Need to Vent !!!!!!!!!

[Ange&Seth]

DP started a new job about 3 weeks ago. It sounded great!! Car, Phone and Fuel card, more money, more 'family time' and a few overnight stays. Yeah right. Like I said, he started there 3 weeks ago and he's barely been home for the past 2 weeks. Last Tuesday, he started work at 4am, didn't get home til late Wednesday night, then left again at 4am Friday morning, didn't get home til after 7pm Monday night, left again 4am Tuesday morning, got home about 3pm yesterday afternoon, then took off to 'pick up some work gear' just before 5pm and didn't get home til 7pm and then he told me he'd 'stopped in to see his best mate'. He started again at 4am this morning and he won't be home til around 7pm tonight, which is when I have to start work so we've had to get his best mate to come round tonight in case DPs not home when I leave for work!!!! I don't think what we have at the moment can be called a 'relationship'.

How do you guys deal with this sort of thing? Does it get easier? I just feel really down about the whole thing

[MrsMiggins]

Oh Ange! I'm sorry! :hugs: I know how much you were looking forward to this new opportunity!

I guess all I can say is that for us, it doesn't exactly get easier, but you have your good days & your bad days. You do find new ways to cope with everyday things, but that isn't to say that I don't still feel anger & frustration at times. There isn't a day that goes by where I don't wish DH didn't just have a normal 9-5, Mon-Fri job like most dads!!

As always, feel free to chat/vent any time! :hugs:

[angcaltam]

No advice for you sorry Ange, just wanted to say that I'm here if you ever need to talk. We still have to have our Wagga Wagga bubhub meet up when you get time.

Try and keep your chin up and always remember to tell him how you are feeling.

Lots of :hugs: & :kiss: coming your way.

[hayleylea]

Ange I cant really give you any advice because DF doest work away but he does work ALOT! You know im always around though if you need to chat!

Maybe things will settle down once he has been in this job a bit longer!

:hugs: Sorry i couldnt help you much but theres probably a few people out there in your situation that might be able to provide you with more support!????????

[MilkOnTap]

Wow - that is crazy hours... Thats unreal... I thought my hubby's job was bad - being away for 6 months... But at least he never actually came home and I had a date that I KNEW he would be home... With you its so inconsistent that you just dont know WHAT to expect...

Maybe he should sit down with his boss (when he gets a chance...) and find out WHY things are so hectic?

[Ange&Seth]

Apparently it's like this at this time every year. I'm just so annoyed. I work on the weekends at a Hotel as receptionist/waitress and occassionally I'll do a few evening shifts in the restaurant. I took this job so that I could work when DP would be home with DS. So far, I've had to send DS an hour and a half away to my parents house for the ENTIRE weekend cos I had no one here who could watch him, so not only was DP away from Friday to Monday, I didn't even have DS with me Friday to Sunday!!! I had to work last night, and DP couldn't guarantee that he'd be home before I left for work so I had to line up his best mate to be here so I could go to work. I just got a call to work tonight as well and AGAIN DP can't guarantee what time he'll be home but he THINKS he'll be home by 6ish. I have to start at 6.30pm!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And again, DPs working ALL weekend, so am I, so I have had to ask my gf to come and watch DS tomorrow (I start work at 6.30am on the weekends!!!!) and then on Sunday she can't watch him so he'll have to go to my parents place again for the night.

Before DP accepted this job we sat down with his new boss and discussed that I work evenings and weekends and he said that we would have plenty of notice if DP had to go away overnight or work a weekend. He also accepted this job on the proviso that he would be home if I had to work, and here we are, he hasn't been home AT ANY TIME that I've had to work since he started the damn job!!

I'm just so frustrated. Family should come first in my eyes.

[Baby Girl]

:hugs:

I know how you feel.

Maybe your DP needs to let his boss know that the promises made are not being kept. Does he tell this boss the hours you need to work each week or is he just doing what the boss wants because it is a new job. If you guys have spoken to his employer before he started, it can't hurt for your DP to be just a little demanding and tell his boss he needs to be home by a certain time on the days you need to work.

[bearsmummy]

Oh sweet i wish i knew how to help :hugs:

Sometimes we have good times and bad, we just have to take it as it comes. Doesnt make it feel better though im afraid....
Maybe its worth sitting down with his boss again and highlighting the agreement he made to you and your family when your hubby took the job.
:fingerscrossed: it is just this time of the year and things start to settle down for you soon.

We are all here whenever you need us! :hugs:

[lavenderpegasus]

I'm just here to offer support my dh is away for blocks at a time so I can work out where my life is and where his is. it is very organised on my side anyway.

Good Luck, I hope things settle down again for you