Hypothetically- what would it take

[mummykitty]

For you to 'sign off' on a medically necessary circumcision, at what point do you consider it medically necessary and would you automatically consider circ or look for an alternate even if it was a little more involved/ expensive etc.


- dp and I were talking about this after I read the 'death from circumcision thread' and I'd said I'd need a second opinion from doctors at different hospitals as a minimum to consider circumcising my son.. Dp is a little less inclined to question doctors but I'd rather question and know all my options and i cannot see a situation re circ where that would be a problem ;). So this got me thinking, what would it take for other anti circ mums/ dads/ families to consider it and at what point do you consider it medically necessary surgery as opposed to a cosmetic procedure :)

[mummykitty]

Oh for those who are anti ric and did make the difficult decision to circ what helped you get to that point :)

PLEASE keep it respectful and remember each person makes this decision based on what they thought was best and most appropriate to help their son (as we are only talking medically necessary, those who did RIC please refrain from commenting as the situations aren't really interchangeable :) thanks)

[Janesmum123]

I would get a second opinion firstly. If it would cause him pain not having it done then of course I would do it. I mean if there was an actual medical reason for it then I would do it. Otherwise stay away from other peoples penises.

[AM]

Luckily I've not been in this situation with my 3 boys, but my ex had the condition where his foreskin was so tight he could not urinate as a bub, so 'some' of his foreskin was taken off to allow proper urination.

I guess with me it would be the same criteria as any other medical procedure, that it were absolutely necessary for continued quailty of life, and every other less invasive avenue had been exhausted...

[Lovemyfam]

For me it would have to be a life or death, or a fix it or lose the whole penis pretty much. I would hate to have to do it even if medically needed I would have trouble after from guilt.

[Bell & Bug]

If it were a recurring issue and the only way to make it go away for good were to remove it then so be it.

[SassyMummy]

If a doctor recommended it to me. If I didn't understand exactly why he/she made that suggestion, I'd get a second opinion. If they suggested the same thing... then I would.

[Witwicky]

I would exhaust non-evasive methods, as AM said.

And I would definitely get a second opinion - I would for most procedures.

[Opinionated]

I would exhaust non-evasive methods, as AM said.

And I would definitely get a second opinion - I would for most procedures.
This, as well as a third opinion, one being from a paediatric urologist.

[Penny88]

For me it would depend on the age of my son as well. If the condition came up while he's still very little then I'd go with a second opinion and then go from there. If he's a bit older then the less inclined I be to take even two doctors opinions as I think it would be even more traumatic.

[Father]

This, as well as a third opinion, one being from a paediatric urologist.

It is worth remembering that the number of opinions received will be directly proportional to the length of time that your boy may be in extreme pain.

It is easy to say that you will go to x number of doctors until you actually look into your sons face and see the pain that he is going through with his 'problem'. At the end of the day, you will do what your heart tells you to do. You will do what you think is best for him. If this means taking the first opinion and fixing the problem ASAP - then so be it. If this means waiting for years in hope that it fixes itself - then so be it. Only you, as the parent, can decide what you think is best for your child based on the circumstances. There are no right or wrong answers here - although that doesn't seem to stop people here insisting that they are right and other opinions are WRONG!:)

[mummykitty]

Father please stay out this section this is the anti circ section. Ta

[Father]

Father please stay out this section this is the anti circ section. Ta

You mean the section that is:
"For those who wish to put in writing their objections to this procedure and explain why they feel this way."?

This topic was after a discussion about when you would consider a circ. I would suggest that this is then better suited in the discuss it section. Maybe the moderators will move it?
Either way, I believe that my post answers the question an appropriate tone.

[Myztiks#1Fan]

I am a fence sitter on circ but i think i would get quite a few different opinions from doctors. I would get referrals to whoever i could. I would hope it never had to happen but if it ever did, i would hope that coop would be old enough to tell me the amount of pain he was in and if anything helped to ease the pain at all.

Sent from my GT-I9000T using BubHub

[Boobycino]

I'd be getting a second opinion, but yeah if it's a matter of him in pain or risk, and there's no alternative, then absolutely.

[mummykitty]

You mean the section that is:
"For those who wish to put in writing their objections to this procedure and explain why they feel this way."?

This topic was after a discussion about when you would consider a circ. I would suggest that this is then better suited in the discuss it section. Maybe the moderators will move it?
Either way, I believe that my post answers the question an appropriate tone.

As I am the op I can safely say it's in the correct section, it is for those who are ANTI circ and what it would take for them to consider it. I specifically requested those who aren't anti circ not answer as it's not comparable to the many things a mother/ father feels when they go against something they so strongly believe in for a true medical reason. Someone who is ok with circ is unlikely to push for more opinions etc. Judging from a few of your posts you don't belong in this section and I'm sure this question isn't applicable to you and you cannot provide the op (me) with the types of responses being requested

[RaryGirl]

Please lets keep on topic.

This is the anti section, everyone needs to respect which section the OP has chosen to post the question in.

OP if you would like a discussion on the topic please PM me and I will move the thread.



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Sent from my mobile device ... please excuse the typing missed cakes.

[BlissedOut]

I'd be seeing a specialist. I'm happy to fork out for a private appointment to get in the next day if it means peace of mind that I'm doing the best thing for my son.

Much like I would with any other surgery.

[RaryGirl]

Last time ... this is NOT the discuss it section - thread will be closed if it continues off topic.


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Sent from my mobile device ... please excuse the typing missed cakes.

[bellalika]

OP, if my son had a condition that was causing him genuine pain, not just discomfort, and circ would rectify the problem? I would do it. If it was just discomfort I would seek more opinions, explore other options etc.

[Regina Phalange]

I would treat my decision to have a medically nessecary circ like I would any other neccesary medical procedure, it should be no different to any other surgery in my mind. I wouldn't have my child's appendix taken out 'just in case'. But if my child's appendix was about to burst, I wouldn't try alternative methods of fixing it, have 4 different doctors opinions, or wait until they are old enough to decide for themselves, I would get it fixed.

Similarly, if they had a medical issue with their p3nis that was causing them pain, I would fix it straight away. If it was something that caused discomfort or would cause future issues, I would look into when is the best time in their life to fix it, if it wasn't urgent.

A friend of mine's DS was born with a problem with his p3nis - I think that the p3nis was fully attached all the way down the shaft to the scrotum - I'm not sure exactly of what the problem was. He would have never been able to have s3x or get an er3ction if they didn't fix it, & his p3nis wouldn't have been able to form and grow properly as he got older. The procedure was similar to circing. They did it at about 8 months of age under general ananasthetic based on the advise of the dr and specialist that this was the best time to get it done (best not when he was newborn because it still had to develop a little bit more but if he was older it would have become more disformed). In the same situation, I would have made the same decision.

[GluttonForPunishment]

Have never waded into the circ section before. Hot topic, isn't it!! Geez!

Well, I am "intact" and any son that I have will be also. I've made it this far without it falling off, I figure that it's ok. Amazingly, without a doctor's interference and unnecessary surgery, it still does everything it's supposed to do! Why remove a body part on a what if? I don't get it. Mum ensured that I knew to clean properly etc and I have never had a drama.

Anyway, to the topic. I would need solid proof and probably three different doctor's opinions before I would think about it. I don't tend to take doctor's words for things anymore. Untrusting soul I am! lol.

[TripleTime]

WOuld have to be life or death & after every other option had been exhausted.

[mummykitty]

GFP- wow a dads opinion :D I'm glad you waded in here :). Most guys I know are pretty meh on the topic and unlikely to talk to me about it all anyway (penis talk to a cute girl seems to make guys nervous, throw on children and they run ;) )


Thankyou to all who have responded the general idea seems to be multiple opinions after all other options have been exhausted which is where I myself sit :). To those who have made the heartbreaking decision I truly am sorry you were put in that position and I hope things are going well with it all now :goodvibes:

[Nowhere]

I would take it th same as any other surgery I have with my child I would asses the risks speak to all the necessary drs involved and make the decision if time permitted.

If it was a medical emergency and it needed doing to avoid immediate problems of death I would just sign the forms and hope to god things turned out right. Not always do we have time to getas much info s we need when little ones need surgery, I know dds last two operations have been decided that day and needed doing

[Benji]

I would never have RIC performed on any baby boy of mine but I'm very understanding that sometimes there are problems that need addressing. I'd have it done if it was causing DS pain, continuous discomfort that creams/other options weren't fixing, or, as he got older, if he suffered phimosis and the cream didn't help as that affects not only comfort but also s3xuality and self-esteem. I'd obviously want his input as he gets older as to whether he wanted it done or not.

[mummykitty]

Benji- :goodvibes: his input is a wonderful thing to seek :yes: may I ask at what age you'd feel he could have input and how you feel you'd beat explain to him his options?:)

I suspect if my son needed doing I would talk it over with him and hopefully get his input too :) of course I'm at a loss as to how to have that conversation so hoping it won't come up ;)

ETA: nowhere- I hope your dd is doing ok now :yes: :hugs:

[GluttonForPunishment]

GFP- wow a dads opinion :D I'm glad you waded in here :). Most guys I know are pretty meh on the topic and unlikely to talk to me about it all anyway (penis talk to a cute girl seems to make guys nervous, throw on children and they run ;) )

Lol. Really? That surprises me. Thought penis talk would be something that most guys want to talk to a cute girl about! :laughing:

Oh I'm gonna pay for that.... :(

Seriously though, since joining this forum I've only now come to realise how powerful topics like vax, circ and abortion are. I mean, I knew opinion was split, but some of the threads get downright nasty don't they! I'm quite the peacemaker so I avoid those ones. I still get surprised though!

[mummykitty]

Lol. Really? That surprises me. Thought penis talk would be something that most guys want to talk to a cute girl about! :laughing:

Oh I'm gonna pay for that.... :(

Seriously though, since joining this forum I've only now come to realise how powerful topics like vax, circ and abortion are. I mean, I knew opinion was split, but some of the threads get downright nasty don't they! I'm quite the peacemaker so I avoid those ones. I still get surprised though!

:laughing: apparently it is until they realize I'm devoted to my dp and won't cheat on him ;) then it's considered teasing apparently :rollseyes:

Any topic where opinions are strong and values is bound to get heated I just wish it didn't get so nasty this thread mostly seems ok though other than my minor dummy spit at a pp

[catemer]

Personally I think if nature has made it that way then thatbis how it should stay. But if there was some sort of problem - medical not cosmetic- then I would trust my future son's specialist in their opinion. Also, depending on my future son's age I would get his input.

I have 2 story's from growing up related to this.
First my cousin - always got himself into troubles- slipped down a creek embankment and got a stick impaled through his f0resk!n. He pulled it out himself too embarrassed to tell anyone what had happens, but didn't treat it and it got so infected that it had to be surgically repaired. He was 13 at the time and decided that rather than have a lopsided skin, he asked the surgeon to make it neat and even all around.

Secondly my brother's best friend had to have a circa at the age of 7 for medical reasons. I don't remember exactly what was wrong, but from memory it was too small and was causing significant pain, discomfort and urinary infections etc. Nothing seemed to fix it and the poor boy was constantly down in the dumps. Turned out his p3nis was causing him so much pain and discomfort that he wasn't getting any enjoyment out of life. Once he had the surgery it was as though he was a completely different boy. He could now run without his bits hurting, so he could play sports at school, his social life picked up because he could now play team sports and wasn't in constant pain.

So for me if my son had some sort of trauma or some sort of problem affecting other aspects of his life, then I would trust what the specialists said and, in consultation with my son, allow the surgery.