Why is it???

[Billy]

That no matter my good intentions to be an AP parent, my daughter has other ideas???

As some of you might remember she decided not to co-sleep with me at 4 months (although I still get to sometimes early morning :D ) which I was very sad about, as she slept so well by herself in her cot :o (Which is right next to my bed)

I decided we were compromising as i would sit right there with her and soothe her to sleep and stroke her face until she dropped off...

Until this morning when I had to use the loo quickly when I had put her in her cot to nap, so ran off and when I came back she was asleep!! By herself- aka without me!!

Why is my DD so independant??

I know lots of mums would love their kids to do this- but I just want her to want me a teensy bit more... :(

Ok rant over... Sorry if this makes me sound terrible... :o

[sueliz]

It doesn't make you sound terrible at all!!

Your DD obviously self settels and is independent because she feels so sfae and secure in the environment YOU provide. She obviously knows you are there and will be around whenever she needs you.

I understand what you mean though - when my DS rolled over and put his back to me to put himself to sleep for the first time I just stood there feeling very un-needed!!!

[TreeFrog]

Your DD obviously self settels and is independent because she feels so sfae and secure in the environment YOU provide. She obviously knows you are there and will be around whenever she needs you.

That's what I thought too:yes: She must get such comforting vibes off you too and she knows that you are close, loving and nearby. My DD (31 mths) is an independent one too, but is still 'attached' you could say and always loves a good cuddle, comes into our bed in the early morning (or starts in our bed at night) and is very affectionate and gentle. Yet, she does let us know when she wants her own space and she entertains herself quite well. I think that just let her do her own thing and things will sort themselves out. Go with the flow is my favourite saying with parenting.

Sounds like you are so loving and gentle that I think is just responding to that. You are still attached.

[the_queen]

Your DD obviously self settels and is independent because she feels so sfae and secure in the environment YOU provide. She obviously knows you are there and will be around whenever she needs you.

I'm going to quote this again because it is so true.

Bill - your gorgeous Rhianna feels so attached to you that she's confident enough to be away from you. Shed made a great analogy - if you know there's a safety net, you're more likely to try the trapeze. Curtis sometimes will not settle UNLESS I put him in the side-car cot by himself. It's like he's saying "I do love ya ma, but give me some SPACE! " :laughing:

And, just for semantic's sake ;) co-sleeping is defined as having baby sleep in the same room as you. So her cot is next to your bed? Heh, you're still co-sleeping :yes:

:kiss:

[Billy]

And, just for semantic's sake co-sleeping is defined as having baby sleep in the same room as you. So her cot is next to your bed? Heh, you're still co-sleeping


:smiliedance: Yay! Thank you for that queen...

:hugs: Thank you so much for your replies girls, especially for your much quoted line Sueliz, it makes me feel heaps better :yes:

Yes my darling girl is very independant already- but she does love coming to mummy for cuddles and all those special moments.... So I guess I can let her have her space (lol just like Curtis!) while she wants it...

It just makes me feel a teensy bit 'un-needed' as you said Sueliz... but I'll get used to it... Looks as though I'd better! LOL Oh well...

Thanks again Sueliz, Tree Frog and Queenie...Much appreciated :hugs:

[nut]

Everyone else said it so well already, but just to reconfirm- attachment parenting is about being child-lead and meeting the needs of that child. It sounds as if you are doing the perfect job there:) . The Queen took the words out of my mouth by pointing out that rooming in is still co-sleeping. We do half in our bed co-sleeping and half in his cot in our room co-sleeping, but he always knows we are right there, he can always get to a cuddle quickly, and he is a happy, bonded boy.:hugs:

[Shanaynay]

Everyone else said it so well already, but just to reconfirm- attachment parenting is about being child-lead and meeting the needs of that child. It sounds as if you are doing the perfect job there:)

:yes: - couldn't have said it better myself.

I think what this shows is you are doing a fantastic job! My first DD was a real little independent thing too - still is!

The other girls have said it all :thumbsup: , but just wanted to add that don't forget that being AP is also all about your mindset and your beliefs about how to parent your child - you don't need a dependent bub to be that!!
:hugs:

[kymmy]

Natural Pare nting is about following your child's cues - you are doing well! :thumbsup: