Single Working Parents - How Do You Do It

[Kamaikia]

I started a new job not too long ago and struggling to keep up. I work most mornings then come straight home to my son and all I want to do is sit down and rest for awhile. I am doing a pretty physical job.
Since I have started my son has been sick with everything you could think of - so I'm tired and stressed and not handling it all too well. I would love to never work but financially its not an option. My son's father is not in the picture so I am doing everything on my own.
I feel like I am the only one who can't cope with it all. HELP

[WeThree]

hi Kamaikai, sorry i didnt reply sooner, but ive only just seen this post.


I worked when i was a single mum, and i agree, it was Hard! i didnt mind it though as it gave me some time with other grownups! the difficult thing about being a single parent and working is that there is no one else at home to help with the other things that still need to be done, housework, help with homework, cooking etc. i guess the best piece of advice i have is dont be too hard on yourself, my house is alot cleaner than it used to be, because i dont have to work out of the home, and i have someone else ot help me with the kids! but when i was one my own their is no way my house was ever in tip top shape, and i was constantly apologising to people for it and beating myself up over it~ no way would i do that now! do what you can, be as organised as possible, and try and stay on top of the essential things(otherwise it can quikly sem overwhelming) make sure you spend time with your little boy (sorry i think u have a boy?? cant remember :) ) and try to relax. dont be afraid to ask your parents, or anyone else you have close to you to help with dropping off/picking up your child from school/childcare or if they would mind taking him to the movies or something sometimes so that ou can have some time on your own to catch up on the housework etc. feel free to pm me if you want to chat more about it :)

[xkwzit]

And I'm not going to be too helpful either, as I do have a partner. But I just want to say that I have a tremendous amount of respect for single parents in general and esp working single parents in particular. The closest I get is on the odd occaision when DH goes away and that's only for a few days at a time. Even at the end of that, I'm really OVER the temp single parent thing.

So please don't beat yourself up. I think that some work would prob be good for you, but maybe something that's not as physically tiring, or a little while from now. And I think that Coops' idea of enlisting all the help you can is great too. Even if you hate to ask for help, I'm sure that you've got ppl around you who would love to help you out.

Cheers

[Supermum]

Hi Kamaikia

I’m not a single mum. I am fortunate to have a very supportive husband.

I have always, and will continue to extol the virtues of single parents. I take my hat off to you all. No matter how hard I have done it over the past 2½ years, I have always had in the back of my mind that there are parents out there doing it tougher, for whatever reason.

Do what you can with what you have. If you have support available, in whatever form, use it. If someone is available to help you out … let them. If you don’t have any support then I am truly sorry.

What you are doing IS hard. Like Erin said, don’t be too hard on yourself, don’t try and get everything done and try to do something for you.

You’re doing the hardest job in the world (I think) … on your own. You should be immensely proud of yourself.

Hoping help comes along for you soon.

[Lucybelle]

Oh man those days were hard, but I was lucky and had a lot of family support. I was working two jobs for awhile.

I learnt to reprioritise things. House work just had to wait. I did the bare minimum during the week, and fly around in a Saturday morning. I always got more done if I timed myself and turned the stero up!

There were many times dd and I sat amongst piles of washing, eating noodles in front of the telly and just generally hanging out. I needed to be with her, so the dishes waited. When I look back, those times were hard, but it was just me and dd against the world, and whilst we didn't have lots of money, we did have fun just being silly girls, just her and I.

Please take the time - just an hour or so a week, just to rest, recharge and pamper yourself, you have lots on your plate, but if you don't eat well and have some fun, you will fall in a heap.

Take care

[samecutie222]

ok so i know this post is pretty old
but i am a single mum working full time and i just have a few little tips/advice

-i have a checklist, for morning jobs, and evening jobs. so when im feeling stressed i just look at what i have to do.
my priorities are cooking dinner, doing the dishes (its easier to keep on top of them but sometimes a simple dinner doesnt get to many dishes and u can skip, hehe) and doing the washing. but its not a priority to fold or iron the washing, as long as its clean u can always go from there!
housework is not important to me like it used to be, my house is neat and clean but not utterly perfect like it was when i was a stay at home mum.

mornings are more stressful than evenings, of course.
i tend to have my clothes picked the night before and have my shower and make up, then do the brekky and change little one.... my work clothes go on at the LAST minute (no milk splatters thanks!) lol

i am lucky that i dont have to work weekends, and my job is 9 to 5. so we dont leave home till 830am.
work is a break for me in some aspects? haha, sounds odd! i work generally unsupervised in a busy office so i like controlling my own workload (to a degree)

it is HARD but you know what i have a massive sense of pride that i am trying to improve the situation/stability for myself and my son

im pretty lucky that i can see my son enjoys day care and his development quickened in day care also.

the biggest tip i have (if u can do it) is move next to your work... i live about 500 metres from work. the trek is just to his day care (10-15 mins)
so i come home on my lunch break and watch some oprah or even hang some washing...
its refreshing to have that half an hr all by myself in the day.

its draining but if ur organised (within reason, you have to know what to leave) then you will be fine

ohhh.........and another tip (im on a roll, sorry) do your grocery shoppin at 9am on sat! Ok i know it sux rushin out but u can have all that little stuff done by 10am and enjoy your whole weekend...and lets face it, ur prolly up at that time if u have a child anyways!

and naughty, but sometimes i put my little man in my bed now...i like to be able to have that closeness...even if it is in our sleep hehe!