am I prude of do you find this unnerving too?

[babylover111]

I had just picked up a 7 yr old from ballet and we needed to stop off at coles on the way home. I walked past the magazine stand and had a look and the 7 yr old said "what are you looking at?" and i replied "just the magazines" then we were waiting in the check out line and the 40 odd man behind said "you wouldnt let your mum look at the magazines!" and I laughed and said im the nanny not the mum and he said "you two look alike" and i said "same colour hair" and he said "both good looking too" staring at her and i freaked out and turned around blocking his view of her. She luckily didnt hear him say that but I found it SO disgusting :barf:

[mysonroger]

yeah....a bit creepy.

[Little_Toad]

Tell me this.. was the guy good looking or not?

i Bet had he been handsome you would have found it flattering.

[Lirael]

i wouldnt find it flattering if he was johhny depp(my dream celeb) its really creepy regardless of what the guy looks like.:thumbsdown:

[babylover111]

He was average looking, even if he was amazingly good looking I wouldnt find it flattering because he was staring at a 7 yr old in a ballet outfit.

[~EmsMum~]

i wouldnt find it flattering if he was johhny depp(my dream celeb) its really creepy regardless of what the guy looks like.:thumbsdown:

how true :yelclap:

[jessgray]

:no: thats creepy...i would find it creepy coming from any old man....johnny depp(:thumbsup: ) or some crazy homeless man :thumbsdown:

[BubbaLicious]

Yep creepy, definately creepy! :yes:
At first I was like oh that could be harmless but staring at a 7 yr old and saying it. And the way it's said...not she's a darling or what cutie, but both good looking I would find unnerving too.

[MrsMiggins]

I dunno.... I know of a fair few harmless older men who would say something like that just to be nice. I know there are a lot of weirdos out there (unfortunately!!) but I guess I just hate to tar them all with the same brush.

If he had a leering look on his face, it might be different to than if he was just smiling adoringly.

DD is always sitting in the trolley at the supermarket beaming her killer smile at anyone & everyone & she is constantly getting adoring comments from elderly men (we live in an area where there are a lot of retired people).

Often they make some comment that they have a granddaughter around the same age, then they want to chat all about it like they were a middle-aged woman! :D I think those old blokes are quite nice actually! Hopefully we can continue to steer clear of the weirdos!!

[kymmy]

Its all in the tone.
The picture I am getting - creepy....

[babylover111]

Yeah it was in a creepy sort of tone, then afterwards while i had my back turned she looked that way and he said "shes taking a look to see if the strange man is still there"

[kymmy]

Okay, that is not only creepy, its scary....

[SamanthaJane]

Once in Coles this man came up to my mum (i was 8, my lil sis was 5) and said "your daughters are really beautiful" in a hell creepy voice... she was like "thanks" and walked off... extremely quickly... She said the man had been following her through the aisles and staring, and she was getting really freaked out.... And him saying that just topped it off... Not kool :shame:

[SassyMummy]

I think I would be grossed out...

But at the same time, he COULD have just been saying it in a nice, friendly way.

Women ALWAYS stop me in shopping centres to tell me how gorgeous DD is... and I feel fine with it (if not a bit annoyed because I'm in a hurry). But, unfairly, the few times MEN have said something similar, I get my guard up a bit. I find it creepy...even though, in hindsight, they're probably just being nice.

I guess YOU know HOW he said...tone/expression etc...so only you can really know if he WAS being creepy or whatever.

[Milliner]

I think thats creepy!

[Ana Gram]

Could it have been misguided flirting? Men are generally really bad at that stuff.

[annsam]

Yuck. Id find the comment about me flattering but not about a 7 year old. That just seems a bit sleezy IMO.

[babylover111]

Could it have been misguided flirting? Men are generally really bad at that stuff.

The thought crossed my mind, but IMO any sane guy would realise its a bit unacceptable to say that, even if it was an attempt of flirting.

[Ana Gram]

I've had many socially inept guys flirt with me by saying incredibly innapropriate things and not actually realise it. I think it's usually due to mouth not connected to brain. But go with your gut instinct on this one.

[MrsMiggins]

I've had many socially inept guys flirt with me by saying incredibly innapropriate things and not actually realise it. I think it's usually due to mouth not connected to brain. But go with your gut instinct on this one.

I seem to recall that the brain is usually connected to another body part.............. :laughing:

[~Danni~]

I get lots of comments on DD some from older men/men with kids and mostly women (of any age).... :rolleyes:

I don't generally think it is creepy BUT you kinda know in your gut when it is a little not right I think:yes: the fact that it has been playing on your mind and you felt uncomfterble says to me "yep creepy"

[2s'nuff]

Sounds creepy to me.

I have had those moments while out with DD. Sometimes things are said and it all feels fine, but sometimes I get a yucky feeling when comments are made and disappear as quickly as I can.


If he had a leering look on his face, it might be different to than if he was just smiling adoringly.

But is smiling adoringly really that? Are they adoring your child for all the wrong reasons?

It's a sad world we live in when you have to analyse how people look at your kids and things strangers say to/about your kids:confused: .

[RedPanda]

I wouldn't like it being said in front of my 7-y-o niece. "Good looking" is innappropriate to use for a child if it's also being used to compliment an adult. The two should not be included in the same compliment.

[Percy]

I think that would have bothered me as well. However i have had a few bad experieces and dont really trust anyone anymore.

The fact that you had a little girl with you is a bit creepy.

[chubbybubby]

It is a very sad world we live in nowdays though. We raise our children to trust nobody, and that men who want to be around children are evil. Thats why there is such a shortage of male teachers - they are all scared of being labelled a paedophile.

My grandfather used to help out at the local kindergarten, but as time went by, they made him feel like a pervert because he wanted to hang out with the kids. Papa was the kindest man and just loved children. He used to work at a printing place, making children's books and would delight in bringing some home for us. He had 7 grandchildren and was so good to us. I felt so sorry for him being made to feel like that. :(

[Mamaduke]

Could it have been misguided flirting? Men are generally really bad at that stuff.
This is what I think it was...and a bad choice of words...nothing more.

[cwsmum]

He was average looking, even if he was amazingly good looking I wouldnt find it flattering because he was staring at a 7 yr old in a ballet outfit.

I get really worried when I see little girls at the shops in ballet outfits, or any other outfit that is a bit 'revealing'...there are way too many weirdos out there these days. I wouldn't take my DD out like that, I wouldn't want to give them any reason to look at her. Maybe next time you have to go to the shops after you pick her up you could take a t-shirt or something for her to put over her ballet outfit? Remove what they look at then you wont have to worry...well, not as much.

I would have been a bit worried by a comment like that...I get worried when creepy old men comment on my 2 little girls, sometimes they get a strange, almost disapointed, look on their face when I point out that my 3yr old is a boy.

Don't stress too much about it all tho, chances are you'll never see the guy again.

[nemosmum]

Yep I would have to say that if YOU found it creepy then it was CREEPY, trust your instincts they are usually right, especially about this sort of thing!

[Melo]

Hmmm, yep I find it creepy.. You dont know who to trust these days and thats actually really quite sad.

[damien's mum]

Ewww Yuk.

No i too agree with you, that is quite unnerving..
What do some people think, seriously...
Glad that you thought quick and block the view, that's really gross.

[natasha]

I think men say some silly things sometimes. They don't really know the 'correct' terms to use when describing little girls.
My uncle once said to his 7 year old daughter(my neice) (who was showing off her latest gymnastics moves) infront of the whole family ....'Whoa, your'e gonna make some man very happy with moves like that, jeeze, your'e gonna have them dropping at your feet......, I know I'd love it!'!!!!!

Well, all our mouths just dropped open in disgust! He realised what he had said and was so embarressed he nearly died! I still don't get how he could say something like that, that bad i mean, but i know men get embarressed and stumble over what words are appropriate.

Its fine if i tell a mum her little girl is sooo cute, but DH wouldn't dare because of what she would think.

[natasha]

I killed this thread didn't I...........:rolleyes: :D

[babylover111]

I killed this thread didn't I...........:rolleyes: :D

:laughing: Thank you for reminding me about it! I guess it could've all been a bad choice of words in the end and me being overprotective, I dont really trust ppl :rolleyes: but then again the tone of voice.

My uncle is also someone who talks without thinking and shocks everyone around him, its more his personality but hes definately not doing it in a perverted way

[mum2bubba]

Yuck, it freaks me out when old men smile and wink or whatever it makes you feel all dirty. As for saying that about your daughter maybe he WAS just being nice but you never know these days :thumbsdown:

[Lillynix]

Oh please! I personally you're think you're making a mountin out of a molehill! People take things too seriously these days, we need to lighten up!

I have people, both men AND women of ALL ages telling me that my little girl is beautiful, gorgeous, pretty, goodlooking etc etc not once has the thought crossed my mind that the man was being "dirty/perverted" You have to stop and think, this man may very well have children of his own and was merely commenting that this little girl was beautiful, or perhaps he thought you were very goodlooking but felt a little too shy to comment directly to you, so he made a point of saying the two of you were goodlooking.

Either way, my personal opinion is that you're overreacting, a compliment, is a compliment, take it as such, nothing more nothing less.

Having said that though, I do acknowledge that there are people out there who do abuse children BUT we cannot accuse every man who comments on a goodlooking child to be one of those men.

Edit - Off topic a little but it's a very sad world when a father can't show affection for his own children in public. DH is very affectionate towards Holly, she is his first born and he wanted a girl and he cherishes the ground she walks on, yet narrow minded people, give him the filthiest looks when he shows affection towards her in pulbic. FFS people he is her damn father! Just goes to show that people have become waaaay to suspicious and while it's good to be cautious, people still need to lighten up!

There rant done, sorry to hijack your thread! LoL

[babylover111]

Would you be extra careful if a man had approached a child in a car in the same shopping area and masturbated infront of them? :thumbsdown:

[Bessie]

I have to agree with dragonfly, perhaps the little girl reminded him of someone else and so he kept staring without meaning to, I've done this before. Only the other day, I saw a little girl who looked very much like my little neice who I miss and adore, and I had to stop myself looking incase people thought I was weird.

BTW I think there are creepy men (and women too!) out there but I bet many of the real problem people are "respectable" looking and behave in a non-threatening manner. It's the ones who we don't suspect who are the ones to look out for as much as the ones who are a bit different. Lots of peadophiles have good jobs and some are even married with kids! It's a sad mark of the times that we look on older people and worry more about them, when they are already a very isolated group in society and could do with a bit of social interaction.

I'm not sure about the shopping centre thing though, it would make me think twice but I'd rather give someone the benefit of the doubt, it's not like I would be inviting that person to spend time with us. I'd always make sure my children were close by whichever shops I use.