Hungry baby

[Lolo]

My son will be 4 months next week, and I have been (almost) exclusivley breastfeeding him, even after i have returned to work. I have been full time at work (8am-4pm) for 2 weeks now and it has been tough to pump at work and have enough for each day. My mother in law looks after him during the day and she lives quite far away, so he is basically away from me from 6.30am till 4.30 pm. I feed him at 5.30am and he pretty much eats every three hours. I feed him again around 5 and before and after bathtime.

The problem is, my mother in law just told me that baby is getting very hungry and cries so much that she "needs" to feed him 4 times when he is with her (i make 2 bottles of 160ml and 1 bottle 180ml) for the day. So she is having to supplement with formula. He has also been waking at night whingeing to eat (I try to settle him before I feed him, but it usually ends with him nursing at about 3am). When I feed him during weekday afternoons, he cries and pulls off my breast and takes a while to settle down.

When he's with me, I feed him whenever he seems hungry. How can I figure out how much to feed him when he's away from me. It is so difficult at my work for me to pump twice a day. (i also pump twice after he's asleep), I don't know if i can pump enough for the day.
My question is: what is going on? and what should i do to feed baby adequately? Could my milk supply be low when i am nursing him?
By the way, during weekends, he doesnt usually wake up at night as on weekdays.

Please help, its so confusing, and I want to try hard not to supplement with formula.

thank you in advance

[Pinky McKay]

Dear Lolo,
You are doing an AMAZING job!

One thing that may explain your baby's night-waking on work days is that often babies get into a reverse cycle of feeding when they are separated from mum during the day -it is not just about the milk, but about your presence. Babies need mama as much as they need milk. Your baby may well be hungry or thirsty during the day but he may also need the comfort of your milk.

One way to address this is, when your baby wakes on work nights it would be better to simply feed him rather than try and re-settle him without a feed- take him into your bed and nurse and cuddle when he wakes. This way, he will get mama cuddles, your milk supply will be boosted/ he will get 'good' milk because prolactin levels are highest at night and you will get rest as he nurses. If he has this extra feed at night, he may not seem so hungry during the day. (think in terms of him needing a certain amount of food in 24 hours).

Regarding the afternoon difficulties as you try and breastfeed -your exhaustion may be slowing your letdown a little and compared to a faster flowing bottle which your baby has had during the day, he may get alittle frustrated. By allowing him to nurse during the night as suggested, you will be counteracting any association with the bottle as being 'easier'

In just a couple of months ( although it must seem ages away right now -I'm sure you are living one day at a time!), your baby will be able to have a little solid food so may 'stretch out' during the day until you are there to breastfeed him.

It is also a legal issue that breastfeeding mothers should be allowed to take expressing breaks at work -you don't elaborate on the issues - whether it is more about your work than your workplace -that an extra expressing is hard to manage, but if it is due to an inconsiderate environment/ management, it would be worth negotiating by explaining you only need this break for a short period, until your baby is on solids.

Hang in there , you are a legend to juggle work and breastfeeding so well!

Pinky