Gifted?

[3soon2be]

Hi. I'm interested in hearing from parents of gifted children? How are they gifted? How advanced are they? Are they in private school? Were they gifted from the start?

[Jennybaby]

I'm subscribing because I'm interested. I have a three year old that I suspect is gifted...but not sure. Would love to know what I am ment to do for him!

[3soon2be]

Well my son is in year 1 and does year 2 work, reads novels and knows just about anything to know about animals. All he likes doing is watching documentaries and doing homework. I find they need alot of support. He's now in a private school as I found the primary schools didn't want to advance him where the private schools need them to do well so can get funding. I just encourage as much homework as I can at home. You can buy alot of text books now. Just encouragement and don't let people tell you they are too young to excel. The younger the better! He now doesn't muck up at school as he's not bored. I started this topic as interested in how advanced kids are. My nephew did his hsc in maths in year 10 so years 11 and 12 he didn't have to do maths and could start some uni early. He's now engineering on ships and has a team that are building a thing to go to the moon in 3 years. He's also looking at going to London where there's a robot uni where they make like i robot and he wants to be a part of it. He's only 20! So excelling pays off if they stay interested. :)

[Jennybaby]

My son is a lot younger obviously, so I'm probably don't have much that will be relevant for you. The things my son is doing that are starting to alert me are: he reads early reader books, can memorize entire stories word for word (longer children's books say 20 pages), can count forwards and backwards to sixty and can recognize the numbers (haven't exposed him past that yet), can do simple addition in his head with single digit numbers. That's all I can think of right now.
I am getting a bit stressed about him starting school in a year and a half, just because he is already capable of the work and I am worried that he will be in a class where they are learning a is for apple for a week. I just don't know what the right move is...or if he is even really advanced for his age. I might just be easily impressed!

[3soon2be]

In my opinion private school is the go. If it's unable to be done you definately need a school you can explain the situation and they can give him work for his mentality. My son was at 3 schools and got in trouble at all from boredom way too easy. Now this private school they don't let him get bored. He goes to Kindy class with another year 1 boy and teaches him to read and spell and they occupy him in ways like this. You just really need to look into your options. My son couldn't read before school. Once school started within a month he was advanced in everything as it was school he was interested in!

[Honeymoonbub]

Jennybaby, my son is the same. One and half years until school, and he is reading (first readers) and writing. I too am worried that there will be no challenge for him, but at the same time I want to encourage him to learn while he wants to learn! The system has lots of flexibility if kids are behind (as it should), but not for those who are ahead. Our schooling is so age based that it's frustrating. Talking to kindy teachers for him for next year and their aim is for him to recognize which letters are in his name by the end of next year, and other similar things. I wish he could just skip it and go into prep! He is emotionally/socially ready for school too.

[River Song]

my son is in year 2 (8 years old)

Tested Reading age at 7, was 12 y7 mth
Spelling 11year

reader level 40 (98% accuracy)...not tested at a higher one

Maths - Doing year 3/4/5 work

His passion is history...he knows all the kings and queens of England, he knows about all the great empires...he is also a dinosaur fan.

He is a ball of contradiction though...is loud and boy like and at times very immature.

He is recognised as having a symetric development...his fine motor skills delayed and struggles with writing.

He started reading and doing maths at 2/3 years...

All i can say is work with them...find their area of passion and do any extra work around that. Try if you can to find their area of weakness and find ways to develop it without causing them stress. Try and find an area they find a challenge and get them involved in it so they don't lose the ability to persevere at something they find hard.

We have just pulled him out of a private school as he was not getting any extension work...he will be homeschooled for 6 months and then start at a local school that specialises in gifted and talented education.

[OJandMe]

If you have access to a multiage school that is always a good option too, as having children of higher ages in teh class the teacher can give your child work that challenges them, while also providing a social environment that is age appropriate, having kids their own age to play with, work at a higher grade, and not be 'singled out' which can cause issues as they get older...

I think my 3yr old is G & T... and I feel soo soo soo bad that I haven't done more with him... he's crying out for challenge and stimulation, and I just can't find the time! I MUST make time for him! Every day he comes up and says "Hey Mum... can you teach me to read today????"

Oh so hate being so busy :(

[3soon2be]

Just wondering smileygirl how you find out there reading year and levels? I agree. Find what they are interested in and keep them going. My son doesn't have friends outside of school but neither did my nephew as you find they can't communicate socially due to their mental capacity and some say its even them as they feel they can't communicate wit the non gifted as such. Each is different though. Good luck to all our gifted ones :)

[Jennybaby]

I Totally agree re the set up of our schooling system and age. They actually did a study somewhere in Scandinavian where they put more money and time into their gifted kids and found it boosted results across the board.
I am not a fan of the private schools nearby our place. The school your son is at certainly sounds good. It must be a real shock for you that he went from not reading to novels in a year!

Does anybody have info on child development professionals? Can you have your child assessed or something? Similar to what you would if your child was behind. It would be so good to speak to someone and get an idea of a plan...or be told that what he is doing is normal and nothing to stress about! Does that make sense?

[BlissedOut]

Just wondering smileygirl how you find out there reading year and levels? I agree. Find what they are interested in and keep them going. My son doesn't have friends outside of school but neither did my nephew as you find they can't communicate socially due to their mental capacity and some say its even them as they feel they can't communicate wit the non gifted as such. Each is different though. Good luck to all our gifted ones :)

If communication is a weakness, then maybe you need to look into strengthening that? Nurturing passions is important, but so is strengthening weaknesses.

Another question, I may be way off the mark, but have you considered he may have autism? The communication issues, skill building with reading and your nephews engineering skills fit the loose profile of Aspergers.

He sounds like a fascinating boy, I'm glad he's being intellectually stimulated at school. I was labelled as gifted while in school and I had similar social issues and was very naughty as a result of boredom and frustration, I wish I had the opportunities you've secured for your son.

[River Song]

The school will do testing over the years (both public and private) and be able to tell you reading ages. You can also get them assessed by educational pyschologists and they can prepare reports to help you know the best way to support them.

They run similar tests that they do for autism and learning difficulties and often they have many similar characterisics. Often, gifted children are on the Autism spectrum.

Helping a gifted child survive through the lower years of primary is hard and often heart breaking. They don't always do well socially and often misbehave due to boredom. It is a balance between just letting the school do their thing and being involved enough to monitor things. Also remember, that every parent thinks their kid is super special and there will often be a lot of resistance from schools at labelling them and extending them. IF they seem happy and content, just let them go. Do extra stuff at home.

Working on social skills is essential...as i said early, identify their areas of weakness and develop them. For my son, physically he struggles so we got him involved in Karate from a young age...helped loads physically, taught him perseverance at a task he did not find easy, a new social environment too. I am working hard to ensure he does not just "disappear into himself".

We are presently on the wait list for the Krongold Centre in Melbourne, for a more thorough assessment. He does have many asperger type traits as well as clear academic gifts. I often wish he was a more average child...his life would be so much easier and I think he would be happier and have more friends...and I would be less worried about him and get less agro from other parents and from school.

I avoid talking about him academically for fear of being labelled by other parents as bragging. I have had nasty comments from parents who did in class reading with him from Prep onwards (he was level 18 at beginning of prep) to the point where I was almost in tears. I always divert the conversation to someone else's kids talents if i am asked. I am hoping the new school he is going to next year will be better...they even have a support group for parents of gifted kids and recognise how hard it is.

[mim1]

I think my 3yr old is G & T... and I feel soo soo soo bad that I haven't done more with him... he's crying out for challenge and stimulation, and I just can't find the time! I MUST make time for him! Every day he comes up and says "Hey Mum... can you teach me to read today????"

Oh so hate being so busy :(

:hugs: It's hard. What about getting him Reading Eggs and letting him play on that? My ds started trying to read signs along the road when he was 3 ... he was recognising the letters and trying to guess what the words sounded like. I wasn't at all ready for that and I was working long hours and so was my dh. But, I found Reading Eggs and we spent a bit of time a few times a week doing it together. He didn't have the fine motor skills to manage the mouse, so I did the computer mouse/keyboard stuff and he told me what to do. Within a few months he took over.

[mim1]

If communication is a weakness, then maybe you need to look into strengthening that? Nurturing passions is important, but so is strengthening weaknesses.

Another question, I may be way off the mark, but have you considered he may have autism? The communication issues, skill building with reading and your nephews engineering skills fit the loose profile of Aspergers.

Not all gifted kids with communication issues have Aspergers or Austim Spectrum Disorder. Some do, but far from all of them. I struggled at school socially as I had trouble connecting on an intellectual level with many fellow students. I just didn't click. I wasn't the only gifted student in my year, but a lot of the time I felt like I was as the school didn't have a dedicated gifted program. My dh's school did have a dedicated gfited student program and from what he says he had a great time doing some really cool stuff. I got into an accelerated uni degree after finishing school and it was like a light went on - suddenly I didn't feel so different, there really were other people like me :D.

I've had issues with trying to communicate to my ds's teachers/potential schools that he is gifted. He's quiet socially so that really doesn't help promote his skills. He went into Kinder (in an Early Learning Centre of a Private School cause we felt he needed extra stimulation) young (just 4) and for that year he struggled socially. 'I can't do it' or 'I don't know' were words frequently out of his mouth - eg. 'where is your right hand?' was 'I don't know' ... but he's known since he was 2! It was hard for the teachers to understand he could read & do complex maths. This year, in his 2nd year of kinder he's no longer saying 'I don't know'/etc and he's fitting in socially with the other kids and letting his skills slowly be seen.

He's always going to be needing extra challenges academically, but socially he needed to do a little more growing up before starting school. He will go to a private school from Prep as we think that this little quiet achiever would be totally lost in the public system. We looked at a number of private schools and ended up with only 1 option that we were happy with. One school principal said that children shouldn't read before starting school (trying to stop my ds from reading is like trying to stop a run away train) and another school left gifted programs up to the individual classroom teacher, which in our minds was a bit too hit & miss. The school we chose has a teacher (part time) who makes plans for the gifted kids and will organise acceleration in subjects (but not year levels as a whole) as needed. We're happy with that.

We're also waiting on an appointment at the Krongold Centre to get him assessed formally as I think it will help his Prep teacher understand him. He still has social issues that will persist, such as an exaggerated sense of right & wrong, but with help that can be harnessed for good :).

[3soon2be]

Yeah it was a shock him going to novels quick but he's always been the type that if he's interested in something he takes it in very quickly.
Now that you mention it my sister said my nephew has aspergers but she said although through school he was a loner as we called it he's now 20 and in the Last 2 years he's always out wit friends as he has friends he can talk to now if you know what I mean. So I'm happy him doin his own thing. He'll get there.
As for the parents saying things cos your son was great at reading Thats wrong. I always tell people about Craig and what he can do cos it's great and I'm so proud and no one should make you feel any less. If they had said somethin to me I would of thought how rude and told them its great my son is so advanced. How dare they critisize cos they are jealous! Sorry that got me rather angry. I have taught my son that his talents is great and to never hide it especially cos other kids can be terrible but to hear parents doing it! Craig's school is great and his teaches is very interested in the gifted which does help though. Be proud Thats all I can say. :)

[3soon2be]

I also agree with above. It might not be aspergers but just that he can't communicate well not can't but he can't talk to the other kids how he would wit us. He talks to my partner about animals and everything about them cos he likes that too but some stuff if he said to kids at school they wouldn't know what he was on about and like my nephew that frustrate him. I'm not into animals and if I don't know what he's talkin about he even gets quite frustrated wit me lol so its more frustrating for him. I have taught him though not to brag and critisize others as he used to a lot but more to help others. But now he tells me he gives a few kids answers just cos they ask so we've had to explain that instead of giving answers he needs to explain the questions and let them get the answers. It's good though that his teacher gets him to teach anothe child to read as it teaches him to help children as some just need more attention then others to do well :)