing with his trains......um.....(with me.....oh dear.)

I have created a monster haven't I? He doesnt like to play by himself....have I spoilt him too much. Hmmmm.

[~Emmylou~]

My DD is the same - totally incapable of amusing herself so we've had major problems with this as well.

I hate to admit it but I've had to resort to DVD's when I'm trying to get DS to sleep. She loves to get into our bed so I let her get in under the covers, turn the airconditioning on in our room and put on Finding Nemo and that will usually buy me 15 minutes to get DS to sleep during the day.
If I don't do this DS ends up catnapping all day downstairs in his bouncer and it's not fair to him that he doesn't get good quality sleep in his own bed. So as far as I see it I'm just taking the lesser of two evils even though I don't like it.
She's too little to understand that she has to be quiet and at just on two, I don't think it's fair to expect her to tiptoe around the baby's sleep times anyway since he sleeps so much.
It's really hard work trying to find what works with two little ones!
Oh the other thing that works for her is to feed her a snack while I'm feeding LOL.

If it's any consolation it does get easier - he'll probably go through a phase of creating havoc just cos he knows he can but after that my DD has settled down a lot in the last few weeks now that baby is not a novelty anymore and she's used to him being around. Good luck with it.

[k2ma]

Not advisable, but when I got really desperate I would bribe my DS or use TV.
HTH

I don't see anything wrong with 'bribing' (you could call it negotiating or task and reward so it sounds less negative!!:D) or using TV as a reward/distraction tool as long as it is appropriate for the child's age and is not something that they mindlessly sit in front of. If you select a DVD that is designed for kids and has short cartoons or features on it, it can be used as a learning tool. It can be kept for only breastfeeding time or only settling baby time...just because it is on does not mean it has to be on all the time, or indeed at each feeding time.

Maybe if you make the time immediately after the feeding / settling an occasion where you do something that the older child want to do?

My mother constantly advises 'peace before prinicples' (!!) where you really need them to be occupied or quiet. So if a DVD works for you, then use it!