View Full Version : How do you deal with an absent parent?
Seems like a difficult situation you're in, he is trying to get ahead at work which is great for the future but bad for now!
My husband works in the mines but he always has so kids used to it. Also he is on a set roster so we know what to expect. I would hate for him to be coming and going like that!!
It's hard when the money isn't there as a reward for the sacrifice, same with us so I hear where you're coming from! Although we work in the same business so although him being away does mean 2x the work for me (covering him) it doesn't mess with my own career. That must be hard - is that something that you discussed prior and you agreed to, or it has just worked out that way? It would be hard not to feel resentful if you don't feel you agreed to that. Sounds like you need to talk about it and agree on where you're going, and how long you're prepared to sacrifice for...?
As for making it up to the kids... it's tricky hey. Mine are ok for up to about 10 days, then they really start to miss him and it just gets horrible :( We're now just over 2 weeks into a month+abit trip and my special needs 5 year old is really pining. Tis hard.
Hope your hubby gets the promotion or advancements he's after really soon and it all pays off! :hugs:
I am sorry to hear that you are struggling... It doesn't help when you aren't being rewarded for the sacrifices that your family is making.
I don't know how I cope tbh. My DH is now on a set roster but for a while we weren't seeing him very often at all. At one stage we saw him 3 times in 6 months. On his days off he would stay in a caravan park because flying home just wasn't viable and we couldn't afford it. During this time I kept thinking in terms of weeks... It will be over soon... It will be over soon. My ds wouldn't talk to him on the phone because he missed him and the anger was overwhelming. We all went into survival mode and knowing that there was a brighter future ahead of us was what pulled us through. We started dreaming and making lists of all of the things that we wanted to do once we were back together. I suppose this made us feel like we were putting some plans into action and that there was a reason for all of this heartache.
These days I am just greatful that I have my husband back. We are still making plans for our future but we have started crossing some things off the list which feels amazing!
I hope that your sacrifices pay off in the long run. I am sure your dh doesn't want to be away either and he is just doing his best to try and provide a brighter future for the people he loves.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.1.9 Copyright © 2013 vBulletin Solutions, Inc. All rights reserved.