Is this normal?

[ElizaDee]

My boy is 4 weeks old today, when he is awake all he wants is boobie, and this can be for 2 - 5 hrs! He wants to be on them constantly. My boobs are killing me now, as they are grazed a bit from his attachment. He sucks the nipple in to where is should be so for a few secs it kills! He is also on for over 20mins and near the end it starts to hurt, kinda like there isn't any milk left and he is sucking air through. Not sure if that make sense.

The last two days he has not slept during the day not until about 6pm. And when he wakes for a feed he is up for about 3hrs, again constantly on the breast. He will not go to sleep until he falls asleep on boob and I then cuddle and pat him some more.

So is it normal for him to be wanting the boob so much? or is this an issue with his not sleeping? I am actually looking forward to when he can have awake time and not want the boob.

Am I just being used as a dummy?

[Pinky McKay]

Dear Eliza,

You are doinga sterling job meeting your bub's needs - it can be unrelenting with a newborn and so very exhausting as you recover from birth too. Some babies are very 'sucky' ( its a strong survival urge and part of seeing that mamas make enough milk too) but sometimes a constantly sucking bub may not be well attached to the breast.

It would be a good idea to get somebody to watch your baby feed , just to make sure he is attached properly and feeding well - a Lactation consultant/ baby health nurse or ABA counsellor will be able to offer tips more specifically to you and your baby

Although the breast is nature's best pacifier, babies can be helped to settle by other means than feeding too - for instance, feeding as long as it feels comfortable to you , or until baby 'comes up for air' ( it is ok to take baby off when you feel he's had a good feed - break the suction carefully with your little finger in teh side of his mouth), then pop him in a sling and head outside for a walk. This often helps bub settle - dont worry if hes a bit grizzly, usually by the time you have walked a few minutes he will settle - and the motion, fresh air and sunshine will induce sleep, and carrying him upright will help ease any tummy discomfort (which may be making him want to suck for comfort too).

Also, if you have somebody else around who doesnt smell like breastmilk, they can often hold bubby and settle him without him wanting to be constantly fed - Dad? friend? Family member? - wrap bub and walk with him - or lay him over Dads outstretched arm so bub is lying along dads arm on his tummy - this way bub doesnt startle and if he has a tummy ache it will be relieved.

To help your baby calm without constantly nursing, think in terms of 'womb service' - recreating the womb environment will be supportive as baby adjusts to life on the outside -I have all these tips in my new book Sleeping Like a Baby and 100 Ways to Calm the Crying addresses ways to help your baby calm - both have breastfeeding info that will be helpful. Sorry its rather a lot more than I can fit into a thread here.

Meanwhile accept all the help that is offered to you - and dont be afraid to ask others to help - with the house. meals etc - this stage WILL pass ( sooner if you can get some support) and remember - you are not imposing by asking for help - everyone can share the love of a baby -its a priviledge to be invited!

Hang in there,
Pinky