*~*4 year old mummies chat*~*

[headoverfeet]

Hello mummies of beautiful 4 year olds :wave: I thought I would kick this section off. I have DS1 who turned 4 back in September and who has started kindy this year :D I would love to chat with other mummies (or daddies) who have 4 year olds as well, I'm pretty sorted on my younger 2 children but would love some guidance with my oldest! We're currently trying to sort out some toileting issues which I think we have finally figured out :fingerscrossed: he hasn't done #2 in his pants in a week!

So how are the other little people going? Settling into kindy or prep well?

[Littlemissmetal]

:wave: Thermo

I have a 4yr old little man too, he only just turned 4 earlier this month. So far I am loving his age, he is learning so much new stuff daily and is a real pleasure. The only major problems we seem to have with him is he tends to lash out instead of using his words, he has a 2yr old brother that likes to push his buttons at the best of times and usually it results in K hitting or pushing DS2, he knows he has done wrong because he will apologize straight away, but he will still recieve a time out because we have zero tolerance of violence in this house, I constantly remind him he needs to use his words which will work for a short time after but he will forget and lash out again, it drives me insane because DS2 can give it quite good aswell and it seems like they are constantly fighting even though they both adore each other :freakingout:

K doesn't stary prep until next year, though he is in kindy twice a week which he really enjoys and is learning so much from them!

[headoverfeet]

Hi Milktini! I hear you on the fighting front, DS1&2 (who is 3 yrs) are at it several times a day, like you we have a zero tolerance for violence and it's straight to time out as well :yes:

He is loving kindy too and goes 5 days a fortnight (3 one week and 2 the next) he is very much like his dad though, doesn't want to talk about it straight away and prefers to chat after dinner while I'm trying to put his brother and DD to bed lol makes it tricky!

[madjedjjlill]

Hi, I have a 4 year old ds who started kindy this year after being home with me his whole little life, the first 3 weeks were very hard for him with tears every morning, week 4 he actually gave me a kiss an hug with no tears an a bye mummy :)

[Bubbalugs#2]

Hi M :)

Great topic.
My four year old is loving Kindy. Although has been home sick this week. Glad to hear C is enjoying it.
We are having a few problems with Z knowing his boundaries etc, both at home and kindy. Also he practically refuses to go to the bathroom at Kindy...trying to work on both of these issues.

[Jensha]

Hi :) my dd is 4 started prep this year and is doing so well (apart from bickering with friends sometimes) she's learning so much and loves it but I'm so excited for holidays :)

[Lock and Lu]

Hi there. I have a 4 year old DD. She also started preschool this year.

We have some issues with behaviour. I think she's quite a 'spirited' child so I'm reading the book and trying to learn some skills and tricks to deal with her - otherwise I spend half my life telling her off and yelling, which is definitely not the way I want to parent. Unfortunately it seems to be getting worse as she gets older though!

She's been talking over the past couple of days about preschool things like 'B doesn't want to be my best feiend' 'B didn't want to sit next to me at lunch'. Had anyone else had to deal with this yet? Any tips? I had hoped I'd have a few years to deal with this kind of crap between girls!

[lulululu]

My eldest is 4 in 3 weeks. Can I join too?

[Mummabearto2]

My DS will be 4 in August and definately challenging at the moment. I'm also finding the older he gets the more challenging he becomes. Perhaps its because they have more of a vocabulary for backchat!!!! At the moment I feel like we are constantly having battles over almost everything. Its driving me mad. He is very strong willed and doesn't give up easily. I also think he is still adapting to sharing his mummy with DD who is 8.5 months and is therefore maybe acting up???
He goes to daycare 2 times a week. They run a kinder program there and he loves it.

[Littlemissmetal]

:wave: lulululu course you can join :)

lock and lu - which book are you reading? My boys are very spirited also, would love to be able to read up and learn different methods of dealing with it.

[Lock and Lu]

I'm reading 'raising your spirited child'. It's fantastic. It has heaps of practical advice and is very responsive and respectful of your child's innate personality, rather than trying to 'fix' or 'change' them. It helps most of the time. I can highly recommend it and think it would be useful for anyone needing help with behaviour.

Mammabear, I agree that younger siblings can exasserbate things. DD often acts up when I'm giving DS (13 months) attention. She also hurts him a lot which makes me cranky and she's guaranteed a reaction for me!

[My Beloved Ones]

Hi everyone
I have a 4 yr old DS (turns 5 in october eeek!). Since the begining of this year DS I think has been experiencing a testosterone surge. One minute he will be full of rage for no reason at all the next he's sooky needy and clingy. My boy was never aggresive in any sense of the word, infact he is quite timid and shy. But the last couple of months he has changed so much. Has any on else experienced this?

[Lock and Lu]

I haven't experienced it personally but a friend of mine has recently gone through it with her DS who is 5 in September. She said it was pretty awful and a lot of his anger was targeted at her and she found it really draining. I'm not sure exactly what she did (I can ask her though) but he seems to have come out the other side of it...so at least there's hope that it will end.

[CluckySC]

I'll join too :D

DS1 just turned four the other week. We're homeschooling so no kindy for us, but we are doing lots of craft, reading, experiments and exploring. He's also obsessed with cooking at the moment.

Anyone else's little one majorly into Lego??

He's just getting interested in going along to some of the homeschooling meetups, so we're about to start that. I can't wait. Am thinking of trying him with a relaxed drama class for fun but he currently tends to fight against structured classes at the moment so we'll see.

My beloved ones - yep, DS1 is going through this too. He's spirited anyway but is generally a gentle loving kid... Then other times he'll have periods of being loud, aggressive and generally go out of his way to drive me mad :rolleyes:

[Myztiks#1Fan]

Evening all. Thought i would join in here too as only just saw this area existed. Only got 3 more months til he is 5 though.

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[~Bec~]

Subscribing - my DS is 4 but that will be changing in June!! He was due to start prep this year but we have held him back for a year due to a speech delay and other developmental delays.

[bellalika]

My big boy turned 4 two weeks ago. He started kinder this year. He separated fine and has settled in well. He has been having problems using his words appropriately and resilience. The teacher has mentioned a possibility of a second year of kindy that we are open to. The decision will be made as the year progresses.

We are also having serious toilet training issues. He had a bit of water splash after #2s and has refused to go on the toilet since. Night toilet training has been a disaster.

There have also been issues at home that have affected him. He has chewed his nails to past stubs due to anxiety.

Well, those are the negatives. He is otherwise extremely talkative. If he runs out of things to say he'll tell me he loves me and that I am the best Mummy in the whole wide world. He fight with his little brother but really loves him and defends him when other kids have a go. He is clever, but not to genius level. I could go on with this list but I won't. I love my big boy.

[My Beloved Ones]

Thankyou Lock and Lou, if you could ask her about any tips she's got to get through it that would be great! Ive been scouring the net to try and find a book about raising boys but am yet to come across one. Does anyone have any recomendations??

Clucky- Atleast someone else is in the same boat! With my DS he can get really cranky quite quickly over nothing. Something as simple as asking him to repeat what he has said can sometimes make him quite frustrated and cranky. Other times he is reallly sooky with me. Not so much with DH. DS wants to be near me 90% of the time, wants me to pick him up, cuddle, kiss, tells me that he loves me 10 times a day. That part Im not complaining about :goodvibes: but it worries me abit that his moods change so quickly when he never used to be like that. And the lying!! All of a sudden he is lying all the time! Over silly nonsense little things that are no big dea. Even if I saw him with my own two eyes he's still swear black and blue he didnt do it! Grrr. Im cautious on how to handle this as I dont want to encourage it accidently if you know what I mean. Oh besides all of that though he really is a lovely sweet kind caring gorgeous boy!
What is your DS doing?

[Myztiks#1Fan]

Bella, i am trying to TT a 3yr old and encourage him to go by feeding the fish coz if he poops the fish will eat as i told him the fish wait at the bottom of the toilet pipe but his mum isnt quite on board yet. He has sat on the toilet a few times but no poo as of yet.

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[~Bec~]

Hi - have you read "Raising Boys"? It's an excellent book :)

ETA: I clicked to quote My Beloved One's post - how strange it didn't work.

[Aquillah]

Can I join this area?

DS1 has just turned 4 and is a very lovable, well mannered, active and excitable 4 yr old which seems to be too much for some people.:rolleyes:

We are having issues with Kindy and them thinking something is wrong and he needs to be tested. Well, I did Kindy helper for the first time the other day and I can see what the issue is. The teacher is temporary for the term and is boring as batsh!t! My DS was trying his hardest to keep still and listen but after more than 30 minutes on the mat he was not interested (as most children are not). He likes to be silly (at times) runs alot of the time, his spatial awarness isnt very good and can't follow complex instruction that he does not usually do.


He is not like this at home as much anymore as we have worked on sharing, walking inside, using manners, listening and appropriate behaviour. I have bought up these issues with the health nurse and she thinks there is no issue. He is a 4 yr old boy that is acting his age and it is schol that is failing him. I have filled out a 4 yr old health checklist and he can do over 95% of it.

The ed assitant has suggested I speak to the Principal. It is well know that this teacher is not a good teacher however the other kids in the class are not excitable, high spirited little darlings (well, two other kids are and I am speaking to their parents this week about it all) and I am trying to decide the best way to go about it all. I am off to the health nurse today and am thinking of getting her to write a letter stating she is not concerned about his behaviour (neither is our GP who sees my DS a bit and is very well respected) and going from there.


I have just ordered 'Raising Your Spirited Child" and have read 'Raising Boys".
I am good at pre empting his behaviour and keeping him busy or diverting him when I see a tantrum brewing. This would be my biggest concern I will be bringing up today (him controlling himself in large groups) He is getting better but I feel like such a failure at times.

Anyhoo, good to be with a group of people in the know!;)Clucky and I have had some good chats and feeling some of the same issues.

[BigW]

Hi Ladies!
I have a four year old little man too! And an almost 7 year old son and a 3 year old son :)
I don't mind offering some experience and advice on these male varieties if you want to ask me? I have been told my kids are great, well rounded men so far..... (not half proud!)
I am having poo issues with master four, not sure if he's constipated or just hangs on and hangs on at the moment.....six pairs of jocks today......been toilet trained for over 12 months now. Tearing my hair out. 10 months of toilet training initially was enough!!! Mast 3 toilet trained himself prior to Xmas at 2yrs 8 mths (thank goodness!!!)
Anyhow, DS is a kindy boy five mornings, as is his younger brother. He will start school in May. :smiliedance:
Jut wanted to say testosterone surges are totally normal, lots of tiredness and smetimes anxiety, lots of testing behaviours. All I can say is routine and boundaries to make them feel safe are key factors here.
Any questions regarding boys, please ask away! :)

[allforthem]

Hi there. I have a 4 year old DD. She also started preschool this year.

We have some issues with behaviour. I think she's quite a 'spirited' child so I'm reading the book and trying to learn some skills and tricks to deal with her - otherwise I spend half my life telling her off and yelling, which is definitely not the way I want to parent. Unfortunately it seems to be getting worse as she gets older though!

She's been talking over the past couple of days about preschool things like 'B doesn't want to be my best feiend' 'B didn't want to sit next to me at lunch'. Had anyone else had to deal with this yet? Any tips? I had hoped I'd have a few years to deal with this kind of crap between girls!

OMG you seriously just described my dd. She is also very "spirited" and this cr*p at kindy with best friends etc drives me mental!!! I wonder if that has anything to do with her behaviour at home. I cant imagine what its like to have to deal with all those big kid emotions at 4 years old. We just keep reassuring her that shes amazing and wonderful and that everybody can be friends, we dont need "best friends" yet.

[xRJx]

Hi Everyone,

I thought I might join ye if that's ok? I have a four old daughter who is a grand little girl. Very bright (read: she hears and sees all, and will get you in trouble!) and happy. I have another girl aged 2 and they seem to enjoy tormenting each other. Their favourite game is "lets pretend this is the only toy we own and beat the bejaysus out of each other for it".

I am a stay at home mam, so that means I wander aimlessly around Coles for about 4 hours a week, I laugh shrilly when people say 'you've got your hands full there har har", and I drink in the afternoons. Only kidding, just Fridays.

I just moved to Perth from Ireland and I love it :) hope I make some new friends here.

RJ x