How much drinking is normal?

[Shanaynay]

Hi everyone...... :(

My DH has always drunk a bit too much, and for about a year now I've been thinking he drinks way too frequently. Sometime too much in one night, sometimes not, but her seems to drink about 5 nights a week.
I don't think this is normal....he does and honestly doesn't think there is a problem with it :confused:
Is it just me? Is drinking 5 nights a week normal? Sometimes he might have 2 beers, sometimes 7....he doesn't always drink an excessive amount, but too often iykwim.
It's starting to cause alot of problems :(

What I'm after is jsut people's opinions on whether this is too much drinking, or am I over-reacting?
I'll put a poll on to see what most people think is acceptable. To me, an acceptable number of times drinking (even if only one drink in the night) is probably twice, max 3 times a week.........

[hayleylea]

Hi there. If we had beer in the fridge every day of the week Id almost bet that DF would have one a day..but we dont have it here so he doesnt drink it. He only really drinks on the weekend and even then its probably only up to 7 drinks over a long period of time (unless we decide to have a few drinks together). My BIL drinks every night and it drives my sister mad!!!

I think 2times maybe3 times a week is OK....aslong as its not EXCESSIVE iykwim.

If its starting to cause alot of problems then maybe you need to sit down with him and talk it out. I hope everything works out!

[Bron]

I think that how much he has each evening is a crucial question. I see nothing wrong with someone having one or two standard drinks on 5 nights a week - it's well within the healthy guidelines, includes those crucial alcohol free days and isn't binge drinking. But if he is regularly having 5 or 6 standard drinks a night on 5 nights a week, then that isn't within the healthy guidelines.

My DH probably drinks 5 nights a week, but it is maximum of two drinks. Likewise, in my pre pregnancy life I would have a glass or two of wine most nights of the week. Never too tipsy to drive (except on special occasions) seems to be my rule of thumb.

[aardvark]

We might have 1/2 to 1 glass of red wine with dinner several nights per week.

We're more likely to have it if I have opened a bottle to cook with, which I would do probably at least once per week.

DH's family have a bad history of cholesterol and heart disease, and he was advised to drink red wine several times per week for its medicinal properties, and it is no great hardship to comply.

We've been married nearly 19 years, and I can count the number of times he has been tipsy on one hand, so there is no question of him drinking to excess.

I think it depends on the WHY, WHERE, WITH WHO, and consequences, if any.

I grew up in a house with an alcoholic parent, so I know where you are coming from.

[missmum05]

I don't think its a problem when its only a couple of beers a few nights a week. like not enough to get him drunk. I think if he is actually drunk a few nights a week than I see that as a problem.

[AimeeB]

:wave: Hi My dh makes his own homebrew and he would proba have at least one beer each night.He does go without some nights but just likes to sit after the kids are in bed and we are watching tv and have a beer or two.He doesn't ever get drunk(except maybe on a weekend-but rarely)and I wouldn't say he has a problem.I think it's more of a prob if they think they NEED to have one and drink excessivly.My gran and pop have little vegemite glass(remember those!!) of wine with dinner each night and they certainly don't have a prob.It's more so in summer and I must admit,had I not been pg or bf for the last 5 years of my life i'd prob have a drink to .

[Lil X-men]

I didnt want to vote coz I think 1/2 to one glass of red wine a night is very good for you.
But beer is so blooming fattening that drinking it every night of the week has gotta be bad for you physically. He might not be an alcoholic but I think he could be a bit unhealthy if he is drinking more than two a day. JMO
If my DH drank that much everyday he'd have one heck of a pot belly on him by now!
But we all have different lifestyles so what one household would see as acceptable another would see as unhealthy !
My mum and her husband ( my stepdad) drink a few every night of the week and sometimes get tiddly, I dont really like this but they are happy so I am not going to interfere. Although mum is always on a diet, so it seems so hypocrytical when she drinks so much lol!!

[DQ]

My DH will have a few beers pretty much most nights of the week. He is never "drunk" at home, only on special occassions or if we go out for a few. Even then he is just "jolly" not agro IYKWIM??

My DH runs his own landscaping business so he is constantly throwing around tonnes and tonnes of dirt, turf, plants, pavers etc etc. He's fit enough to do all the manual tasks so I guess his drinking doesn't affect him in that way.

I don't see a problem with it, he works hard enough, I think he's earned it! JMO. :)

[bronny-jane]

my dh drinks a 4 + longies a night...he's sober though, spreads them out........i dont have a problem with it..although i dont drink around my kids:D

[Miss_Vicki]

If your on here posting about it , an its causing problems then mabies its not the Norm for you .
I think some talkin to Dp about how u feel about it is needed (if not done already)
alot of males need to Unwinde after work , I know i used to when i worked,

Been a alcoholick Doesnt have to drink every day nor drink a heap , its the need to drink an when its there not been able to have self control over it .

Some times ppl dont bleave there is a problem till they admit to them selfs.

hope for the best :)

[Lil X-men]

My DH will have a few beers pretty much most nights of the week. He is never "drunk" at home, only on special occassions or if we go out for a few. Even then he is just "jolly" not agro IYKWIM??

My DH runs his own landscaping business so he is constantly throwing around tonnes and tonnes of dirt, turf, plants, pavers etc etc. He's fit enough to do all the manual tasks so I guess his drinking doesn't affect him in that way.

I don't see a problem with it, he works hard enough, I think he's earned it! JMO. :)

Your right if you are doing plenty of exercise then you would burn it off ok, if not though it would be s*#tloads of calories unburned! I am just a health conscious freak I guess.

But like Jazzmums said it's not about the amount it's about whether there is a need to drink. How would he cope if all alcohol was taken out of the house for a week?
If he goes off the rails loony, then there could be a problem, but even then it would be up to him to want to admit it and do something about it, it's hard because you can't make someone believe they have a problem they have to figure it out for themselves.

I hope your hubby doesn't and just enjoys a coldy but could say no if he wanted!

[Shanaynay]

But like Jazzmums said it's not about the amount it's about whether there is a need to drink. How would he cope if all alcohol was taken out of the house for a week?
If he goes off the rails loony, then there could be a problem, but even then it would be up to him to want to admit it and do something about it, it's hard because you can't make someone believe they have a problem they have to figure it out for themselves.

I hope your hubby doesn't and just enjoys a coldy but could say no if he wanted!

Well that's the problem, if there is none in the house, he goes out and buys it. We are in really bad $$$ toubles at the moment, and can't afford this..... if there is some in the fridge, and I ask him not to drink, there is no way he would listen to me. It causes arguments, it's like the beer is more important than me :crying:

...and he DEFINATELY does NOT burn all those calories off :eek:

[Lil X-men]

Hmm yes well that sounds like a bit of a prob to me , especially if it is causing money probs too and he doesn't seem bothered by this, denial. Will he see a counsellor with you? Sometimes the influence of an outsider can wake some one up to the idea that hmmm maybe they formed a bad habit!
I only say this because ( I know I am only 24 but have lived alot in those 24yrs) but I used to have a drinking problem when I was in the military and it wasn't until I was forced into alcohol counselling that I finally actually believed there was a problem and did something about it I am now very ashamed of my problem (and am a healthy person now) and rarely talk about it because of that reason.
Men can be harder though, stubborn buggers wont listen to anyone!
I'm sorry you are so upset about this it's unfair and I hope you can get something done about it soon:hugs: :hugs:

[susiehomemaker]

If money is a problem, and he just keeps going it def sounds like he has a problem. My Nanna is an alchoholic (I dont use the term loosely either- she DT's when she is in hospital and cant get a drink and everything) and ALWAYS has her vice (in her case scotch) in the house and always has. Ahead of food for herself, and back in the day ahead of food for her children too. Ahead of anything at all really (except perhaps cigarettes) If anything is said that she doesnt want to hear in regards to the amount she consumes, how drinking with medication is bad (she takes her meds with a scotch! And smokes while on oxegen- how she hasnt blown herself up...) she arks right up (swearing and everything- she is just lovely) never listens to anyone- no one can stop her. And this is a frail 80 yo who is about 5ft 1- not a man in his prime. I dont know what to suggest, just to say there are support groups out there for people living with alchoholic's. If talking with him isnt getting you anywhere then perhaps speaking to someone at one of these groups might help with ideas on how you can tackle this problem. Good luck, and if you need a symathetic ear feel free to PM me. There are plenty of other symptoms to look for too. Your doctor could probably fill you in- Im not sure of the details as it all came up about 8 years ago with Nanna (when Mum finally twigged) and Im hazzy on the details.

[bronny-jane]

Well that's the problem, if there is none in the house, he goes out and buys it. We are in really bad $$$ toubles at the moment, and can't afford this..... if there is some in the fridge, and I ask him not to drink, there is no way he would listen to me. It causes arguments, it's like the beer is more important than me :crying:

...and he DEFINATELY does NOT burn all those calories off :eek:

yeah its annoying when they buy a few drinks everday, it adds up, maybe you could limit him to a carton a week? once its gone no more beer till next week

[~EmsMum~]

Once a week, maybe twice a week is ok.

[Shanaynay]

Thanks for the responses -
- Bronny Jane, we've tried that before.....he just doesn't care, if the carton is gone he just goes and buys more.

Thanks for the support and :hugs:
I'm just at a loss what to do. It just that he doesn't think he has a problem, so he won't go to counselling, and he doesn't WANT to cut out the drinking, so basically he just sees me as a nag :( Apparently I am the problem, not the drinking :(

[bronny-jane]

Thanks for the responses -
- Bronny Jane, we've tried that before.....he just doesn't care, if the carton is gone he just goes and buys more.



sounds like my dh:rolleyes:

[daisyxs]

when my DP was diagnosed with alcohol induced hepatitis the Dr said that you should have a MINIMUM 3 alcohol free days per week.

considering he got hepatitis obviously he didnt listen!!

[rhona]

I don't think having a beer everyday is bad for you. I have always had 1 or 2 beer everyday but I know when to stop. I think it is good for you.:thumbsup:

Rhona 30
Glenn 31
Bailey James 3

[Hokey Pokey]

I'd say twice a week, weekends???

[IheartOman]

I voted but I based my answer thinking the question was asking how often is it ok to drink as in get drunk. I guess one night a week would be "healthy" for your sake and for your childrens.

Again though this can depend on the person though. Addiction is ugly in any form, whether that be drinking, drugs, eating or anything really!

[tru]

I voted "everyday" and I mean in moderation.

I don't drink everyday but I've grown up with responsible drinking (my parents usually always have one or two beers or wines a night before/during dinner) and think it's fine.

Most french and italian people drink wine at every meal.

When it becomes a 6 pack of beer or more every night then I think it's too much.

If someone needs to drink to relax or have fun I think there may be a problem.