View Full Version : Terrified about VBAC
I'm desperately wanting a VBAC, but I'm terrified about the pain of contractions and birth! I know these are probably very normal feelings, but I really want to avoid another c-section at all costs (if possible) as we want a large family and I don't want th enumber of children I have to be limited by the number of c-sections I've had.
Can anyone suggest any excercises (physical and mental) that would help me to limber up and mentally prepare myself. I can't wait for the experience, and really am looking forward to helping 'freckle' into the world, being able to hold them straigt away, being able to have them in the ward with me, BF straight away.
I'm only 'just' pg... so you'll probably see me around a bit reading every one's birth stories and questions.
Sorry i havent got great advice im sure our wonderful Becca will be along to help you out !
Just wanted to say being scared is normal its how you harness that energy that matters :hugs:
Go with what is right for you dont be bullied into another c/s if its not what you want or doesnt feel right but also dont stress yourself if you feel you cant handle a vb.
Mothers instincts are usually right so go with it !
Good luck you are due around the same time as me lol while im not having a VBAC i had a very bad experience last time & im petrified so we can hold each others hand even over the net :hugs:
I was afraid of birth after my 1st VBAC, purely because I was afraid of tearing (the labour had been ok) as I grazed and had a humiliating experience with it :o
This attitude totally took an about face after I did some research on having a better birth. The first book I read which gave me the :idea: was Grantley D ick-Reads "Childbirth without Fear". It talks about the fear-tension-pain syndrome, and how to avoid it. It really worked well for me :yes: I borrowed this at the local library so read it for free .
I strongly suggest doing some reading, as that is what worked for me. In the library, you should also find books by Michel Odent and Sheila Kitzinger, who help to dispel the fear around the birth experience.
Also, if you can get your hands on Ina May Gaskin's "Ina May's Guide to Childbirth" and Dr Sarah J Buckley's "Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering"....
And the book which helped me extremely well when preparing for my HBA2C was "Birthing from Within" by Pam England. This was invaluable!
The other thing I did to prepare was hypnobirthing CDs, and positive affirmations, which I would say a few times a day, and tried to always say them just before going to bed.
Also, surround yourself with positive birth stories (google "positive birth stories" or "easy birth stories") and totally brainwash yourself with positivity. It really, really worked for me!
I have to say, I am a birth junkie now.....I am absolutely addicted to giving birth :laughing:
Honey, I know how you feel. I recently had a VBAC, and it was so amazing. I was induced, had a 12 hr labour (contractions 3 mins apart from the word go), and ended up in a c section with my 1st birth. It was horrible. My 2nd birth, amazing, contractions were so much more tolerable. Nowhere near the amount of pain that I was in with a c section.
Just remember, your body was made to do this, you can do it!!!
Your fears are totally valid and not uncommon for women who've experienced previous surgery. It's really important to talk about your feelings and process them, so that you can best prepare and get into a positive, confident frame of mind for your upcoming birth. Positive affirmations can be really helpful- perhaps try post-it notes stuck in places you'll see them easily, with phrases like 'I will birth my baby beautifully',' My body and baby will work together perfectly' ,'My baby will come in her own sweet time' and 'My cervix will be ripe and open'. It's
amazing the effect positive words can have! Also perhaps join a support group of women who've had previous C-secs (I will PM you now with the details of one), and arm yourself with a fantastic, detailed birth plan and a care provider you trust and connect with.
I would read "New Active Birth" by Janet Balaskas, and any other books about active/natural births you can get your hands on. Even if you dont intend to have no drugs birth or whatever I think its better to read books from that perspective as they tell you the real deal about interventions and how they affect labour and birth and the health of you and your baby.
The Janet Balaskas book has lots of great postures and yoga excercises to practice during your pregnancy, I did them and found them great and then used some of those positions in labour.
Its sooo normal to have fears about your labour/birth and how you will cope. We all have them. I guess you should just look at it this way...it will be a challenge no matter how quick/easy/straight forward it is....or how long/ traumataic/difficult it is. But you will be in the moment and what you think you couldnt possibly cope with now you will be amazed what you can cope with IYKWIM.
I'm scared as well!
Not only will I have to somewhat "fight" for the birth I REALLY want (and fight to AVOID the birth I hate - caesarean!), but I'm also faced with the unknown - vaginal birth, contractions... all of it.
I feel like it'll be a "first time mother" type of birth... but with more hurdles for me to jump over.
Still, being scared is kinda good, IMO, because it means I'm going to prepare myself so much more than if I weren't scared. If I weren't scared, I'd just go in there and "hope for the best." However, being scared means I can read up on things to help everything run so much more smoothly and put them into practice when I need them.
One thing I'm scared of is uterine rupture (I don't even like anyone touching my scar... and although when a uterus ruptures you can't see it, I always invision my whole stomach tearing open! :eek: ). I'm also freaked out about tearing... so I'm just going massage "down there" and get some vaginal weights before I actually fall pregnant (to strengthen all the muscles).
I'm also scared about NOT having a VBAC and having my dreams knocked back once again... but I'm determined to not be so passive next time... I'm determined to stand up for myself and make my opinion matter.
I'm ALSO freaked out about natural birth. I'm not going to go COMPLETELY natural, but I'd prefer to avoid ANY drugs or anything if possible. I'm definately not having an epidural... I'd rather suck up and deal with the pain than miss out on a VBAC and regret it later.
I have a couple of natural birth books that you can have if you pay postage. I think one of them is that new active birth. Someone gave them to me when I was looking into vbac, would love to return the favour. Pm me if you want them - I wont be able to post them till after the new year though - steering clear of the shops till then!!
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