Do you find it harder at x-mas?

[Kaileysmum]

My mum died of cancer almost 3 years ago, it was very sudden and she died within a month of being diagnosed. I coped with it fairly well, but Id have to say I find x-mas the hardest time, as for her last x-mas alive I didnt spend it with her, as I spent it with dp's family. I remember her saying "its fine we'll do x-mas together next year", then a month later she got diagnosed. then a month after that she passed. I really just hate this time of year, as I get so sad.
Does anyone else find this the hardest time of year?

[Ana Gram]

Xmas and any other celebration times are always difficult. It's not like you can pretend that you have forgotten what day it is like you can with birthdays. The whole day is a celebration and it can be a huge reminder as to who isn't there to celebrate with you. Can be very depressing.

[melfunction]

Exactly what chelle said.

[angcaltam]

Thank goodness it's not just me ! ! !

I only lost my Mum to Cancer last year at the start of Dec.:crying: She had Cancer and died within a few months of finding out that she had it. We had organised for our whole family to have Xmas at Mum's last year because we knew it was going to be her last, but she didn't make it. I still kept to my end of the deal and had Xmas with who was left at Dad's, but my 2 brothers didn't see the point. :shame: That hurt me.

This Xmas we are staying here to have Xmas with the In-Laws because DH's sister and brother will be home for it for the first time since well, before any of my kids came along. We are off to my Dad's this weekend to have an early Xmas with him and some of my sister's and brother's.

But I have been getting really down the last couple of weeks and I'm not sure if it is just because it was the anniversary of her death and now Xmas, or if maybe I might have PND ! ! ! Should I just wait and see how I go over Xmas or should I maybe go and see my GP ? ? ?:confused:

Thanks for starting up this thread, I think it is going to help a lot of people to cope ! ! !:fingerscrossed:

[Kaileysmum]

But I have been getting really down the last couple of weeks and I'm not sure if it is just because it was the anniversary of her death and now Xmas, or if maybe I might have PND ! ! ! Should I just wait and see how I go over Xmas or should I maybe go and see my GP ? ? ?:confused:



Oh Ive been feeling the same for the last month, Im getting teary all the time, cry about silly things, and getting really frustrated with my dd easily. I wasnt sure if it was a mix of things like my brother deploying to timor (his first deplyment in the army), x-mas coming, and the anniversary of mums death coming. Or maybe I had developed some sort of depression (or PND). I was saying to dp maybe I need to go see my GP, he just thinks it'll pass. Arhh its so frustrating though. Anyways If you need to chat please PM me, it would be nice to talk to someone who's going through similar things.

[Kizmet]

:hugs: to all, I can sort of relate as christmas is heartbreaking for me now that i am married and living wit my usband and DD as my father passed when i was quite young and every year on xmas eve my mum sits alone and cries. So to try and combat that we have organised a dinner here but i know what will happen when she goes home. I just dnt know how to fix it. I know I cant but i feel so terrible. On another note christmas is upsetting for me because I have 5 generations of women alive on my side DD, me, my mum, my nana, my grandma. My grandma is on a downhill decline as she will be 91 in feb and is in and out of hospital all the time and I think is holding on for DDs first christmas and hopefully birthday. As well as my nana has parkinsons and a brain tumour which are bot making her increasingly more stressed and unable to do things she used to do. Christmas has always been at nana's she was always made everything including puddings from scratch from a family recipe for everyone in the family. This year I made the puddings because she couldnt and christmas has been moved to my aunt's house for the first time. I feel like im grieving but they are still here IYKWIM. christmas is a time for so much joy but so much heartache. im so sorry if i just overtook the thread! :no:

[Blessed Mum]

yep it really is a bit of a struggle. I am trying very hard to cope & get by tho. This is DD's first christmas so I'd like to not feel too sad

[jkate]

My Grandmother died to cancer suddenly in July this year. The last Christmas I had with her was when DS1 was only 4 mths old. Since then we haven't been able to go home for Christmas due to DH working. Growing up we were always with my Grandmum at Christmas, one year it would be at her place the next it was at ours. So yeah its going to be hard, espically for my uncle who has lived with her all these years.

We are trying to get everyone to our place for Christmas but my brother is being torn by his in-laws. Fingers cross everything we work out, but we will all still notice she is not there. It has been hard writing the christmas cards, and only my uncles name down, I always used to send her a santa photo. I missed her.

Thank you for starting this thread. :hugs: Need anyone to cry with - send me a pm :)

[Jinglebells]

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: to everyone, this time of year is always hard, as the year ends we tend to reflect on the year/s that have been, I lost my first boy on the 29th of dec 2002, it will be comming up 4 years this year, I also should be heavily pregnant as I was due in Jan but we lost our wee boy in Sept this year, i'm trying to be happy for our little boy that is with us, but somedays it is hard, he's the one that keeps me going so I will do everything to make this xmas good for him

[Sharelle]

This is my first Christmas without my Mum.
She passed away quite suddenly (although she has been sick for a long time) on the 30th of July this year.:crying:

I am normally "Miss Christmas", I LOVE it. But its alot harded this year. DF had to ask me the other day if I was going to put the tree up and its normally up before december starts.:tree:

I am trying to stay positive and upbeat for the kids though as I don't think its fair for me to spoil their fun by being a big sadsack.:xmas: