View Full Version : how do you do it on your own?
So it looks like hubby is starting FIFO on wednesday...
What do I do? How do I explain to my little guy who will be devastated? How do I get them both to bed?
Missy2579
08-10-2011, 21:37
I know how you feel.. I went through this with my two little ones when my husband did FIFO. Away for 12 days and home for only 4. It did the first day or so for them to 'get used' to him again but eventually it got better and better. I actually think it was harder on my than the kids, as we all know that kids adapt way better than adults!!! From experience, you need to be honest with the kids before hand and tell them that daddy is going to work and he will be home in how ever many days. Everyday we marked the calendar off and had a bed time story. I think the key was routine. Good Luck. I am lucky now as my husband is no longer doing FIFO. Good luck!!! :hugs: :yes:
happygirl1982
08-10-2011, 21:38
May I ask what fifo stands for?
I have been doing it alone for 6 months now. It is challenging in the beginning, but it does get easier!
I have a strict routine with my boys, especially after 5pm. Dinner is always served up at 6. Then bath or shower, I usually jump in the shower with the kids. Book and bed. My boys are now sleeping in the same room so I don't have to ferry back and forth.
The first day is always the worst, every week tbh. But I just count down and appreciate how well we are coping. Ds1 has started to realise that daddy is at work but he will be back soon. Loves it when he drives in the driveway.
Good luck! It is hard in the beginning, but it all gets easier!
May I ask what fifo stands for?
Fly in fly out :)
It's different for us as he has always done FIFO so we are used to it.
I try not to remember the horror nights in DS2's first year where I'd be laying in DS1's bed, patting him and boobing the bub. We have a bit of issue now as DS2 is a major daddy's boy so he sometimes wants him to put him to bed, it's hard. But DH is in a job that he is able to call us once or twice in the day and we call him at bedtime.
It's not all bad! The time off is awesome, we get so much more family time than most :) And the money is good.
PM me any specific questions if you like or we could meet up somewhere :)
You'll do fine hun. DP used to do FIFO when DS was 1 and as he grew up, it became a novelty going to the airport and picking DP up and talking to him on the phone about EVERYTHING he did that day etc. The kids will adjust fine, its just you that you need to worry about.
Give yourself a bit of extra time to get routines sorted and soon it will become second nature :)
MummyHas3boys
08-10-2011, 21:56
Aww you will be fine :)
I know it is really scary and daunting at first, but just get yourself z good routine going and you will be ok!
My hubby does DIDO, 1 week on 1 week off, and as much as I love him home with us, things run so much more smoothly when he is away now :laughing: I have the 3 boys in a perfect routine!
Goodluck :)
Guest1234
08-10-2011, 22:01
deleted
GrabbyCrabby
08-10-2011, 22:40
I'm on my phone, and can't see how old your son is, but I know there's a book (I've seen it in our local bookstore). It's called My Daddy Flies to Work, or something along those lines, sorry, I'm on my phone, and can't find a link for you... I hope it goes well for you all :)
Thanks guys :) the thing that worries me most is sleep... Bub is a terrible sleeper and we were supposed to go to sleep school but they screwed up our booking!
Going to have a massive cook up tomorrow so I have lots of healthy meals in the freezer
And laksa, I would love to catch up, ds is a lot more friendly now! ;)
**Mum, Dad, Big boy (Dec 08) and Baby girl (Feb 11)**
Great! Let me know when :)
Or my ABA group is having a park meet on Friday.
Both my kids were terrible sleepers, I always made DH get up early the first couple of days he was home and take them somewhere so I could nap!!
BlackCat181
09-10-2011, 09:14
DS is almost 2 and DH works 5 weeks on 1 week off at the moment. DS was missing him alot and didn't like talking on the phone to DH much, so we set up web cams and they talk and play that way now. They both love it and DS is so much happier now. Beforehand, DS didn't like going to bed, but doesnt mind so much if DH says ok, its bed time now, night night! and off DS goes.
StretchmarkBarbie
09-10-2011, 09:21
We are a FIFO family. Honestly this past year has been the hardest of my life. It's so lonely when the kids are in bed at night, and after three weeks of DH being gone you will the phone to ring just so you can chat to an adult.
Bed time is rough some nights. But I fou having a routine, but be flexible worked for us. We eat around 5:30 (if it's late, then it's late), bath from 6, stories at 6:30, 7 the younger two go to bed and DD1 and I do her homework (have to do it at this time because I'm a uni student and 4 days a week we don't get home until 4:30. )
The first few times away are the harzest. Skype hubby with the kids if you can. Seeing daddy on the laptop at nighttime is something my three love.
StretchmarkBarbie
09-10-2011, 09:24
Ok excuse the terrible spelling in that post. My phone kept freezing up
SassyMummy
09-10-2011, 13:16
DP has been doing FIFO for a couple of months now, and we just get on with life as per usual. Things get out of whack when he's back, but he's only back for 3 days a fortnight, and it's Friday, Saturday and Sunday so it doesn't mess with things too much as it's a weekend.
TBH, the worst part about it for me personally is the loneliness and having to go to bed alone. It's so weird to just lay in an empty bed, or wander the house wondering what to do because there's nobody around to talk to. We spend a lot of time together, so it's been weird not having him here all the time.
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