Pretty bad year

[Veruca]

I'm sitting here typing this, feeling absolutely hollow inside. Today was supposed to be one of the happiest of my life. After two months going through all the rigmarole of IVF, today was meant to be implantation day. Unfortunately none of my embryos were any good, without going into too much detail, they either had genetic defects or simply stopped growing. We've been told age is a factor and I just don't know what our next step will be. I feel like I have nothing to look forward to anymore, our options are running out. Sorry for being such a downer. Thanks for listening.:gloomy:

[SuperWoman]

Marthe, oh hun Im sorry:hugs: . I don't know what to say. Don't be sorry for expressing your feelings thats what we are here for. Has your Doc said anything about what happens next? Can you do another cycle?

I understand that feeling of being hollow inside and thinking that there is nothing to look forward to. If you ever want to chat dont hesitate to PM me hun.

Take care xoxoxo:hugs:

[Shajbm]

Snork Maiden, Oh hun, I'm sorry you're feeling really low. It's a hard time having to go through the whole process and then not having any embies to transfer is even worse. Contact your FS and see what they have to say maybe there is something that can be done next time. Hang in there.

[mercimum]

hi ther snork maiden.

Sorry to hear about your cycle. I don't know if your curcumstances are the same but I to did not make it to transfer. I had 8 really good eggs removed then 45 mins before transfer they all degenerated:thumbsdown: . The answer was poor egg quality. I have conceived my beautifull girl merci naturally. i was just guttered. We have had a really bad year so at the moment I am doing some accupuncture/herbs to try & build up the eggs. I was under the impresion that poor egg quality came with age, apparently not so. I have only just turned 35.

I do feel the emotional pull whenever I think about it. Was it just a one of or will this be it for us.

I am thinking of you at this time if you need to chat please pm me.

mercimum

[RoarsomeMum]

Oh Snork, I cant even begin to imagine how heartbreaking and frustrating.... I wish I could give more, but since I cant here are :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: .

[vangaalen04]

Oh Marthe, I know how you are feeling. I have pm'd you.

Warm hugs,
Alyson.

[firsttimeivf]

I'm so sorry you are going through all of this. It can be such an up and down process can't it. There are so many hurdles to stumble at along the journey....... I can understand how upset you must be. Sending lots of hugs and hope that things improve for you.:hugs:
Love Emma xx

[novice surf chick]

Hey there, know how you feel, had my first IVF cycle about a month ago and although 5 fertilized, and they put one back, none of them survived. It was like you have climbed a mountain only to see another mountain right ahead and you have to start all over again. Except this time you have already expended all that energy and emotion on the first climb and you simply can't face it again. I got sick, cut myself off from friends and was very run down physically and emotionally. This is all after a bugger of a year with 4 mths of injury from Jan, and way too many medical experiences!!

Then I thought- well I had stopped myself doing things because I was TTC and worrying that I may harm any growing embies. So decided to take up surfing, which was one of the things I had not done due to TTC. My husband and I talked of travel and just doing other things and forgetting the IVF and the having a baby thing. I think this was all because we were so over it, even though we had only done one IVF cycle.

It has taken me 5 weeks since the AF to think about the slight possibility of trying again. I haven't visited this site since then until today. I blocked out any thoughts of TTC all that time.

I am still not sure if I can face trying again. So my advice is be sad for a bit, it is awful. But know that after a portion of time, perhaps weeks or months, you'll feel better. I know it is hard but try to do something for yourself that will make you feel better. In my case that is surfing and I have been twice this week. Still can't stand up though!! :wave:

Love Novice Surfer

[chindonly]

Marthe - Just wanted to pop in and say how sorry I am! I cant imagine how you must've felt receiving the news:-(
Sounds like there are ladies here who could be of some help to you since they have exp'd what you are going through right now.
Wishing you the best!

[oliveinthesun]

I completely understand your pain. After 2 years of reading up on pregnancy, trying on natural way of getting pregnant, we found out the only way for us to have a biological child is to have IVF/ICSI. We started the process in June. The 1st cycle ended up in OHSS so I was very ill and the cycle was cancelled 2 days before the egg pick up. Waited 2 months then another cycle... we got 'negative' results 2 weekends ago. I felt like you 10 days ago. We are now opting for the natural frozen cycle this month.

We are also planning on trips in case it doesn't happen. Through all these, I am now taking some time off from work which I always enjoyed... So much sucrifice so it's normal to feel dissapointed and down when you are not pregnant at the end of all the shots, early morning scans/blood tests/food & drink limitations/staying away from high impact exercise...

Lots of love,
Please don't give up hope:hugs: