How do u get the ring without asking??

[mummybunny]

Hello there girls :wave: how are we all??
now before i start i must warn i may sound selfish or snobish buti dont mean to...

I have a dileema that needs to be set at ease...
See hubby propsed to me back in jan/feb but without a ring and it was kind of unofficial but official if that makes sence, and now 10 months later and still no ring....
Im tired of waiting and seeing everyone else with their beautiful rings and getting married. Imean even a cheap $20 ring from Goldmark would do me atm thats how desperate i feel (not that there is anythig wrong with Goldmark just not my first choice).
We are now 10 weeks away from having our bub and i feel a little strange about having this bub out of wedlock, even though i was born out of wedlock and its not a big thing these days i always told my mother and father i wanted to married before having babies...
I kind of feel like ive cut myself a little short...
I mean im happy being with my hubby he is the love of my life and i could never imagine us apart but i feel like the time has come to take this to another level yet im the only one taking it there...
How do i get the ring without telling him thats what i want??
i know i sound so selfish dont i and to be honest i dont know why i am making such a big deal out of it because it hasnt really bothered me up untill now, yes i wanted to get married before babies but i knew we would one day but it just seems to be getting to me, and i dont want it to...
Does anyone have any suggestions?
Not only on how to get the ring but how to stop feeling and being so selfish...

[Chub Chub]

Be honest! I think dropping hints etc becomes tiresome and men sometimes find it hard to read between the lines.

Sit him down, tell him how important a symbol of his commitment is really important (emphasis it is not the size of the rock). Be straight up...if that doesn't work then I don't know!

Good luck.:thumbsup:

[subaruforestermum]

I get the jewellery catalogues and circle things I really like, and I dont pick the most expensive things either...... Then he picks something similar to what I have picked.....

Although we have talked about us getting married one day, and Im still waiting for a ring too.........so it hasnt worked for engagement rings for me, but has for other rings.......

Goodluck....

Or tell him, oh I fell in love with this gorgeous ring at.............. jewellers, and its only $***....or something along those lines....

[mummybunny]

thanx girls...
the thing i think that annoys me the most is taht we have only been together going on 11 months and we fell preg after 4 months and have been living together basicly since the day we met. Hubby proposed and we went ring shopping on our third date ( i know how desperate are we lol) but we knew that we couldnt spend a our lives with other ppl because we are ment to be togeter, Hubby even designed a ring for me, but here we are as i said almost 11 months on and still no ring... I just dont feel right..
Hopefully if the ring doesnt come soon this is just a nesting phase and ill get over it... But i hope he gets the hint soon that it would make me happy even if its not something fantcy...

[Bearskin]

Not trying to get your hopes up too much but maybe he's getting the ring made on the quiet and will give it to you after you have bubs? Maybe he thinks if you get having bubs over and done with and after the birth and everyone is settled in you can maybe focus on celebrating your engagement officially and planning a wedding?

Sometimes men can surprise us! DH tried to get my mum to steal my wedding band so he could size it and get an eternity ring made for me after having DD - very sweet except we ran out of money and 12 months later no ring :D

[AimeeB]

:thumbsup: I agree with Bearskin-maybe it's going to be a surprise!We had talked about getting married (obviously)but DH and I weren't engaged, when I was 8 months pg with our first (DS) he took me out for dinner on the anniversary of the day we met and proposed with a gorgeous diamond ring he designed and had made-I had NO idea.I'm just glad he has good taste.He had it hidden in the roof of the garage for 2 months!And let me say-if my DH was able to give me such a lovely surprise-any man can, and to think I thought he wasn't a romantic!


ME~28
DH~nearly 30:laughing:
DS#1~09/12/01~soon to be 5
DD1~16/09/03
DD2~12/10/05
DS2~EDD 22/03/07:smiliedance:

[defaipe]

im the opposite.. i would hate to get married while preg only coz i dont want people to look back and think it was a 'shot gun' wedding.. even though we're onto #3 :laughing:

i hope he suprises you too!

[ETsMum]

Tell him you'd like one for your Christmas present! :tree:

[aardvark]

thanx girls...
the thing i think that annoys me the most is taht we have only been together going on 11 months and we fell preg after 4 months and have been living together basicly since the day we met. Hubby proposed and we went ring shopping on our third date ( i know how desperate are we lol) but we knew that we couldnt spend a our lives with other ppl because we are ment to be togeter, Hubby even designed a ring for me, but here we are as i said almost 11 months on and still no ring... I just dont feel right..


Sound a bit like DH and I, right down to the delayed ring bit. We moved in together a few weeks after we met.

I did get a ring about 10 months after he proposed, very nice sapphire with 6 diamonds after my FIL gave DH money to buy it!

And we will have been married 19 years shortly. When it's right, it's right!

[mummybunny]

thanx girls... i hope that he suprises me too...
see its my birthday on christmas day and i asked him what he wanted for christmas, as he would be buying with me not working atm, and he said he might buy a bbq and im fine with that then i asked what he would be getting me for christmas and he said what would u like, me not think said a new aircon system lol and he said alright done then when i asked does that mean i dot get a bday present he said hmm dunno yet then i asked well whet will u get me? lol hints hints he then said its a surprise u will have to wait... i dont want to get my hopes up but maybe just maybe itll be the ring hehe...

[bekkyboo]

J and i met on the internet (a car club forum) He flew me here to meet him. We started dating 2 weeks later, and moved here 2 weeks after that. We were pregnant within the month :eek:

After some dicussion - I told him how important it was for me to have G with in a marriage - before that i never thought it would be. So it was this strange understanding without a proposal.

On valenitines this yr - He proposed. We were married 25th March when i was 28 weeks pg.

Things can move quick and still have happy endings. I couldnt imagin being happier.

As for advice on getting the ring - hints dont usually work with Males. You just need to be upfront and honest - without making it about the price or size - as some guys if they feel they cant provide you with what you want - it will send them into a nasty tail spin.

My engagement ring was a little pricey (but was bought through a payment scheme) But my wedding ring was $20 - to be replaced by a matching one when we have a formal wedding (we had a quicky registry wedding)...

Hope some of this helps!

[Little_Toad]

"Sweetheart would it be ok if we went ring shopping this weekend as it would be nice to formalize our engagement"

Just ask straight out. Then as a sweetner you could say "Or if you like we can do it after Xmas when the sales are on".

[EDIOH]

I just wish mine would propose. we have been together for almost 4 years, are buying a house together and TTC#1 and he still wont propose.
he always its out of lazyness and he will get around to it. He has been saying this for almost 2 years. i dont know what to do.

[spiritedfamily]

As for advice on getting the ring - hints dont usually work with Males. You just need to be upfront and honest - without making it about the price or size - as some guys if they feel they cant provide you with what you want - it will send them into a nasty tail spin

I agree...but it sounds like it would be wise to wait till after Christmas...just in case he has a surprise in store...you'd hate to spoil it and if not then ask him.

good luck:thumbsup:

[Pobblebonk]

Next time you're out shopping with him, why don't you go in and have a look at some rings?

That's how my best friend got her ring, and the engagement. She kept looking at rings and took her boyfriend with her and eventually he got the message. lol.

[cobysmummy]

im waiting for the engagement!!! lol.. i honestly dont care about the ring.. i would just love to get married and make our family a proper family...

we have been together 5 years, have almost 2 kids together and we talk about it, we know where we are having our wedding,.. he just wont let me plan it!!! i keep saying after the baby is born im gonna book and plan our wedding!!

i agree with just go do ur xmas shopping and look at rings and go ohh this is lovely,.. the shop assitants will hound u to try it on as they all do and try to persuade you to buy it and say what do u think hun... lol

or layby a ring and give him the reciept!! wouldnt work with my dp but might with urs.. the after xmas sale idea is good too...

sorry im not much help!

[JuniorMinime]

There are only so many hints and clues you can give and leave good luck though.

I asked my DF if he wanted to go and have a look at some rings so he knows what I like and then he can decide what he wants to get and surprise me. He was agreeable to that and it worked. He even got the exact ring that him and I liked.

I have my :fingerscrossed: for you.

[hippychick]

Unfortunatly for us,we are more complex than men.Thats why we find it so hard to communicate with them sometimes.
The best advice I can give you is..
As MY partner says " Men are simple creatures,stop beating around the bush,and just tell me what you have to say woman!!!!!!"
...............Just tell him how you feel!:fingerscrossed:

[mummybunny]

LOL thank you all for ur advice, i think im going to get my tail out from between my legs and say something to him...
Only i am a little hesitent as he has been talking weddngs and things like that alot lately, maybe i should just wait till after christmas???

[JuniorMinime]

Mine started talking about weddings all the time before he proposed to me. I would say wait till after christmas cause you never know.

If by mid Jan he still hasn't then I would say something. But that's just me.

Good luck though :fingerscrossed:

[Lollie86]

I'd say wait till after Christmas. :thumbsup:

If he is planning something then it would be a lot nicer if its a surprise! :yes:

If after Christmas, still nothing, then I would speak up and ask straight out!

[JordansMummy]

Just ask him! Guys usually don't think of enagement rings that much cos they don't need one. And I think because of that reason he probably hasn't thought about it. Me and DP always talked about getting engaged. On Sunday trade (we don't get it here in WA) we went down the shops for an entirely different reason and ended up ring shopping. Most jewellers do the interest free thing for 12 months. Thats what we done. No major expense straight up and we paid it off monthly and now its all paid for. We have been engaged since Novemeber 2005 and will be getting married August 2007 so we are gonna do the same thing for our wedding bands. Just an idea!!

[heda86]

i don't think its selfish i think that because society says that your not REALLY engaged unless you have the ring to show your engaged.

You feel left out.

You should like go thro ur catlodges all the time circle the ring u want and leave it somewhere he will see it lol.

drop suttle hints...if u really get the jibbers with him just tell him

my partner today actully did the most unoffical way of bringing the subject up lol he said so heather if i brought u an engagment ring for christmas do i still need to get you someting else? I was like umm scott your not ment to tell me your going to ask me lol

i think because im fussy he thought he'd spend the money on a ring i like and fits rather than wasting money, and they not very cheap!! So i found out tonight my man is gunna purpose for christmas, i kinda wish i didn't know coz know im even more excited ans just want him to do it already because being engaged to be engaged is stupid hahaha

[megaminz]

lol I am not promoting this method for everyone cause it may not work for someone else but I was sick of waiting for DH so I told him that if he hadn't proposed to me by the end of that weekend I was just going to buy a ring myself and tell everyone he did anyway!!
He proposed the next day

[mummybunny]

i don't think its selfish i think that because society says that your not REALLY engaged unless you have the ring to show your engaged.

You feel left out.

You should like go thro ur catlodges all the time circle the ring u want and leave it somewhere he will see it lol.

drop suttle hints...if u really get the jibbers with him just tell him

my partner today actully did the most unoffical way of bringing the subject up lol he said so heather if i brought u an engagment ring for christmas do i still need to get you someting else? I was like umm scott your not ment to tell me your going to ask me lol

i think because im fussy he thought he'd spend the money on a ring i like and fits rather than wasting money, and they not very cheap!! So i found out tonight my man is gunna purpose for christmas, i kinda wish i didn't know coz know im even more excited ans just want him to do it already because being engaged to be engaged is stupid hahaha


lol I am not promoting this method for everyone cause it may not work for someone else but I was sick of waiting for DH so I told him that if he hadn't proposed to me by the end of that weekend I was just going to buy a ring myself and tell everyone he did anyway!!
He proposed the next day

thanks for the advise girls but this is a VERY OLD thread lol from back in dec 2006! lol

now we are happily married with a little boy.. i dont know what i did to get the ring but one day he just said to me lets go and get you a ring lol and we did and then 6 months later we were walking down the isle...:goodvibes:

[calsmum]

Show him a picture of the ring you would like and just say "Honey, I've finally found the engagement ring I want. Wanna go look tomorrow?"...