stopped smiling??

[bec05]

Hi all

My baby girl is 12 weeks and used to smile and 'talk' all the time, but for some reason she has just stopped and I'm really worried what might be wrong. She seems to prefer looking at her hands or batting at hanging toys than looking at me. Sometimes she won't look at me at all and if she does it tends to be a stare rather than a smile - and she does not 'talk' anymore either. We had a bad couple of weeks recently with reflux and lots of screaming and not feeding properly, but she's much better now and no longer seems to be in any pain - so why does she seem so unhappy??? Has this happened to anyone else? It is really worrying me as I love her so much and not getting any smiles or response from her I can't help feeling rejected!!! (she is more or less the same with my partner, and even strangers don't get much of a smile whereas she used to have whole 'conversations' with anyone who'd talk to her)

[annsam]

Hi Bec, At 12 weeks they do a huge jump in their awareness. Shes no doubt just taking in all thats around her. If shes stopped smiling at your funny faces etc its probably just because shes noticed there are things behind you over your shoulder or something. I wouldn't be at all concerned, shes just learning about her environment (including her hands ;) soon it will be her feet).

[Melski]

Hiya,

My boy seemingly lost some some of his 'zing' for life right at this age as well and became quite a serious little poppet for about a week or two. I was terribly concerned and all sorts of terrible thoughts went through my head. I took him for a checkup but the Dr thought I was mad as he had no physical symptoms.

After a short time he went back to his happy self. i am a big believer that these development 'shifts' that occur at different ages (inc 3 months) where suddenly their perception of the world changes do alter personality for a period of time but then it comes back and all is well again.

If it goes on for more than a couple of weeks and you are still concerned, meybe speak to someone about it, otherwise try not to worry!

cheers, Mel

[TLCC]

I agree, that its most likely that she has found his hands and is working out they are connected to her body and she can use them to hit things like his mobile etc. They all go through different stages and she is probably just busy taking it all in and doesn't have time to talk..too much to look at.

My DD has found recently she can extend her hand out and scratch it with the other hand. We have been trying like mad to see if she has hurt it and thats why she puts it out in such a strange way, but have found nothing there and she just likes the feeling...

they are strange little critters sometimes but its such a joy to watch them develop. Its amazing what they have to learn, you take things for granted that they are just known but they teach you that there are always new things to discover.

[HoopDeeDoo]

I think they are just learning and taking in so much that once they discover something new they forget the other things. It's like when they learn new sounds and will be saying da da and then all of a sudden they stop saying da da because they can say ba ba. It can be really embarrising if your telling someone about what they are doing and then they won't do it :)

[bec05]

Thank you, you've all made me feel a lot better, and I'm trying to just relax and let her be what she wants to be!!! (maybe trying too hard to get her to smile and talk was part of the problem - I'd probably be thinking 'would this clown go away and leave me in peace!' too). I guess it's just that all the books say things like 'you'll still be her favourite plaything' so when you're not it makes you wonder what's wrong... with you or with her. And a few not-so-great days (whether crying or not smiling or whatever) can seem like an eternity rather than just something temporary. Here's hoping!

[sasholi]

Hi Bec.

It sounds perfectly normal to me. My bubs did about the same thing around the same time. He is such a happy little chappy again now though!!!

I think they suddenly get these great bursts of new awareness and it is probably a little overwhelming and simply new for them. So sometimes they are happy to just sit back and absorb. I remember I could NEVER get bubs to look at me. It's much better now that he recognises his own name and loves playing peek a boo. But it was pretty much hit and miss for a while.

I guess bubs sees mum all the time (specially if a stay at home mum!) and so mum just isn't that interesting any more...! The world is a big new place!

Always remember, each stage does not last forever...

[giggles]

Wow! My Ava has done the same thing and for the past few days I have been thinking the same "Why isn't she talking with me anymore?"

Makes sense though, so much to concentrate on now that they have these things at the end of their arms to use!