Need To Vent!!!!

[boogernsqueak]

GRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!

i'm sorry to subject you all to this, but i've reached my snapping point and if i don't let it out, i'm gonna snap.
i have a horrid family. there is no respect or compassion and i'm fed up!!!

during my pregnancy, i had a pretty rough time. i wasn't really getting along with any family members because of the past problems.
anyway, it got to a point where my mother and i had a screaming match, both saying nasty things and we weren't talking. we have a very strained relationship at the best of times so this just all blew up.

anyhow, my older brother and his girlfirend, who is now pregnant, decided that for whatever reason, they would tell everyone i was using drugs and getting drunk all the time while i was pregnant.
i had no idea about any of this until 3 days after i had my daughter.

it turned into chinese whispers where it was said that my daughter was having seizures because she was having withdrawels from my drug use. WTF?!?!?!

i instantly felt like the worlds worst mother, even though i never touched anything while pregnant.

my pregnancy was rough on me because i ended my relationship with the dad, and was moving around alot, gnerally depressed. i talked to a mutual friend of my brothers and mine, and told her i was even considering adoption as i wasn't sure i could give my daughter the life she deserved.
i now found out that my brother went around bragging to everyone, including my mother that i was going to do it because i was incompetent!!!
of all the people i thought could be heartless pricks (sorry) i never expected it to be my brother.

aaarrrggghhh!!!! i spent all night last night crying my eyes out wondering if i had done the right thing by keeping her, and now i feel even guiltier for that!!!:banghead:

this isn't the only stuff up for me, its just the worst by far. i can't even think about him and his girlfriend without wanting to hurt them really bad.
they are that pathetic they have to sit around and make up stories about me.
i don't wantto see them ever again. i know thats harsh but this is just too much.:mad:

am i over reacting?

[Lilys*mummy]

I dont think you are over-reacting at all!I would be so mad to!:mad:
I hope you are feeling better soon. :)
Your brother had no right to say those hurtful things.

[boogernsqueak]

thanks love. :o

it just gets my goat that they think they have a right to be saying these things.
when i found out i was apparently taking drugs, i was still in hospital and the baby blues were just kicking in.
so to be asked by your dad, 'why didn't you tell the doctors you were taking drugs?' just after you've had your baby really upset me. (so much so that i had to leave the maternity ward as i was on the phone and i went feral at him for even asking such a question)
sophia had the jitters for a couple of days when she came out. it turned into "seizures", according to my brothers girlfriend.

i think its more a case of them looking down on me, disapproving of everything i do, and they are better than me, because they aren't single parents, and they aren't suffering from depression.
if you can't rely on your family, who can you rely on?

[Elfin]

I can understand how hurt and disappointed you are in your family especially at time when you needed their support the most.

Look the best advice I can give is forget about them and stay away from all their **** Just be the best mummy you can be for your daughter and make them eat humble pie. Join a mothers group and a playgroup and make some new friends.

[Roopee]

aw:hugs: to you!

I dont think your over reacting at all!!! You are well within your rights to forget these people exist.

Please dont doubt your mothering abilities- you will be a great mum and your daughter needs you. Your her mother and you love her to pieces, i can tell from your post. Dont let these !d!ots dictate the way you feel. Rise above it and become the best mummy you can be.
I hope you are able to move past this and just know we are all here for you:kiss:

[SairBear]

:hugs: omg u arent over reacting at all hun.

You dont need to be around negative ppl when u are down. And (sorry to say) what an $%6hole of a bro u have!!!

U need support in a time like this, not what u are getting from your family. Shame on them!:shame:

As the other girls have said forget what everyone else is doin on concertate on ur lil girl and being the best mummy . And find some positive ppl to help you and be there for u and not bring u down.:)

I cant say i fully understand what u are goin thru as no one can, but i can be a friendly ear.
If u ever need to vent or just have a chat. Feel free to PM me.

[mum2bubba]

No you're not over reacting. What kind of brother says those things? Even if they ARE true, as your brother he should be helping you get support or whatever and not saying such horrible things. :shame: :eek:

My sil called child protection on me and told them heaps of BS and it makes you feel like a bad mum even though you are dong all you can to be a good mum so I sort of know how you feel.

I think your brother needs to grow up and before he does (IF he does) I think its probably best to stay away, or at least have him explain himself. Tell you what, if anyone in my family said that about me I wouldn't want them in mine or my daughter's life (we don't speak to sil as it is, hopefully stays that way)

Best of luck and give me your brothers phone number, I'll give him what for. :shame: :mad:

[boogernsqueak]

thanks honies.

yes he's a bit of a ****. am i allowed to say that on here?

i have confronted him about it. he didn't even come to see his niece at the hospital after she was born, and still hasn't seen her. his exact words were, 'i haven't got time for that kind of thing'. well hows he gonna be when his baby arrives? too busy?
he flat out denied ever saying anything nasty but i saw the proof last nite in a few text messages he had sent.

it is hard because i am a new mum and i don't know what i'm doing half the time, but this kind of **** on top of it all just makes me feel bad.
i know i shouldn't. but parenting, or what i have learnt in the last 3 weeks, is a very touchy subject and a bit of sensitivity especially coming from your family wouldn't go astray........but you know what they say, you can't choose your family. pity.

sairbear, look out for those pm's cause i'll be takingyou up on your offer alot!!!
and mum2bubba i would love to give you his phone number........:devil6:

[mumoftwoboys2005]

Hi. Firstly :hugs: :hugs: to you and your little girl. I agree with what the other ladies have said. Keep your distance from your family because obviously they have nothing better to do than upset you and once they see that they have achieved that, they'll keep it up. I am not sure where you are living but you are welcome to pm me if you like. Do you have any close friends that you can get support from? By the way, as long as your baby is fed and clothed, that's all she'll want from you for the first few months as well as all the love you can give her.

You are doing a great job and don't let anyone tell you any different unless they are interested in speaking to me. :yes: :yes:

[Gumby]

You know I luv ya chicken, we are going to be family some day. James says to give Sophia a kiss from him ;):kiss:

[Crazyfamily]

Hey there,
Obviously you know me lol. You know I think you are doing a great job and you are going to be a great mummy. Maybe you could start to lean on the people who really are not judging you and forget about the ones who are for now. I know I am really busy with my own lot but I am trying to be there for you when you need it even tho I have to cancel sometimes. I adore your little girl and I hope you give me the chance to be your aunty again. Well obviously I always was but you never really had the chance to know me.
I am no miracle worker nor a mind reader so my offer of help always stands and like i said you will need to ask as I won't interfere.
As for Gand C, I would also help them and get to know them if given a chance but it is wrong for anyone to go shooting off about anything so serious with out proof.
I do hope everything is going good for you at your mums. Hopefully little Sophia can help do some mending there also.
Good luck love, we certainly don't have the easiest family but if you always do what you believe to be the best for bub you can't go wrong.
love to you and bubxx

[boogernsqueak]

:kiss: i know and you have been a huge help.
its just that i really used to look up to G and now he treats me like the scumof the earth, because i didn't do things his way and turn out like him.
he used to be a great guy, really caring and understanding, but i don't know what went wrong.
i think when their baby comes they are going to get a huge reality check. i'm just hoping that they still let us be a part of the babies life. its sophias cousin afterall and it would be a shame to keep the kids seperated. but i think he will be a jackass about that too. oh well. my rant is over now. thanks for listening and offering advice. :o