View Full Version : Lots of kids????
StormAngel
19-09-2005, 09:52
Hi
I thought i'd start this thread, so that maybe we could share tips on raising larger families (although anyone is welcome)
I'm Jo, 30, married and have 4 wonderful kids, DS - 12, DD - 10, DD - 7 & DD - 13mths.
We are also currently TTC #5
Mumof3Princesses
19-09-2005, 10:44
Hi Jo,
Good for you!! I think large families are just wonderful! :D
We are in the process of ttc #4 and would consider more after that too! Some people think we are strange for wanting more than two kids. :eek: I say the more the merrier!!! I look forward to the day when we all gather together and I have lots of grandkids to fuss over!!
Good luck with #5 - hope bub joins your lovely family soon! :)
StormAngel
19-09-2005, 10:55
I agree, the more the merrier, although i admit it does get loud and hectic here at times! LOL, but then i wouldn't want it any onther way!!!!!
maybe1more
19-09-2005, 13:02
Hey Jo, I would so much love to have a big family, i only have to one at the moment and i cant wait for 6 months to fly to i can start trying again, we are only on one income but i think money cant be compare to the love a child brings! I hope next time i have twins!! Then i can tell my parnter thats its cruel to have an uneven number! Im not saying that it is but if thats what i have to do to get my 4 kids then i will! :D
StormAngel
19-09-2005, 16:46
Firstbub - LOL!
We only have one income, but we seem to manage!
philippa.s
19-09-2005, 20:53
;) I need some help convincing DH that a big fmily is good. Can you help me right a list of pro's.
Cheers
StormAngel
20-09-2005, 14:37
I'll be away for the next 10 days, but i'll have a think and write you a list when i get back!
I'm with Mumof3Princesses......I want to grow old surrounded by a large extended family. So I want lots of kids and lots of grandkids!! I'd also put a hand up for lots of nieces and nephews but unfortunately my brother in law and two brothers are not overly interested! Bah...!
I want the traditional stuff - big family christmas with the whoooole extended family joining together for the holidays, big picnics during the holidays, playing cricket at the beach etc etc!
Not to mention I think it would be sad to end up in a retirement home one day with no one to come visit or call.
Friends are great, but theres no substitute for the love of a great family :D
I have 3 but would dearly love more. I just love being a mother and as I was an only child, there was no way I was having just 1 child. If I wasn't 38, had 3 cs and didn't get debilitating sickness during pregnancy I think I would go for it again.
I love the noise and chaos. I also love a little gang of kids playing together. Could live without the mess however :rolleyes:
Michele Crocker
22-09-2005, 17:43
Hi,
I am a mother of four with number 5 due in November. I have three boys and a girl. Number 5 will be my second girl. I love having kids. My kids ages range from 12 to 3 at the moment.
Michele
Mother of Christopher, Luke, Melissa, Jayden and baby girl due in November :)
our little treasures
23-09-2005, 00:53
I have 2 and would love another 2-4.
Have to see how we go!!
I have four. DD turns 6 in October, DS turns 4 in October, DD turned 2 in August and DD was born 4 weeks ago.
My house is noisy and scattered with toys, I am sooooo tired, but I wouldn't have it any other way. It is really hard now with them all so young, but I always wanted 4 kids and we know how lucky we are. Life will never be boring! :)
Kim
I only have 2 at the moment, although you could say that I have four as there are 2 waiting for me when I depart this earth (in many, many years time!).
I would love to have at least 4 and it is now a case of trying to convince my husband that he isn't going to lose me if I have another! My last baby died at 11weeks gest because I had bi-lateral pneumonia and nearly died ... he is so scared that this is going to happen again.
I don't know what the big deal is when people see that you have more than 2 kids! They seem to think that having so many kids is more of a handful ... I tend to disagree! They are more likely to entertain themselves, help each other with the little things so that you are not called on so often, make a lot of noise (which I love!) and are all around happier!
I am a sucker for punishment and often tell my friends to leave thier kids with me while they go shopping ... sometimes I have up to 11 kids here and it is an amazing experience! I know having them on loan is not like having your own, but I love to hear the silly conversations, the little niggles over toys, the way they take care of each other and listening to them learning new things together.
Talking to my dh last night, I think that he is pretty set on stopping at 2 ... I guess I will just have to keep borrowing kids!
Mumoffour
27-09-2005, 12:13
I have three boys now and we are expecting number four some time soon :rolleyes: (shes overdue). I have always wanted four kids and am blessed that we are able to fulfill that dream. I was one of four but there was four years in between us each so we never got along. I now have a 10 year old, a nine year old, a two year old and hopefully soon- a newborn. Some of the comments though from complete strangers have blown me away- we were out for dinner one night and the owner of the restaurant came over and started chatting to us. When she found out i was carrying #4 she turned to my hubby and said "dont you know how to keep it put away?"!! :mad: I dont think we will be dining there again! My hubby is one of 8 and his brother and his wife are now expecting number 7. this one is definalty the last but i wouldnt have it any other way. :)
Angel_baby_1982
28-09-2005, 00:35
I want at least 6, DH wants 4 but he said we won't rule out more! He loves kids so I may be lucky!
I am so sick of people saying more than 2 or 3 is wrong/crazy/too expensive. I just recieved a post on another forum from a woman who said unless your monthly income is more than $10,000 you shouldn't consider more than 2 kids and if you do you're cruel because there's no way you can give all your kids the best of everything! :mad:
She also said a gap of less than 6 years is cruel because with more than 1 child under 6 you can't give both of them the attention they need! :mad:
I plan on being a teacher and have no trouble giving a load of kids my attention all at once!
One of my best friends is 23 and one of a dozen kids!!!! She has 6 sisters aged 10, 15, 17, 20, 24 and 29 and 5 brothers aged 12, 14, 17 (yep her mum had twins) 25, and 27! Her parents have a dairy farm, they aren't rich but they are the largest and happiest family I know. I'd love a family like that.
Mumoffour
30-09-2005, 17:09
Yikes! 10,000 a month!! i wish! :rolleyes: The thing is if you cant give your kids 'the best of everything'doesnt it mean that they will truly appreciate the things they do have and realise the value of things? My kids dont have the best of everything but they certainly dont miss out . So what if their gameboy is secondhand off ebay and they dont get tuckshop at school every week?
I would also be worried about having a 6 year gap between kids- everyone has to learn to share and not always be centre of attention. My kids know how to wait and how to share and how to look after each other when im busy. i think being in a bigger family encourages kids to learn how to be considerate of others.
My kids give me a headache now and then and a heartache now and then but they also fill my days with love and pride and i wouldnt trade them in for all the big incomes and flash homes in the world. :D
Crazyfamily
30-09-2005, 17:45
I guess having #6 on the way makes us a big family. I to get comments about money, time etc but all my children are loved and cared for and happy. The young ones wear clothes from k mart target and big w as they don't care at all. My teenagers wear clothes from "normal" shops to but also have a couple of the more popular brands for when they go out with friends or somewhere special. It is very noisy at my house and unfortunatly the house is in no way perfect. clean the kitchen bathroom and toilet everyday and sweep many times a day. I have even been known to make a bed quickly before getting into it. The only people who care about this are people who don't matter to me. We are one big happy family and wouldn't have it any other way. My kids fight with each other but all kids do. My young ones are all close in age. They needed to be as I am not all that young. I can't wait to have this one just to add a little more chaos to our lives.
I too would like to have 4 kids (that's a big family these days :) ). We have 3 at the moment & we even get the how do you afford it/ you've got a tribe comments. I have 3 girls & my eldest has just turned 3 ! But like all of you i wouldn't change it for the world. Your right about the money issue so what if they don't have the "best" of everything as long as we're all happy who cares. I think its great that some of us want or have more than 2 kids it really fufills my life & im sure yours too. I have know people who only want 2 because they want a SS Commodore ( & that's fine if they want that) but i hate it when we get called "the Tribe" we only have 3 (at the moment ;) ) & you should hear the comments when i say i would love another :mad: . Oh well you can't please everyone!
Me :24
DH :29
DD : 3
DD : 21mth
DD : 6mth
mummycloud
06-10-2005, 18:03
I have 4. My mother was dark on me for not getting an abortion with my youngest :mad: I WANTED him! What sort of person tells a married adult to get an abortion when they got pregnant on purpose? It's not like I'm a single teenager, even then she should support me in whatever choice I make and not be angry at me for not choosing what SHE wants me to do.
She LOVES him now that he is here, maybe I should remind her of how she behaved when I was in my first trimester.
DH is as happy as a pig in mud. He always said no to more than 3 but when I was pregnant with my 4th he was so impatient..LOL he knew his first son was cooking in there and couldn't wait to have him in his arms :)
I want more, but DH keeps saying some crap about "our" time :rolleyes: I want "MY" time surrounded by my kids. DH will end up sleeping his way through our "golden years" anyways..LOL
He wants to be able to start saving money one day and maybe travelling. I'd love to take all the kids travelling with us, so I guess it would be more realistic financialy if we just have the 4 to take with us.
The sadest thing is that when my youngest starts prep, my oldest will be 20 :eek: so I'll really, be back to only having 3 "kids" I'm sure by the time she's 20 she'll have left home.
bekababe3
07-10-2005, 12:09
I have three, and would love to have another one or two. Not for a little while though... i'm 25 and in no rush... and things are crazy enough in my house as it is. :)
Angel_baby_1982
07-10-2005, 14:52
LOL DH told me last night he secretly wants us to have multiples :D
But only after we have had #3, so then we'll have 5, and then we will have an excuse to have another because we agreed on having an even number of kids :D
He always said he wanted 3-4 before we had our son and now he wants as many as we can physically have :D He's an awesome daddy. :)
StormAngel
09-10-2005, 14:02
Hi
Isn't it amazing how many of us there are with/or wanting lots of kids!
We have 6! Admittedly, two are our own and 4 inherited, but all ours now. DS 12, DD 10, DS 8, DD 6, DS 4 and DD 2! We just need Alice and we'd be complete. Meal times are interesting, holidays fun and bath time a mess. I don't remember life any other way now. Would've loved one or two more of my own, but we'd need a mini bus...
I want a large family too but DH doesn't want more so we are "negotiating".
But thought I would point out that there was a birth notice in the paper yesterday for a family welcoming their 13th child! And another welcoming the 7th! I won't be complaining about the work that 2 create for a while!
sopolicha
10-10-2005, 07:19
I saw the one with the 13th child also and I had to count all the names twice to make sure!!! I think it is a nice idea but three is my limit - unless we come into multi millions.
donnellyfamily
10-10-2005, 14:25
Hi ladies,
I just found this board and wanted to come and introduce myself, I am Fiona 30y/o mum, married to Jake for 12years, we have 7 kiddo's and are currently in the 2WW for no.8 :D
mollyandkurtsmum
10-10-2005, 19:16
what is 2ww ???????? sorry just interested :D
Angel_baby_1982
10-10-2005, 20:24
the 14 days (two weeks) you have to wait to test after ovulation.
we have been so blessed with boy, girl, boy, girl and whilst it can be hard work we are very happy :) we may not have the 'best' of everything (but who defines what is best anyway? if an absent mother/father with tons of money is the best then we dont want it!) my kids have everything they need and more, lots of love, nice clean clothes, lots of toys and yummy home cooked meals. My dh and i both work hard and are not on benefits, so why should it be anyone elses business how we spend our money? everyones priorities are different, some people want to spend their money on flashy cars, hols etc and thats fine with me (dh and i have plenty of time for that later if we wish), but id rather invest mine in the future~my kids!
We had a bit of a break-through the other night ... my dh has told me that if the pay increase with his new position (still in the planning stages) is substantial and if I lose some weight and get healthy, we can have as many kids as our hearts desire as long as we feel that we are able to handle it! He then admitted that this decision is fuelled by the fact that he just has to look at a baby and he gets incredibly clucky!
Yay! Maybe I can have a big family after all!
oh just realised i forgot to welcome Fiona :) look forward to getting to know you better, as well as maybe getting some organisational tips off you!
Crazyfamily
12-10-2005, 12:25
Hi everyone,
I just had to have a whinge. Usually I love being a mum of a big family but today is so hard. I took my three little ones shopping (aged 4, 2, and 1). I am also 18 weeks pregnant and feeling 38 weeks. My kids ran around driving me and everyone else crazy and we came home. Why are they good at home and turn into wild beasts as soon as they see shops. I am exhausted.
Sorry guys just had to let that out.
Caroline, every one has those days. Days when just for a split second you feel like running away, when you have a little fantasy about your former life, but then, as you know, the kids do something really wonderful and that pulls you back to earth!
StormAngel
13-10-2005, 13:32
Hi all
Caroline, i can soooo relate, sometimes they can be the biggest horrors in the world :eek:
feel free to vent anytime, i'm sure we all have our not so good days!
donnellyfamily
13-10-2005, 14:39
thats for sure I think we all have days where we wish we'd never gotten out of bed, but generally the good outweighs the bad.
Oh and thanks for the welcome coopsntilly :)
Michele Crocker
17-10-2005, 12:11
Hi,
I love having a big family, It is very rare we all go shopping together as I usually go when the oldest kids are at school. When we are together, we do get comments and I just ignore them. Luckily most of the time my kids behave but there is times when one misbehaves and I have to take them home.
I am actually due to give birth to my fifth baby in three weeks time and I can't wait. This is one is a girl and my little girl is excited because she has three brothers and she really wanted to have a sister to play with.
Michele
Mother of Christopher, Luke, Melissa, Jayden and baby girl due on the 8th November
jarrahsmumma
18-10-2005, 16:30
its great to see some other like minded people about :)
i am 21 and have one baby boy ...so far and my partner and i are planning another 4
i grew up with three sisters and loved it
like most of u i dont think money is a main issue
yay for big families
peace
Hi i'm Vikki, and i'm a mum of 4 and 1 stepson!! My kids are 12, 9,8, 20mths and 8wks. Jade's my last, i had my tubes cut after my third c-section. Anyway i love being a mum, you have to if your going to have more than one...My 12yr old is great with my two littlie ones. She's a good helper!!! My 9yr old has some special needs, so im busy, busy all the time!! But thats the way i like it... I love beening home when my kids get home from school. My 20mht old loves it too. His eyes light up when his big brother and sister walk through the door. At times it can be hard, and we don't get to see our 8yr old much as he lives in vic,and we live in QLD..... But its all worth it in the end. I better go as my 8wk old is crying for me...Looking forward to chatting to you all. :)
StormAngel
20-10-2005, 13:26
Hi Vicki,
Welcome, my little one (14mths) just loves it when her big brother and sisters come home from school too.
Michele Crocker
20-10-2005, 18:11
Hi,
Welcome VIkki,
I have four kids and a fifth due in the next three weeks. I have three boys and a girl. My oldest is a special needs child, as he is mildly intellectually disable, has low muscle tone and is on medication for epilepsy. My 9 year old helps me a lot but I am now trying to get the younger ones to get in and help me as well.
Michele
Mother of Christopher, Luke, Melissa, Jayden and baby girl due on the 8th November
Angel_baby_1982
21-10-2005, 12:10
My 'friend of a dozen siblings' said her mum used to get asked when they went to mc donalds or a theme park or the movies "so what school are you guys with"
Just found this site and love it!
I have four and would love a 100! if only my husband would agree.
i want to buy a new emmaljunga twin could anyone know of a shop where they live that would have one? I really want the Minior classis model.
I live in far country QLD with 2 autistic kids too so I need this so desperately!
Thanks for any help
Trenna
Thanks for the reply. I will have a look on teh net at the mountain buggy. did you get a single or a twin?
I thought emmal as I had already bought a valco 3 wheeler and i was so unhappy with it i was just put off 3 wheelers.
The emma people (unofficially) reckon it would hold adults weight?!
Ms. Casper,
We have a tarago van, but my husband wants to get a mercedes van (apparently very good) i am thinking more mini bus style but you need a different car liscence for that!
I hate the implication of "are they all the same father?" too, what makes it any of their business anyway? and so what if they weren't? what are they actually trying to say?
Michele Crocker
21-10-2005, 20:53
Hi,
I have a three wheel stroller we bought when Jayden was born and Melissa was a toddler. I found it was tough in steering it, the front wheel had a mind of its own just like a shopping trolley. Anyway just got it out for when my baby puts in an appearance in a few weeks and found out that it has a puncture in it. Rang Baby Co. where we bought the pram from and find out that pram is no longer in circulation and we would have to go a bike shop and have the problem fixed up.
The pram was not cheap so I am not happy that I could not get a new wheel for it.
Regarding comments about family size. I get it all the time as well, after a while you get used to comments like don't you have a TV, or you sure are busy. I say yes and I like to keep busy.
Michele
Mother of Christopher, Luke,
Hi all, We drive a chrysler grand voyager, it has seven seats which is enough for us. I love it, it drives really well has all the mod cons and a large boot!! That was a big seller for us, the targos and so on don't have much boot space. I just bought a Jeep wagoneer tanbem which is really good, every body has a tray with cup holders (even me), it has lots of pockets a large basket which has a zip down the middle for easy acess. And my 20 mth old loves playing with the steering wheel on the front, and it fits into my boot!!!
My 1st two are from my 1st husband, and when people ask if there from the same father we say yes. Its not any of their bussness and my husband loves all his children as do i.
I thought all you guys with loads of kids may help.
I am looking for a new emmaljunga twin Minior classic pram.
Has anyone seem one in shops near them? as they are not listed as this years model shops on-line only seem to want to sell me their latest model. I live in country QLD and have no shops.
Thanks very much
Angel_baby_1982
25-10-2005, 14:59
keep an eye out on e-bay!
Sorry, other than that I'm not much help!
Angel_baby_1982
31-10-2005, 12:43
My MIL tels us we shold stop at one, heaps of other people say we should just have one more, my parents don't care how many we have. they aren't really interested either way, my grandparents tell me to have as many as I want "as long as there's 3 yrs between them all" I'm lucky in that DH and I agree on the number of kids we want, we're on the same page in that respect, always have been.
Michele Crocker
31-10-2005, 12:52
Hi,
Mrs Casper, I agree totally with you. I am due to have my fifth shortly and I keep getting " thats enough, you are not having any more" . I was thinking to myself that this one would probably be my last but because I am getting all these comments, I am rethinking that decision and I might just have another one down the track.
Michele
Mother of Christopher, Luke, Melissa, Jayden and baby girl due this week.
StormAngel
01-11-2005, 10:14
Hi all
We are TTC #5 at the moment and i have not breathed a word to my mother or MIL, the carry on would be unbeleivable, and i think the stress of them telling me "no more" would take it's toll on the TTC front (does that meake sense)
I totally agree with the previous messages! It is none of anyones business how many kids you have. It does amaze me though on the comments i get of how this last one (only no. 4) would have been somehow a mistake. Now no. 4 is already here it makes me so angry that so many people think that you are not capable of looking after or spending enough time with each child as it is. That they will be deprived of love or attention. My husband and i spend all our time with our kids even though we don't get time to go out drinking or to the pub or "free alone time" that all these people talk about think we need. We actually don't want to go out or away we really love spending time with our kids instead.
I think go ahead and have as many as you want and ENJOY them, life is over quick enough as it is and don't have any regrets. If i wasn't so old (36!) i reckon i would have had a hundred! Where i live in Mackay there are loads of women who are my age who actually have 12 and 13 kids each. They look after them fine, home school them and they always have toys and clean clothes on. True story, but then again they do have a lot of family help and support!
mumof4boys
09-11-2005, 22:25
You are right family support is important BUT its not the be all and end all of raising well mannered, clean clothed, polite little people. :p
My hub and I started out as young parents, we had our eldest son when I was 19 and Ben was 18, we were left to do it alone and we have ever since.
We don't get nights off or days, for that matter, we are always buggeting, which isn't so bad and hand me downs are not nessarily a dirty word.
We love our kids and if we could afford it I might consider having 1 more but its just not fair to the 4 we have, the bubble can only be so big..
We are now 27 and 26 respectivly and considered quite young, but I look at it this way when our boys move out of home I can put my feet up and enjoy my hubs mid life crisis and he can enjoy the best sex of his life, well until menopause kicks in. :D
Angel_baby_1982
09-11-2005, 23:31
LOL!
We want our first 3-4 kids before we're 30 so they will all be 'grown up' before we're too old as well!
Michele Crocker
19-11-2005, 18:19
Hi,
I have just recently had my fifth child, and everyone including nurses from the hospital, were asking me if I have completed my family and I just said I don't Know and they said, You can't be considering any more and I said nothing. So what I am considering no. 6 down the track, it is none of their business, I don't go saying how to run their lives.
Like I said before, I was thinking this one was going to be it, but now I am thinking what the hell, I think I just have one more just to shut these people up.
Michele
Mother of Christopher, Luke, Melissa, Jayden and Ashleigh(just over two weeks old)
StormAngel
20-11-2005, 13:31
Good for you Michele :D I agree it's your decicion nobody elses so they should keep there comments to themselves!
oh and Congrats on you bub!!!!!
Mamaduke
20-11-2005, 15:24
Hi,
I only have two (for the moment!) but there is a lady on the Essential Baby forum who has 12!! She has a beautiful picture of the kids as her sig. and they are all smiling together - I can't manage to do this and I only have two!
I hope she doesn't mind, but I've included a quote here from one of her posts of what a day in the life of a large family involves (I'm not trying to put anyone off!)
I'll choose a Thursday!
woken at 5ish to feed Gabriel then sneak out of bed at 6 so as to not disturb the 2 or 3 sleeping children in our bed! a load of washing on. into the shower(if I'm lucky), lunches for 4 high schoolers, 4 primary schoolers 1 4yo kinder snack 1 3yo kinder snack, dh's lunch, fruit for playgroup(if theres any left) and a bottle of milk for Beth(really wish I'd done it last night!). Kids start appearing for breaky, make a pot of porridge and the rest have cereal and toast.
Kids up. Nathan 14 jumps into shower, Mary 13 begs to go next(she's supposed to have hers at night) then Josh 16. Dh jumps into our shower, by the times he's out we begin trying to get Ben 17 up, that usually takes a few goes!! Meanwhile I am organising younger ones into clothes, all school aged kids get their own and then help me with the preschoolers. socks and shoes are always a major last minute hassle!!! Josh Nathan and Mary walk to bus, I start yelling "In the Car" of course that only gets them out the door so I continue from the drivers seat. Realise Ben has missed the bus again so have to wait while he jumps in the car. Drive to primary school(late) then 4yo kinder(also late)then high school(even later). Drive to 9.15 mass(I try to go to daily mass when I can) have a few moments of peace, well sort of with 3 kids with me- Beth has her bottle to keep her quiet and I usually b/feed Gabriel. then to playgroup which is at the same place as Mass. Stay there till 12.00 drive to pick up Zeke from kinder have 1/2 an hour between that and Isaiah at 3yo so go buy petrol or something, drop off Isaiah at 3yo then home to relative peace. Make a quick sandwich then Beth goes to bed, feed Gabe again and he has a sleep, Ezekiel usually plays a computer game or watches a dvd while I hang, dry, fold etc and tidy kitchen, think about dinner and just catch up(well try to) on other housework. 3.15 is time to pick up Isaiah from Kinder and get the primary kids, so I wake up the 2 that are ususally still asleep and head off there. Pop into the supermarket to get whatever I need for dinner and bread and milk for the next day. Nathan and Mary arrive home on school bus, Josh has deb practice till 5.30 dh brings him home and Ben heads into the city for a youth Holy hour at St Pat's(they go out for dinner afterwards).At Home, cook dinner, bath kids do more washing. Josh starts work at 6.50 and Nathan has b'ball training 7-8pm. Back home again help dh finish putting kids to bed then one of us goes out to pick up Nathan. Do more washing etc. think about making lunches for tomorrow then decide I'm too tired, clear up kitchen put on dishwasher. Pick up Ben from station and home to bed! Gabe ususally feeds once or twice overnight.
Somewhere in there I check eb and email, we have 7 basketball games every week plus training but thankfully that is it atm for sport. Plus we have youth grp every sunday night(I help run it the older 4 go) I'm on the ed board for school and the baptism committee at church.
I think she is an absolutely remarkable woman...three cheers, hip hip...
Carly
Hey all, hope you dont mind me jumping on in!
I have 6 little rug rats, 5 boys, then my bubby girl!
they start at 13, and the youngest is 20months. and I have twin 4 year olds in there too
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