View Full Version : ~I Want My DH To Change Jobs~
A Party of Five
No real advice...just some of these :hugs: :hugs:
I hear what you are saying. My DH is a carpenter, runs his own business. He leaves home in the dark and returns after dark and it drives me nuts!!! Even in daylight saving the workload just increases, cos it's lighter earlier - he leaves earlier, and then works later until the sun goes down :banghead:
I know he is out earning money to support his family and I'm sure he would rather be home too, but it is frustrating isn't it!!
How does he feel about changing jobs?? I agree - to have them home for two days on the w/end would be fantastic!!! For some reason Saturdays and Sundays are that little bit more frustrating with kids on your own!!
Hope it works out for you. I also think waiting til he's had the holidays is a good idea.
Big ((Hugs)) your way hun.
My dp isnt working at the moment:rolleyes: And while that can be a pain in the rear. having the extra pair of hands around whenever i need it is wonderful, and im actually not looking forward to him heading off to work, once he finds a suitable job.
He was working 2 jobs. leaving at 5.30am in the morning, and returning near 7pm.
Luckily he did have most of saturday home, and all of sunday.
11 days on. and 3 off sounds pretty full on.
How does he feel about changing jobs?? i dont think you are being unfair. But he has to agree to it.
Wish you all the best :)
:hugs: for you.
Try to talk to him. Tell him that you really appreciate him to be a good bread winner. But also ask him doesn't he feel upset that he misses the kids and you? He might still remember the first one being born and it's nearly school starting shortly! Explain him that HE misses out. And it won't be his boss or his clients that will be with him should he become ill, upset, depressed and it also not them to share his happiness. It's the family. Point out that you realise that job is important to him and not just because of money so you just asking him to change and not give up. Tell him how much you miss him and remind that children really need their father. There are some things mothers simply can't give. Even the best mothers.
I'd assume the above would make him feel acknowledged, appreciated and important enough to make him change the priorities.
it is tough, because your dh loves his job, so why change. he earns money with this job, and he likes what he does.
i do not think his hours are too bad, sure 11 days straight is a bit rough, but by the same token- he HAS a job.
my dh works long hours ect. we have 3 kids as well and while i sometimes donīt really like it (i had to move twice- overseas and interstate- because of his job) i do appreciate him doing his best in earning money, so we can have a good life.
i, personally, would never tell my dh to change his job, as he too, loves what he does.
i would talk to your dh and tell him how you feel- and donīt forget- being pregnant always makes you a bit hormonal (at least me :) )
good luck and all the best:thumbsup:
it is tough, because your dh loves his job, so why change.
May be making his wife feeling better and help more with so many children and actually watch them grow aren't bad reasons...
thats totally right.
but it also is his life. sure, it is his kids, too, you will say. and good point. but at the end of the day, what if he changes, for the family, but only getting a job he doesnīt really like, and later regretting the step?
of course main priority should be the family, but this family also needs money- and a happy dad :) (of course and mummy and kiddies :) )
I want my DP to change jobs too - he's an apprentice chef, which not only means super-long hours (10am-10pm shifts, 5 days a week...and that's not including travel time or anything), but a pathetic pay! He gets about $300-$375 a week. Pathetic for all that work he does!
I only RECENTLY admitted to DP that I wished he had a 9-5 job, with weekends off. Because of his shocking hours, it means there's less I can do. I mean, I'd REALLY like to join a gym and lose weight, but I can't, because I can't find someone to watch DD while I go there. If he had a regular job, I'd just go after he got home from work...or on weekend mornings.
It'd also mean that we lived "regular hours". Because he works late, his body-clock is different to the average persons. He sleeps in to about middday on his days off, and then we go to bed after midnight. DD and I do the same thing (well, she goes to bed at 9.30pm-10pm), so that we can see more of him. It makes going to the shops/seeing friends/etc difficult - because they're usually up before us, and in bed before us.
The reason I haven't REALLY addressed this with DP is because I want him to be happy. I don't want to be some nazi control-freak, who tells him what jobs he can/can't do. He's fairly happy in the hospitality industry, and the hours are just something that come with it. I don't want to make him feel bad about doing something that makes him unhappy...so I just bare with it.
In a few years I might mention it, and want him to make a few changes (maybe moving to a smaller, less "posh" restaurant would mean less hours?)...but for now I'll just suck it up.
since we have have had children my DH has worked long hours. I dont like it some times but when we talk about it he say's it for our furture if we want the things we dream of. And thats the way i look at it now. at the moment we works weekday and on saturday so we only have sunday free. but he has been offered a better job at the same place it's more money but he works from 4pm till 12am mon to fri and we have our weekends back he wont start that till the 23rd of oct. we have two girls under 3 and i hat being alone at night so i will see how i go. hope you work it out with your DH.
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