Depressing

[becstar]

Whenever I pop my head in here for a read I always end up getting quite depressed as there always seems to be a raging debate going on in several threads about c-section V VBAC....this is something that is always going to be an issue and I can understand why many people are passionate about it.....but there are two sides to every story......

I agree that we need knowledge to make decisions about VBAC and there are many cases where women are probably having c-sections when it is not required....... but on the otherhand, although it would be great if all of us who have had previous tramatic labour and emergency c-sections could go on to be empowered with a great VBAC, this is not always going to happen......(NO MATTER HOW MUCH WE ALL WISH IT WAS!!).

Please remember that there are two sides to every story and its a very emotional issue for both sides.....each women should have the right to make their own decisions and be armed with knowledge from both sides......and their final decision should be understood and respected....

Depressed again,

Bec

[Billy]

Absolutely I agree :yes: Best of luck in your decisions :hugs: xox

[Gruzzlebub]

Dear Becstar - I am very very sorry for contributing to this. :no: I will no longer be posting on the "other" thread.


each women should have the right to make their own decisions and be armed with knowledge from both sides......and their final decision should be understood and respected....

Yes, we shouldn't ever lose sight of this.

xx

[Africamum]

becstar,

I agree with your comments:yes: .

I am not sure why it is such an emotive issue, it is certainly a very personal one.

[reAllytee]

Coming from a different angle being a mum who had a rather traumatic VB & was told she would require c/s from now on i have to say ive often been scared by many of the c-section threads because they are so against them & have so many statistics showing how harmful it can be etc. Yes dont get me wrong im not stupid i can see there is risk but there are risks with anything we take on in life. Yet no-one shows what harm that can be done with a VB. I had third degree tearing inside & out as well as grazing, still 19mths on i can feel my scars, can have trouble sitting down & sex can often be the worst painful experience ever. I also have a prolapse which wont be rectified until after ive finished having kids ( yeah great ) & have an extremely weak pelvic floor due to it all ( wetting yourself in public is so great ) so really there are bad sides to everything.
I just wish i now wasnt so scared of which route i should take. Yes knowledge is power but sometimes too much knowledge can be scary.

[bambikins]

Don't let them get you down:hugs: I know how you feel............it's amazing to think that they have a VBAC and VB forums on this site (they're like ghost towns), but all the viewing and interest lies in this one:smiliedance:

You would think that all the interest and celebrating of VB's along with all the VB links would go into the other forums, but the party always seems to be in here.iykwim

[Minke]

I'm not pro v/b, vbac, or c/s

I'm pro-healthy baby, whichever way it comes out. There will always be horror stories on both sides, but that comes with birthing babies and always has.

I was reading somewhere the other day that womens life expectancy has gone through the roof - because in the mid-1800's 1 in 42 (or something like that) births resulted in the mother dying (and in most cases I'd assume, bub too).

Instead or arguing about the best type of birth (with the fear campaigns from both sides), I just wish everyone could be thankful that we live in an age where birthing a baby, while it still has its risks, isn't as risky as it used to be. (THANK YOU MODERN TECHNOLOGY! I wouldn't be here without you and neither would my boy)

......... AND YOU HAVE THE CHOICE!!!!

"and their final decision should be... respected...."

As long as the mum is happy with her decision, that's all that matters, and nobody should pressure or scare her out of her decision, whether it be vbac or c/s...

No offense intended to women who have had traumatic births (v/b/vbac or c/s) - my friend lost her baby during labour, and that to me is far worse than anything else... That put everything in perspective for me...

[Buddha Bubbas]

I totally agree with you Becstar :yes:
To the point where i think im going to stay out of these threads from now on. Reason being i am sick of hearing how great some peoples c/sections were and how they recovered so quickly and even about having a high pain threshold. No offence to those but it just makes me feel like i failed and i was weak :o

As you said:
"...... final decision should be understood and respected" :thumbsup:

[zenifa]

Reason being i am sick of hearing how great some peoples c/sections were and how they recovered so quickly and even about having a high pain threshold. No offence to those but it just makes me feel like i failed and i was weak :o


Sorry to hear that you feel this way. I think its important for women interested, to hear all stories about birth, both good and bad about both vaginal and c/s births.Knowledge (research based and anecdotal) is power and it helps us to make decisions or just be more aware of what may happen (as our birth experience is not always in our control). All of us are different and that doesn't mean that you were weak or failed if your experience was different by being more difficult. I just wish these threads could be more about sharing experiences and provide support to each other, than trying to criticise, debate and impose our views on others.

[reAllytee]

Instead or arguing about the best type of birth (with the fear campaigns fromboth sides), I just wish everyone could be thankful that we live in an age where birthing a baby, while it still has its risks, isn't as risky as it used to be. (THANK YOU MODERN TECHNOLOGY! I wouldn't be here without you and neither would my boy) AND YOU HAVE THE CHOICE!!!![/SIZE]



:yelclap:

[Buddha Bubbas]

Sorry to hear that you feel this way. I think its important for women interested, to hear all stories about birth, both good and bad about both vaginal and c/s births.Knowledge (research based and anecdotal) is power and it helps us to make decisions or just be more aware of what may happen (as our birth experience is not always in our control). All of us are different and that doesn't mean that you were weak or failed if your experience was different by being more difficult. I just wish these threads could be more about sharing experiences and provide support to each other, than trying to criticise, debate and impose our views on others.

I totally agree with you. :yes:

[Lila]

bec
couldn´t have said it better :)

at the end of the day we are all mums and worthy, no matter how we birthed!
most of us already feel "bad" about not achieving a vb!!!

HUGS