Getting your DH in tune with ED

[gardengirl]

Hi everyone

I was just wondering for those of you who are ED, or are considering it, how do you get your DH to come around to the idea too. I think most men dont really 'get it' about infertility and how terrible it is unless it has struck them personally. Am I wrong? Are there some lovely men out there who really understand?

I dont know about anyone else but my EDs DH is OK with the whole thing but really finds it a nuisance and wonders why his wife really cares. In some ways it would be easier to understand if he objected because of the genetics issues, but he doesnt really care about that aspect at all.

Its just that I think alot more women would seriously consider ED if their DH were in synch with the female way of thinking. What does everyone else think?

xx

[jo-anne.36]

:wave: hi there here here well said you are right i agree with every word you say good luck oh and nice to meet you take care jo-anne:yes:

[PMS]

Hi gardengirl.:wave: I am a first time donor to very lovely IP's. I'm not sure that my husband actually understands infertility. But as his sister had trouble conceiving and her first pregnancy ended with a blighted ovum and her third pregnancy ended in miscarriage; he is sympathetic to those who suffer through infertility. When I bought up the subject of ED he was very agreeable. We passed both our couselling sessions with flying colours and he got on with my IP's very well. So I guess I didn't have to convince him too much on the subject at all. I think it does really help if your hubby is 100% in support of you. I'm not sure that I would go ahead if he were'nt.
Do you think if your hubby read any of these threads or watched the infertility slideshow that it would help?
Well best of luck with your ED journey. Let us know how you are going.

Take care, Peta

[wa mum of 4]

I think I am very fortunate with my DH.
I am currently first time donating and my DH is the most supportive caring and loving person in relation to this.
We have never had problems with conception but I think he really understands some peoples overwhelming need to have children but are restricted due to infertility.
He worries about how this impacts on my body but is totaly supportive, I am very lucky as I have had no side effects as yet from the drugs (day 5 injections) which I think helps him.
I think its not that some men dont understand fertility they are not educated about the impact and that is why they have a problem with ED, its the problems that can arise with their much love partners/wives that worries them.
If men are informed more then I think a majority would be more open to the idea.
I am very lucky and hopefully my IP's will be in 1 week.:fingerscrossed:

[jo-anne.36]

:wave: hello wamumof4 i just want to say how wonderful and generous are you to donor your eggs your ip must think how luck they are to have some body like you i hope that it all works out for for your ip i hope i find some body like you take care jo-anne:smiliedance:

[lavender&lace]

Hi wamumof4, I can only reiterate what joanne has said. You are truly wonderful and selfless in helping your IP to become a family. I, too, hope that both joanne and I find a lovely donor like yourself.

A new baby just doesn't bring joy to the parents, but also grandparents, aunties, uncles, friends. etc. The joy spreads and that is why your gift is so precious and so appreciated.

Best wishes, Jeanette

[wa mum of 4]

Thanks jo-anne and Jeanette for your kind words.:hugs:
It funny I dont look on this as such a big deal for me personally although I know it is the biggest deal for my IP's.
I just like to help.
All women should be able to have the choice to or not to have baby's so I am just doing what I can while I can.

[jo-anne.36]

hello wamumof4 its true that all woman do have choices bit some times it just dose'nt work that way take care jo-anne

[wa mum of 4]

jo-anne I think you may of misunderstood what I was saying.:(
I ment that ED gives women a choice to concieve where otherwise there may be no hope.
I am sorry if you mistook my meaning.:)
Sarah.

[jo-anne.36]

hello iam sorry thats right i did miss under stood and you are right it dose and that is the some with icis with out that men who have low sperm or gentics thing happen could'nt father children either thats happen to us so if that was the case we would need both donor eggs and donor sperm we still mite need donor sperm in the end as my clinic do'nt know yet we need to try some eggs to see if we do iam sorry for just :ecomcity: it all out take care :hugs: jo-anne

[aqua28]

Hello wa mum of 4 and good on you:yelclap: , for not only donating your eggs, but also for being so understanding of recipients' feelings and the fact that some people simply don't have the choice (to conceive or not) that fortunately comes so naturally to most women. :banghead:

I think that generally speaking, men want to understand and want to help. You are fortunate in having such a supportive DH, and I agree that sometimes it is about educating them and allowing them into "our" world and our way of thinking and feeling. Like the others needing help from a kind and generous egg donor, like yourself, I join in to congratulate you for what you are doing and hope that someone just like you, will come into my life, soon... cheers, aqua:fingerscrossed: