Anyone dealt with this.....

[august]

......deleted for privacy , thanks for your responses.

[Hollywood]

That's very sad :( Poor kids. They're lucky to have you and your DP in their lives. Sorry I don't have anything really useful to say as I'm not in that position.

[Fuchsia!]

Poor kids :(

I would just tell them that you will be there for them and if they need their mum when she is away she will only be a phonecall away and that you can help them if they need anything.

I don't think there is anything really you can say that would make them feel any better, just make it clear that you will fill in for her while she is away.

I wouldn't say anything negative about her to them. As hard as it is it will only hurt them more and make them more upset.

I'm sure they will be fine. Sounds like they are in good hands.

[dreamtobeamummy]

those kids are very lucky to have you and their daddy in their lives..

Those poor things!

My DSS's mother has a habit of promising things to him and then 'changing her mind' and not just doing it, so he gets his hopes up and then his heart is crushed!!

I often have him say to me ' you do so much more with me then my mum' and in tears, I am the same, never know what to say!

I hope you work things out1

[delirium]

I agree, I wouldn't speak badly of their mother around them. Kids aren't silly, and while they know you aren't their biological mother, you and their father are their soft place to fall. I would just tell them their mum is needing time for herself for a while and that she still loves them. I would also tell them they can come to you whenever they need to, for a cuddle, to be angry, to just express themselves.

Honestly, she sounds selfish, and I feel for those kids. But I'm also of the belief that if a parent isn't ready to be a parent, sometimes it's better they aren't. At least they have you as a mother figure, and it sounds like you are doing a good job.

[Hollywood]

I agree, I wouldn't speak badly of their mother around them. Kids aren't silly, and while they know you aren't their biological mother, you and their father are their soft place to fall. I would just tell them their mum is needing time for herself for a while and that she still loves them. I would also tell them they can come to you whenever they need to, for a cuddle, to be angry, to just express themselves.

Honestly, she sounds selfish, and I feel for those kids. But I'm also of the belief that if a parent isn't ready to be a parent, sometimes it's better they aren't. At least they have you as a mother figure, and it sounds like you are doing a good job.

I agree. There's a saying that goes something like "Better the lie that heals than the truth that hurts". They don't need to know the real reason she won't see them so long, it would hurt them too much, better that you guys are just there for them and love them like you do.