Leaving my kids to keep them happy

[blaykendtahneemum]

the past few days have been really hard.... so many things happening with having to leave our house and my son suffering from ptsd at the age of 3.


the last couple of days i have been loosing my temper a little bit too much with my DS:banghead: ... i dont mean to get angry but with every thing else going on its hard.. i also suffer major depression , which i though i was coping with well up untill a week ago when we were made to leave our home due to violence from neighbours......

when i woke up yesterday i just wanted to get all my things and leave, without my kids..:crying: ... i told my son mummy had to go because al the troubles he is having is because of me... i feel like i have really let my ds down because all the horrible things he has experienced.... :crying:

at the moment all i can think is my kids are better off with out me because all the bad things are happening to me and they are in the middle of it all..
i just dont know what to do at the moment.. all i can think of is it may be better to leave and they will be safer and lead a happier life..:crying:

[Baby Girl]

Oh Sweetie :hugs:

I don't know what you are going through but I can't imagine that leaving your little ones in the middle of it all will be any good for any of you. Is there anyone who can look after them for a day or a night (or both) so you can have some time to yourself. Or is there anyone you can talk to about how you are feeling? A counsellor? Parent? Good friend?

I don't know what else to say I just wanted you to know there was someone 'listening' :hugs: :hugs:

[LilShenanigans]

I'd get someone to babysit, then take yourself to a doctor.

Please, realise now your NOT the terrible person you think you are, it's what depression is doing to your mind that is the terrible thing!
In your heart you know you don't want to leave, but your mind is playing tricks on you and it needs to be fixed.

I wish I could do more as words rarely help in situations like this, but when your having a clear thinking mood just get everything together and go to your doctor. If it's happening at 1am in the morning, go to the hospital ( they WILL help!), but most of all, remind yourself that you've beaten this before and you can do it again!

And I'm always around if need be :hugs:

[xkwzit]

Your kids love you, you are their MOTHER. No-one else can really fill that role in their lives. They won't remember all the cr*p, but they will know that you are not there and that will be painful for them too.

Please get yourself some help, you also may find things settle now that you are out of a stressful environment. But the fact that you care shows that your kids wellfare is uppermost in your mind and that makes you a good Mum. Your kids will not be better off without you long term, but a break could be a good idea to get yourself back.

[~EmsMum~]

your kids will always love you no matter what :) but please as others have said get someone to look after them and go and get yourself some help :hugs:

[Doula Jane]

Sweetheart.....you really need to get some help........ As MumforOne says, your depression is making things SO MUCH worse, and it's THAT that you need to tackle. Once that's under control, everything will feel easier to deal with. Is this post-natal depression that you're suffering from? - I notice you have a baby girl.....

Please know that many women have doubts about their capabilities as a parent - I know I have, many times, and I also suffered/suffer from post-natal depression and general depression, and I also sometimes felt that my DD's would be better off without me.....BUT.....when the depression is under control, you realize that your bubs need YOU.....ALWAYS. We all lose our temper from time to time with our kids and regret it afterwards. It's part of being a parent! Try to hang in there and get some professional help.

Have a look at www.depressioNet.com.au and follow the links for help in your area. There is also a chat room where you can get support and just feel like you're not alone........

Good luck with everything.....and remember that you and your gorgeous bubs need EACH OTHER.


Doula Jane :kiss:

[Chickadee]

Hey Tamara. I'm currently struggling with depression and have only been finally getting help for a few months. I completely understand the feeling of needing to run away, and thinking that your kids would be better off if you did. But they wouldn't. One of the many symptoms of people with depression is an inability to concentrate and make rational decisions, as well as a skewed sense of logic. You're not thinking straight - it's not your fault at all, but recognise that your thinking is a bit wonky.

I think you're around the corner from me. Want to go to a park with the kids this afternoon and have a chat? I have a nearly 3 year old DD who would probably love to play with your son.

[wannabemum]

Hi hunny, sending so many :hugs: to you!!!!!

Your childrens love to you is unconditional, you suffer from an illness (as many of us do), that is not your fault and it is something that can be treated! Leaving your children is something that once you feel a little better and are "thinking more clearly", you will beat yourself up about.

A fellow bubhubber, Martha, is in your area, I suggest meeting up with her and so the kids can play and you guys can chat, honestly I believe it will help you!

please continue to talk to us all :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[angcaltam]

I'd get someone to babysit, then take yourself to a doctor.

Please, realise now your NOT the terrible person you think you are, it's what depression is doing to your mind that is the terrible thing!
In your heart you know you don't want to leave, but your mind is playing tricks on you and it needs to be fixed.

I wish I could do more as words rarely help in situations like this, but when your having a clear thinking mood just get everything together and go to your doctor. If it's happening at 1am in the morning, go to the hospital ( they WILL help!), but most of all, remind yourself that you've beaten this before and you can do it again!

And I'm always around if need be :hugs:

I just wanted to second this. There is help out there, please go and see your Dr. Your kids need their Mum and with help you can be there for them the way they need.:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[Mum&bubs]

Oh honey Im so sorry to hear you've been having a rough time at the moment :hugs: But we are all here listening & will be here for you. The others have pretty summed up what I was thinking, I think it would be best if you went and got some help. That would be the best thing you could do for your children, they wouldnt want you to leave nor would they be better off without you. But if you seek help things would be better for all of you. I hope you work things out & I really really hope you go to your doctor and get the help you deserve :kiss: