Advice Please

[Tren]

I have just found out that I am pregnant again with our 5 kid, while on the Mirena so it was obviously not planned. It was a bit of a shock as the success rate is supposed to be 99.9%. We have our whole medical centre finding it very funny.

Anyway, my husband and i and kids have got our heads round it all and are actually now quite happy and excited about having another one.

But unfortunately, there are a lot of people out there who find it there business to say its just too many, or that we won't cope and just about every other negative comment there is. Even I am now starting to think that maybe I won't have enough love for it and shouldn't be having it.

What should I be saying back in these circustances?

Thanks

Tren

[au01]

Hi Tren,

Congratulations :yelclap:
Personally I wouldn't be too worried about others comments it's none of thier business.
Some people just feel they have the right to make judgment about others lives.
The only thing that matters is that you and your family are happy. :yes:
As you said the marina is 99.9% effective so I think it is meant to be.

[Angelmist♥]

Honestly, if you and your husband are excited about it tell them it's none of their business.It's not them that are bringing this child into this world.It's not them who will have to feed,love and care for this child.

Of course you will have enough love, you have enough for the previous 4 don't you?

[FourAngelKisses]

Congratulations to you all!!!

I thought you might find this website useful http://www.plomp.com/largefam/comebacks.htm

As for what other people think, it's none of their damn business. Large families are wonderful!!! The more the merrier. :yes:

[KarniF00l]

Congratulations!!!!

Don't let these people get to you. They don't live with you so therefore why should they have an opinion on you and your DH's family.

Me being 24 with 4 children i use to get negetive comments from my family all the time which i use to cop it on the chin but since i spoke up about how i felt about my family, not one thing is ever mentioned since then. I grew the back bone because i had enough.

I can see how this could be frustrating for you but just remember it's you and your DH who loves/cares/feeds/raises ect your children not them!

[InSaneOne]

i would tell them to get lost. it is none of their business how many kids you and your hubby want to have.

[FourAngelKisses]

I know that when my mum told me off for this pregnancy, I felt like having another 1 or 2 just to spite her......not that they would be unwanted of course. I may as well seeing how my current 5 seater car will soon be able to seat 8, hehe.

Things people say do hurt, and I think that the people who say them can't love kids and being a mum as much as you do. KWIM?? So go forth and multiply!! :laughing:

[All 4 Boys]

I know how you feel! I am 28 and have 4 boys under 7 and when I go out I actually get dirty looks of older people, and granted I don't look like I am 28 but my children are not being naughty but people are really negative towards me as if my beautiful boys were not planned. I often get the "well gee, try and have a good day", or "oh my god you poor thing", "oh you've got your hands full". And my fav. trying for a girl were you? I wish people would keep their comments to themselves I chose to be a parent of 4 children regardless of if they were male or female but people treat me like it must of been an accident. What a pitty they don't actually get to see how wonderful it is to be me with my family of 4 beautiful boys. Speeking of number 5, I have had a tubal ligation but would love to maybe go for n umber five in a few years. Has anyone had one reversed or tried IVF after tubal ligation?

[*Sparkles*]

It amazes me how much society has changed their views in the last 30 or so years. Back in the 1960's and earlier it was nothing for families to be large, my DH is the youngest of 6.
These days, people seem to turn up their noses if anyone has more than 2.
I think it's great that you are having another bub, planned or not. If it's what you and your family want then enjoy every moment :thumbsup:

[MummyCharmzy]

Ignore those unwanted comments! I get sick of it too! When people 'tell me' that I'm not having any more children I laugh and tell them theres one more seat to fill in the car.

All that matters is that you and your partner are happy about it, if others arent thats there problem!

It was a big joke on us when we fell pregnant 12 weeks after Isobella was born, I was exclusively feeding her and my monthly hadn't returned so discovering I was pregnant was a huge shock... we adjusted quickly and were excited but everyone else took a while and found it rather amusing!

[Michele Crocker]

Hi,

I have five kids and when I go out with all my tribe I usually get smart alec comments like you are busy and have your hands full. I say I rather keep busy then being bored. Anyway I am now used to the remarks and totally ignore the remarks. I am now thinking of planning to TTC number 6 next March. Imagine what they will be saying then.

My husband and I decided to have this many and they should be thanking us because in the future our tribes taxes will be paying their pensions. Another thing when we grow old we will have plenty of kids who will help to look after us.

Thats what I say when they say I hope there is no more kids. I usually say that I have a eight seater and I plan to fill the car up.

Michele
Mother of Christopher, Luke, Melissa, Jayden and Ashleigh(1 next week)

[bec 1]

Hi Im expecting bub no.3 february 2007 and I was just wondering how you all manage getting out and about with the children. I have a 3 year old and 6 year old and I still want to be able to take them out during the holidays. Thank you.

[spiritedfamily]

Hi Im expecting bub no.3 february 2007 and I was just wondering how you all manage getting out and about with the children. I have a 3 year old and 6 year old and I still want to be able to take them out during the holidays. Thank you.

Management...
Fortunately baby's are very versatile (especially 3 onwards) they fit into the family well and are usually happy to get out & about. The way I've managed from 3 onwards has been to put the baby in a sling, pouch,etc...whatever is the most comfortable for you...so that you are free to watch out for your toddler without leaving baby unattended in a pram.

There are certain things that I have had to sacrifice...perhaps not going to the movies as often but then we visit parks more...so there is always something you can do...its just might mean changing the focus.

[FourAngelKisses]

I try to go out and about when the older 2 are at school. The grocery shopping gets done when they are at school, so they only come with me on school holidays. As DH is a shift worker, he manages to come with me every 3wks, so there is a good chance that I don't have to take all 3 of them every week of the holidays.
If I do take them alone, I give them a shopping list or something so that they can help, or I bribe them by saying they can have a lollipop or something if they behave themselves. Generally works.

I also go first thing in the morning before they get tired and cranky.