4yr old wont sleep at bedtime

[iamLilysmummy]

my DD is 4. and iv tryd EVERYTHING i can think of to get her to sleep.. bedtime routine starts at 6pm shower just before 7pm, then watchs home and away (watched it since she was a baby) im either up n down like a yoyo or yelling out to get bak in bed or she comes out to me 20 times 'i cant sleep' she will lay in her bed till 3am. then fall asleep. iv tryd running her up n down the yard to wear her out, warm milk, no t.v, early/late dinner and phenergan and Velerghan which both have no effect on her?.. my latest is NO light globe in the bedroom.

HELP?

[my_lot]

I have a four year old who was putting it on at bedtime. I got a white board and drew 10 circles on it. I told him when he goes to bed and stays there he can have a smiley face in the morning. He also gets one for day rest. 10 smiles = small reward. Some of his rewards have been a colouring in book, a sticker book, an action figure, a small bus.


We start the bedtime routine soon after dinner. He doesnt watch any tv and he isnt allowed to run around silly. Sometimes he will play with magnets or felt plays while i tidy up. He picks two books then we do his teeth, he goes to the toilet and has a sip of water. We read the two books on the bed, talk quietly about the books, kiss & hugs and say good night and leave the room. He has a small plug in night light. If he walks out for drink,talk, toys or anything else like that he is taken back to be and told if he walks out again he will get a sad face on his board.

This is working well for us now. I have told him i expect him to stay in his bed and what will happen if he doesnt. I let him pick his reward and we have it up high but so he can see it, so he can be reminded that if he goes to bed like a big boy he will get that reward after 10 smiley faces.

I dont think you should use any drugs to medicate your daughter to sleep if it hasnt been given by a Doctor. You should call parent line and ask for ideas but i hope other parents can give you their routines so you can see what others do.

TV may be the thing thats keeping her from sleep.

[iamLilysmummy]

thankyoou.. the medication was perscribed by the doctor :)

and shes watchd home and away since she was about 1..

the smiley face is actually a good idea. thanx i will definatly try it..

shes laying in her bed right now... NOT asleep :(

[Hollywood]

If she's not getting to sleep until 3am, what time is she sleeping until in the morning? If she's sleeping until fairly late, could it be that she just needs to be woken earlier very gradually, until she's getting up and going to bed earlier?

[Myztiks#1Fan]

Took me a very long time to get a routine for my 4yr old. I got him trained into the thought pattern that once cartoons were finished it was bed time. Works well. The only issue i have with him is staying asleep. Bedtime here is anytime between 5:30 and 6pm depending when we finish dinner as once dinner is finished he associates bed time.

Does she sleep late afternoon at all?

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[iamLilysmummy]

she wakes from 8~10am..
hasnt day slept since she was 2..

still awake.. iv sent her bak 13 times so far..

[Hollywood]

Gosh, no idea what to advise, sorry. Is she basically happy and functioning well, despite not a whole lot of sleep?

[misskittyfantastico]

What's her diet like?
You might want to do a basic elimination diet and see how she goes.

I'd wake her at 7am, she must be kindy or pre- primary?

[iamLilysmummy]

she eats all the normal foods.. shes a bouncing off the walls kinda kid. full of energy.

she goes to childcare 1~2 times a week to b social.

STILL awake .. :\

[shinebrite]

8-10 is way too late, I'd start waking her up early, like 6ish take her to the park in the mornings, bike ride in arvo, and then see if she is worn out a bit more. I'd also look at diet, she may react to sugar differently. You'd want to do this before school time starts as it would be difficult on u to get her up and ready in the mornings and then for her to stay awake, she seems like she has a lot of energy to stay up tht long, she isn't scared of the dark or something? Insomnia? Have you tried chamomile tea? You poor mum!

[shinebrite]

she eats all the normal foods.. shes a bouncing off the walls kinda kid. full of energy.


What type of 'normal' foods? If you took sugar out for a day, you may notice a decrease in energy lvls.

[iamLilysmummy]

umm. today she had
rice bubbles
chicken salad tortilla and half a paddle pop
tuna bake
pear
cruscits

she isnt scared of anything..
also wakes halfway through..

so frustrating.. not knowing why

[shinebrite]

umm. today she had
rice bubbles
chicken salad tortilla and half a paddle pop
tuna bake
pear
cruscits

she isnt scared of anything..
also wakes halfway through..

so frustrating.. not knowing why

Okaaayy everything you've stated has sugar in it. Depending on what pasta you used for the tuna bake... Hmm well if it were me, I'd start there. I know I got to a point with dd1 at 3 and she was throwing major tanties, biting, kicking, out of control. We were already Gluten/dairy and sugar free for me and hubby but I decided to take her there, and things definitely changed! Sugar and ANY preservatives, numbers, additives etc can have A LOT to do with behavioral issues especially too much energy. Have you seen a natropath?

[*Sparkles*]

Eliminating sugar sounds like a good idea and I would try a later bedtime too. My boys go to bed around 8.30pm (otherwise they wouldn't see their daddy after work) and they wake anywhere from 7.30am. If I try to put them to bed any earlier, they are just not tired yet and won't go to sleep.
Perhaps that extra hour could make a difference for her? Maybe she is just one of those people who don't need a lot of sleep.
People (such as MIL) criticise us for the later bedtimes but there is nothing in the rule book that says kids have to be in bed by 7.30pm. It's whatever works for your family and the child, IMO :)

[codswallop]

sounds just like my DD,
she was very recently diagnosed with ASD, and trouble settling is a early symptom or "flag" (apparently, we only got our diagnosis a\2 weeks ago so im still learning) my DD never self settled as a baby and only ever slept for short periods of time.
we also tried (under medical supervision) giving her medication for sleep, had sleep tests done and tried adding and removing things from her diet.
i for one am dreading next year when she starts school because any night i she falls asleep (or rather passes out) before midnight is a good night, and though she likes to sleep in in the mornings we tried getting her up at the crack of dawn too, she gets up ok, the problem is that yes then she fall asleep (passes out) around 7-8 but then wakes up at 1-2am!!!!!!
some times if we have had a few early days she may fall asleep around 6-7 and after a 30min nap you can try to wake her, but you cant! honestly when she sleeps she sleeps and when she is awake she is awake.
does your DD have any other issues? mood swings?, problems with gross motor skills? did she talk or walk early? does she like to pick up rocks or leaves and bring them home?

[iamLilysmummy]

my Dd was a early talker.. weirdly she always picks up rocks.. but iv been told she is advanced for her age.
she has lots of tantrums speshly wen were going in the car.. coz she wants to bring her bedroom with her.. she gets attactchd to her toys.

iv givin in.. im in bed with her.. its taken MAX 10 mins n she is asleep (9:05pm)

[shinebrite]

my Dd was a early talker.. weirdly she always picks up rocks.. but iv been told she is advanced for her age.
she has lots of tantrums speshly wen were going in the car.. coz she wants to bring her bedroom with her.. she gets attactchd to her toys.

iv givin in.. im in bed with her.. its taken MAX 10 mins n she is asleep (9:05pm)

Oh so she is ok while lying next to you to sleep?? Why dnt you just go with that for 'X' amount of time and ask when she is ready if she wants to start like a sticky chart of her not having mum lie nxt to her, end of the week big prize etc.. You will find big changes with taking sugar out of her diet tho, worked great guns with my DD and she actually didn't have 'problems' as such, just tantys and a fair bit 'strong willed' she likes rocks and likes to bring everything with her, would love to bring the kitchen sink...

[Lemonhead]

Thats a hard one.
Personally I wouldn't start lying with her to sleep as its a bad habit and who knows how long it would take to break- not something you want to deal with when you have a newborn. I like the reward chart idea...and definitely wake her earlier like 7am.

Lily sounds like a very clever, intelligent kid though (from what I gather from your facebook) and I know you do a lot with her so its difficult to say increase her energy expenditure kwim? Hmmm give the early waking a go.

[codswallop]

my DD is gifted too, and very high on the spectrum. What finally lead up to her diagnoses was the sleeping. Im not trying to say I think she has aspurgers like mine. Just putting out that sometimes you can do every thing you can and should do as a parent and your little one is not going to go down. Aby will often go to sleep (but not always) if I im with her, they (aspurgers) can get suffer anxiety at night

[perthmummy]

Hi,
We purchased a "groclock" for our 3 y/o as although she goes to bed and sleep at 7pm with no hassels..she is an early riser...about 5.30am to 6am. We set the "groclock" to 6.20am and at that time the clock changes from a blue screen showing a cartoon star (sleeptime) to a cartoon sun face (Daytime) Our daughter has been told that she can come out of her room and wake us up when the "sun comes on her clock" It is also used as a nightlight. May work for your daughter. Cost $80 from baby shop.

[iamLilysmummy]

thnx guys.

i dnt no about changing what she eats, she doesnt eat alot so i cook wat i know she will eat..
like today ricebubbles.. quater of a egg n a bite of bacon for lunch. nd a spoon of rice for dinner.. its hard to get her to eat somedays.

im going to start with a sticker chart :)

[codswallop]

good luck with everything. my advice is just keep doing what ever works best for you, but if it starts to get to much talk to your Gp,

[mrsd72]

I would be trying to wake her up earlier if it were me as the first thing to try - she will need to be getting up earlier than 8-10 if she starts kinder or school next year
personally I wouldn't be trying eliminating foods without trying the above first

[iamLilysmummy]

we got up at 7:30 today. c how tonight goes.