Night Shift Widows

[BlissedOut]

Surely there must be some other BH members who are 'Night Shift Widows'.

DH often works 4.30pm-10am.

What are the downsides for you? Do you do things differently on work days?

I find I stay up a bit later, watch a lot of movies... DH sleeps at work overnight, so he doesn't need to come home and sleep, which I'm grateful for.

[peanutbutter&jelly]

DF works 4 nights a week, 4.30pm till whenever they get the job done. About the latest he's been home is 3am?
Its quite nice most of the time, with a newborn it was harder, worse with a reflux baby first time, then with a non-sleeping almost 2 year old and a newborn (who thankfully slept reasonably). Now, with 2 toddlers (2 months off turning 3 and 13 months) its pretty good. I sloth a lot. I clean the house at night. I sleep peacefully, without someone trying to cuddle me in the heat (I hate sleep cuddlers :laughing: :laughing:)

[giveitago]

I kind of am. DP starts work at 2 am so he's asleep by 7.30 - 8.00pm. So after I get home at 5pm, we eat dinner and then he's asleep. So it feels kind of the same!!!!

Very ALONE

[naebie]

DP works hospitality hours- So he starts at 11am and finishes at 11pm with an hour or so break at 3 pm. His body clock is all outta whack, so he sleeps from 1-2am until 9 am then leaves at 10:30 for work so I don't really see him much... I usually crash out as soon as he gets home from work, because my day starts when DD rises at 6ish.
Basically, most of the time I feel like a single mum, except with the benefits of having someone to talk over problems with etc. and the disadvantage of double the washing and housework etc.

[krystallxx]

My dp does work in the day .. Starts at 4-5am and generally won't get home till 6 at the earliest. He has a very physical job as well as mentally draining so is in bed pretty much straight after dinner. It is lonely and hard work, especially on the testing days. I wish his job wasn't so full on sometimes but it brings good money so we just have to cope.

[Beck13]

Yep I'm another night shift widow! Actually Dh has just gone back onto afternoon shift (2pm - 10.30pm), which is heaps better than 8.30pm-6am. But in some aspects its harder. Dinner/bed time is a killer to do alone with a 7mth old and an almost 4yr old, who likes to stall bedtime at the best of times! But in the long run we get to see more of Dh, get a full weekend with him now and he is happier and healthier. Must say though I did like having the bed to myself all night when he was on the night shift, although once he gets home and has dinner and winds down he's not coming to bed until about 2am anyway. Another bonus of this shift is he does the night feed for me so I'm getting a full nights sleep:smiliedance:

[BlissedOut]

DF works 4 nights a week, 4.30pm till whenever they get the job done. About the latest he's been home is 3am?
Its quite nice most of the time, with a newborn it was harder, worse with a reflux baby first time, then with a non-sleeping almost 2 year old and a newborn (who thankfully slept reasonably). Now, with 2 toddlers (2 months off turning 3 and 13 months) its pretty good. I sloth a lot. I clean the house at night. I sleep peacefully, without someone trying to cuddle me in the heat (I hate sleep cuddlers :laughing: :laughing:)

Ugh, that's what I'm not looking forward to. Soren's quite a good baby, doesn't sleep through, but goes back to sleep with a bottle. He'll be 13 months when his sister arrives.

I definitely love the no sleep cuddles, Soren sleeps in my bed with me when his dad is working, I have bad SPD and getting out of bed to just give him a bottle is murder on my body. But Soren is a baby and my bed is king sized... plus, I love him that little bit more. Haha.

With DHs last job he had a 3am start, so I didn't get night help with Soren then either as DH needed his sleep more than I did, I found that doable, so hopefully having two wont be too bad. Soren didn't have any major night issues though. I could be in for a little horror! :eek:

I must say, doing it by myself all these nights makes DH feel bad for me, so he does the nights he's home for (and doesn't have a morning shift) and I get SLEEP INS! :eek: :p

While it is lonely as you guys have said, it's kind of nice having the solitude during such a blank part of the day and having DH to do family stuff with me during the day.

[TinyLittleTootsies]

Dh just left for his nightshift. He is on holidays but picking up a few extra shifts here and there.

I get scared! lol... I don't fall asleep until I can't actually keep my eyes open, because if I try to sleep before I am exhausted I just hear every little noise and stay awake wondering if someone is going to break in... so odd. I never used to get scared before having kids. I think I have to protect them haha.

So that makes me tired, because the next day he sleeps all day and I have been awake the first half of the night scared and then my girls usually wake up one after the other a few times between 3am and when they get up at 7am. night shift here is a killer!!! lol

[Daydream Believer]

I kind of am... Hubbys hours are all over the place. Last two days was 5am-1pm, 6am-3pm, today and tomorrow are 3.30pm-1.30am.
And it changes with 24hours notice!
I have become a little more accustomed to it now that he's been doing it for 2months
As I've discussed with beck13 in a vent thread I started when he had only just begun, one of the worst things about it is feeling like I need to keep the kids quiet. I reckon i would feel way less stressed about it if there wasn't that factor. I kind of feel like I'm in a pressure cooker.
Hubby has told me not to worry. He's also said sometimes my shushing is more distracting than the crying :p

But the bonus for us is that we have a lot of 3 day breaks, some 4 day breaks and even a 5 day break here an there, plus the pay. So u take the good with the bad.

In the morning I'm taking the kids to the gym, they'll go into the child minding and hubby will sleep til about 10.30, and then we have a bit of day together... So it's ok, I guess.

I SO agree beck13, about bed/dinner time! And my dd(4.5months) has decided that she just absolutely must be cuddled from 5.30pm-7pm. She sounds like she's being swung by the ankles if I put her in her rocker! how DARE I cook! God forbid I should feed and shower her big brother! Don't even think about reading him a story without her!!

He was always a cryer at bedtime which hurts my heart, compounded by the fact that his nocturnal mountaineering forced us to take the side off his cot and give him with unprecedented freedom! The other night I'd been in and out to his screaming for an hour when I said 'honey, Cady is so hungry. Can you hear here? You've had your dinner, and your belly is nice and full, can you lie here with your eyes closed and go to sleep so mummy can give Cady her milk?'
Voilà! Not another peep, and would you believe, not once again since?!? Hows that for mother-guilt. I feel awful. But it was that or lock myself in the shower and rock back and forth til hubby came home ;)

[Daydream Believer]

Boy! My last post was stupid long! Sorry!
I so know what you're saying MelbourneMummy! I am exactly the same!! Tonight I've already been up and down 5 times inspecting noises. Bah! I used the sleep at 9.30ish, but without hubby (and since bubhub) it's more like 11pm! :rolleyes:

[TinyLittleTootsies]

Boy! My last post was stupid long! Sorry!
I so know what you're saying MelbourneMummy! I am exactly the same!! Tonight I've already been up and down 5 times inspecting noises. Bah! I used the sleep at 9.30ish, but without hubby (and since bubhub) it's more like 11pm! :rolleyes:

It wasnt stupid long.. I read it all! But then again.. I am home alone with nothing to do... :p kidding!! lol (there are other posts to read too..and I read yours haha)

11pm now.. bed time for you! I don't get exhausted enough until at least 1am. :eek: I am silly. With all these storm noises in Melbourne i should just go to sleep telling myself all the noises are the storm!

[Daydream Believer]

Yup! I tell myself, it's just the house expanding, the aircon cooling down, the dishwasher, a frog etc... Never helps!
OH!!! The other night!!!! A cat jumped up and grabbed onto the flyscreen on my window with it's evil little claws! NO JOKES, I absolutely pooped myself! I jumped up and held a lounge cushion infront of me, like it could save me. I then turned on every internal and external light, locked all the doors and peeked out the window, expecting a knife wielding assassin, only to see these two devil cats walking away. I think I have a streak of white hair now...
:eek: :eek: :eek:
Great. I'll never sleep tonight, now that I've relived it.
Also, I guess ds just had a nightmare. He screamed, and I was in there within second and he was sound asleep. Eeerie!
Ps it's only 10.30 in Queensland, I've still got half an hour ;)

[TinyLittleTootsies]

Yup! I tell myself, it's just the house expanding, the aircon cooling down, the dishwasher, a frog etc... Never helps!
OH!!! The other night!!!! A cat jumped up and grabbed onto the flyscreen on my window with it's evil little claws! NO JOKES, I absolutely pooped myself! I jumped up and held a lounge cushion infront of me, like it could save me. I then turned on every internal and external light, locked all the doors and peeked out the window, expecting a knife wielding assassin, only to see these two devil cats walking away. I think I have a streak of white hair now...
:eek: :eek: :eek:
Great. I'll never sleep tonight, now that I've relived it.
Also, I guess ds just had a nightmare. He screamed, and I was in there within second and he was sound asleep. Eeerie!
Ps it's only 10.30 in Queensland, I've still got half an hour ;)

Hahahaha.. that cat story.. is so funny, because I was going to write MY cat story which is almost the same and then I didn't because it would be too long ;) but I will now hehe. I was breastfeeding and so had turned on the lights in my room. The curtain was open but I didn't realise that until I heard a big bang right outside. I realised the cutain was open enough for someone to look in and creeped out because my boob was hanging there lol. So I popped it in and jumped up to shut the cutain telling myself something fell down in the wind outside. Just as I shut the window the security door rattles and the doorhandle rattles then the tree outside my front door shakes (front door near our main bedroom window). OMG I panicked... all my blood turned cold and I froze on the spot and then I ran to my DD in her room, ran her back and put her in the porta cot in my room and then grabbed the house phone and thankfully the girls stayed asleep but I literally stayed awake all night waiting for someone to break in!! THen the next night when DH was home, I turned on the outside lights and in half an hour the same thing happened.. sounded like someone trying to rip the security door off and open the door handle. He runs outside and it was cats trying to catch the moths in our security lights!! I was so happy to find out I didn't have a stalker and that all the window clangs and trees shaking seem to be these two cats all the time. It still scares me all the time but now I remind myself to be ****ed off that the neighbour lets her cats out at night lol. I am just glad I didn't call 000 hahaha.

[Daydream Believer]

Lol! Stupid cats! I've got myself all creeped out now. And I posted in another thread (heebie jeebies) and all these other peoples fears and paranoias have just heaped on top of my own and I feel like I've had 14 espressos, I'm so jumpy! Lol...
Oh well. Sorry to SorensMum for hijacking your thread, but I guess support for fellow nightshift widows was what your original intention was, right? This counts... :)

Gah! What was that noise in the ensuite?!?! :laughing:

[Guest1234]

Df starts work Monday night, doing predominantly night shifts. Not sure on how often and what time yet, but at a guess 4 shifts on, 4 off; 4pm til 2am.
Currently I'm looking forward to it :) and I don't think it will be so bad, even though last time he worked night shifts was nearly 2 years ago and back then I only had one baby.

Sent from my HTC Desire

[Hooves]

I kind of am. DP starts work at 2 am so he's asleep by 7.30 - 8.00pm. So after I get home at 5pm, we eat dinner and then he's asleep. So it feels kind of the same!!!!

Very ALONE


Yep this is similar to me. He starts at 4am, and doesn't finish work until 6pm, most days. By the time he gets home he is barely able to eat his dinner, let alone help out with the family.

I have found I tend to stay up late reading threads, and posting on the net, or playing on fb. Just for that adult interaction. The only thing that makes me able to live this way, or deal with his working hours, is the fact that he has started to take his time off during the day he is supposed to have. So I get him for 2 sometimes 3 hours in the middle.

Today I got to spend 40 minutes with him, as he was just too busy.

Thankfully the weekend is here, and once he finally arises from bed tomorrow, we get family time.


Thankfully also, the internet makes me feel less isolated and alone. The loneliness is sometimes difficult. I find more so at night, then during the day.

[Daydream Believer]

I agree hooves, night time is mostly the loneliest. I'm lucky in that I can turn on the tv or radio and just feel comforted by the noise, but I know a lot of people that that doesn't work for.
And I think you're right about the adult interaction on bh or fb.

I do have to say though when hubby is at work, and it's only 2pm (but feels like 10pm) and I'm staring down the barrel of a loooong evening with a needy, hungry 4month and a generally 2yr-old-behaving 2yr old, I can feel pretty lonely then too... :)

[Hooves]

I agree hooves, night time is mostly the loneliest. I'm lucky in that I can turn on the tv or radio and just feel comforted by the noise, but I know a lot of people that that doesn't work for.
And I think you're right about the adult interaction on bh or fb.

I do have to say though when hubby is at work, and it's only 2pm (but feels like 10pm) and I'm staring down the barrel of a loooong evening with a needy, hungry 4month and a generally 2yr-old-behaving 2yr old, I can feel pretty lonely then too... :)

Yep that can be very hard. The time seems to just drag on and on, too.

[TinyLittleTootsies]

Aghhhh... this is what I HATE about DH being nightshift... when things go wrong!!

My toilet and shower are overflowing, bath is gurgling, back door has water coming up to it.

Yep... I look online and oblivious to me, Melbourne is flash flooding and my house is in one of the flooding areas.

DH is too busy to help me becuase he is working in emergency covering a shift and they are working their butts off.

(I called my Dad... how lame lol, but he gave me good advice so i feel better :D)

[BlissedOut]

chelleylane - This is absolutely what I made the thread for. Interesting to see we are one of the more active threads in the forum this late at night. I guess being a NSW has the same effect on others.

melbournemummy - Uh oh! I hope you're okay and you don't get flooded!

[cookie087]

Not exactly a night shift widow, but my dp is away for military duties for a few months at a minimum so I definitely know how your feeling. Nights are horrible. Expecially tonight. For some reason tonight is much worse than the others, I've spent the majority of the night in tears (sad I know) but just wish the military days were over. I feel for all you that have done this for years.

Question... Do you/your partners do it by choice, or cos they have to?

[TinyLittleTootsies]

cookie! I think military Dads being away for months on end is much much worse! You poor thing. I am sad that you are crying!! :( When does he come back? Where is he posted?

My DH chose these two nights because he is on holidays but was offered $80 an hour to come in. So it is a choice tonight. When he is not on holidays it is the hospitals choice (doctor) and he would be fired if he said no! So not really a choice. It is on and off though, not all the time for me so it is a little different and I usually put up and shut up because it is nothing hard really I jsut like to sook when I am home along and scared.

Is your baby a good sleeper at all?

[cookie087]

Melbouremummy - he's posted in the nt, not too sure when he will be back, if the military keep up the way they are, it wont be until march 2012 :(

My son is an ok sleeper, he turns two next week so gonna be hard having dp away. I think tonight was harder than normal as my son was at his bio fathers, so all alone tonight - that and pregnancy hormones getting the better of me!

[BlissedOut]

Not exactly a night shift widow, but my dp is away for military duties for a few months at a minimum so I definitely know how your feeling. Nights are horrible. Expecially tonight. For some reason tonight is much worse than the others, I've spent the majority of the night in tears (sad I know) but just wish the military days were over. I feel for all you that have done this for years.

Question... Do you/your partners do it by choice, or cos they have to?

Awww... I could never do that, you must both be strong people. DH has been offered work away (2 weeks on, 1 week off), but we both decided that it'd have to be an absolutely amazing salary for him to miss out on seeing his kids and I every day.

DH has to for his job, but could probably find alternative work, or weasel his way into day shifts, but the pay is significantly better for overnight work and it's also one of the easier shifts at his work.

[Guest1234]

With Df its choice, he prefers night shift to day shift. He earns $10 more per hour working night. It works out well for us.

Sent from my HTC Desire

[sammyplus3]

my dh's typical shifts are 4am - 4pm, 1.30pm - 5.30 or 7.30pm and 11pm - 3am a few 9pm - 3am shifts too

the 1.30 and 11pm shifts a mostly splits meaning he will do them both in 1 day and mostly 3 or so in a row

if his 4am shifts are in a row its means he goes to bed at 7ish pm takes him between 30mins - 1 hour to get home

it means alot of lonelyness for me and not alot of adult interaction we only have 1 car so i cant go out anywhere as i hatepublic transport

dh is doing a total of 60.5 hours next week arrrgghh right in my fertile time for our ttc mission its not looking good 7 days in a row

i have to say i like the night shifts better as i like to watch tv in bed dh doesnt and it means i get to see him during the day a little more than the 4am shifts as i will see him while he is trying to stay awake enought to eat his dinner then he goes to bed
i guess the bonus of all of it is good money and he gets 3 -4 days off in a row but he tends to pick up other shifts if he has more than 2 days off

[sammyplus3]

Yup! I tell myself, it's just the house expanding, the aircon cooling down, the dishwasher, a frog etc... Never helps!
OH!!! The other night!!!! A cat jumped up and grabbed onto the flyscreen on my window with it's evil little claws! NO JOKES, I absolutely pooped myself! I jumped up and held a lounge cushion infront of me, like it could save me. I then turned on every internal and external light, locked all the doors and peeked out the window, expecting a knife wielding assassin, only to see these two devil cats walking away. I think I have a streak of white hair now...
:eek: :eek: :eek:
Great. I'll never sleep tonight, now that I've relived it.
Also, I guess ds just had a nightmare. He screamed, and I was in there within second and he was sound asleep. Eeerie!
Ps it's only 10.30 in Queensland, I've still got half an hour ;)


lol im the same mostly if i watch a murder shows before. my cat did the same thing the other night and i was half way through watching the first 48hrs i shat my self came out to the kitchen/lounge and grabbed my kids plastic bat lol when the cat came to the back door and meowed i shat again bloody cat!!

my ds does the same he crys and screams in his sleep too

[pinkbella]

Can I join in? DH has been helping out another team for work (project manager) he started in Sept and is only meant to work until January but they now want him until March Argh!!
He usually works 4 nights on, 5 nights off, 5 nights on, 4 nights off. And it's 7:30pm - between 4-7am depending how the night goes. Tonight he won't be home until 7am as it's the busiest night.

I have to admit that it's only the last two months that ive got a good routine going! I struggled in the beginning and was locked up in the bedroom as soon as he left at 6:30pm lol!
Now I'm much better, we head to the bedroom at 7:45pm :)
Luckily our nursery is connected to our bedroom! And we have an ensuite and tv in our room so I lock ourselves in the room and put on the alarm, We also have a panic button next to my side of the bed lol! Paranoid much!!???
It's scary when DH isn't home, we have 6 rooms 5 upstairs and a study downstairs. So every noise I'm on the phone to DH lol!

Oh and I've just started (last night) trying to get DD to self settle (11 m.o) it's so hard!!! I gave in last night n she slept with me in bed! Wish me luck tonight!

[*Chels*]

My Dh works nights shifts,every day is different hours,but usually 4.30-5.30pm start,and can finish as late as 4am.I hate the 4am finish,but 1 am is cool.
I dont go to bed until around 10-11pm.
I LOVE being by myself at night-its a b!tch to get dinner ready by 5pm(he takes it with him)and settle the kids,but by 7pm I am flying solo,can watch what I want on TV,hog the computer and have some wines!!
Wine helps me sleep,and takes away my fear:freakingout:
Sometimes I freak out being alone..most of the time its cool,I am used to it,.and DH works like 2 mins down the rd,so I feel safe.
Oh and on the cat thing- my cat grabs at the screen door when she wants it.So she pulls it back and then lets it bang.I am used to it now,but the when my bro was babysitting one night he shat himself thimnking someone was breaking in lol

[Beck13]

You scaredy Cats!!! Made me laugh though, I remember when we first moved into town (used to live outa town on a property) and dh was doing 9.30pm-6am I would jump at every noise too, and the cat across the road used to come and try to eat our cats food and they would end up in a fight which would scare the bejesus out of me!

chelleylane - my ds2 was the same at bed/dinner time, but he is now 7mths old and I can reassure you that the dinner/bedtime routine does get easier.

cookie087, dh does the night or afternoon shift out of need really. He doesn't have a trade and as we live in a rural area there is limited jobs nearby and this job just popped up. He still has to travel about 40 mins but the extra money for the night shift is good.

MelbourneMummy hope you avoided getting flooded - geez whats going on half the country is flooded.

pinkbella good luck with the self settling - so worth it in the end but I agree it is heartbreaking to hear them whinging.

sammyplus3 I'm with you, I like to be able to sit in bed and watch tv and we get more time together now. Good luck next week - boy dh will be one exhausted boy after 60.5hrs work and ttc!

[1CrazyMoose]

Hello I am another "night shift widower" dh works from 4:00pm (leaves at 3:00pm) and finishes between 3-5am (then has to drive an hour home!) he does this Monday to Saturday nights (6nights)

It's hard with a terrible 2 and a 6month old but we are kind of used to it! Kids don't see alot of him and routine can be hard.

I find I do get lonely alot but that's part of it. We just lost our house in the brissy flood so it's all a little crazy here and we haven't been able to catch up much.

Anyway that's me! Lol look forward to a few chats :)

[pinkbella]

Chels - Oh I feel you re: dinners! Although DH leaves at about 6:30pm so I still have a bit of time to cook, but it's quiet tricky to try keep DD on a routine and cook etc! Luckily we're on a healthy eating diet so it's mostly sandwiches lately which isn't too time consuming.

Poshgem - I am so sorry to hear about your house. I hope things get back on track for you guys! :hugs:

We just live about 5 mins drive to work so he really is just down the road, but i still hate it! But lucky on nights DD is being difficult (i.e. won't settle and just cries) he is able to drive home to help out for a bit.
But on a usual night shift he will get home 4-7am sometime and if DD is awake (she wakes that time when he isn't home!) he will have a shower then change DD's nappy and feed and resettle her for me. He's such a great hubby! He's so tired from work but insists on resettling her for me :goodvibes: Then he will sleep until 11am-12noon, have "breakky", then go for an afternoon nap with DD at about 3pm - 5pm. Then it's wake up time, dinner time, and then he gets ready for work.

Only one more night after tonight and DH is home for 4 days :smiliedance::smiliedance::smiliedance:

[Daydream Believer]

Cookie, The military thing must be so hard! My dad was in the navy til I was 12. I went to 8 different school before grade 7. The. When my bro was born, he decided to retire and my brother went to the same school from prep-12 and me from grade 8-12, so that was good. I have to say I don't have very many memories of dad, by the time he was 'home' I was a teen girl and we didn't speak the same language. Mum told me then and now that he thought I was a monster (I wasn't! I was moody, hormonal and unpopular at school!) but since leaving home we have become crazy close. I kinds think he's awesome :) a bit of a daddys girl here :)

Poschgem, I'm so so sad for you, losing your house. I so hope you've got support and a way to start putting it all back together. My in laws live in Jindalee and avoided going under by less than half a metre. I so hate that something like this happened. Where it was totally unavoidable. It must have been gut wrenching, knowing you were going to be affected.

MelbMummy! Crazy! Did you stay dry? I would have been flipping out!!! That beats a cat on the flyscreen anyday!!

So if we are going to do this thread thingo, do we want to list whose hubby does what?
I'm interested...
I know we have a doctor...
My hubby drives coal trains in central Queensland...

Oh, and Cookie, my hubby gets no choice in the matter of when he works, in fact they can change it with no notice if it suits them. But as far as we are told, and have experienced, they are pretty understanding and particularly as far as 'family' goes. Having said that, he is qualified to do many things other than this, we just couldn't pass up the opportunity to earn this kind of money. And when he applied we never dreamed we would actually get it. From applying to starting it took a year, and there were 7000 applicants for 50 positions. When they accepted him, we were stunned, and couldn't really say no after everything he'd been through (even though it meant him moving when I was 32 weeks pregnant) :)

Well that's my novel of a story for tonight. I'm gonna get kicked out for excessive posts... ;)

[pinkbella]

Chelleylane - no no no no, it wasn't me who lost their home... It was poshgem.

My DH is a Project Manager in I.T... But we work for the same big company... (except im on maternity leave for 18 months) I'm sure some of you love our company and some of you hate it so I won't mention it :laughing::laughing:

[Me&MrMagoo]

DF works 4 nights a week, 4.30pm till whenever they get the job done. About the latest he's been home is 3am?
Its quite nice most of the time, with a newborn it was harder, worse with a reflux baby first time, then with a non-sleeping almost 2 year old and a newborn (who thankfully slept reasonably). Now, with 2 toddlers (2 months off turning 3 and 13 months) its pretty good. I sloth a lot. I clean the house at night. I sleep peacefully, without someone trying to cuddle me in the heat (I hate sleep cuddlers :laughing: :laughing:)

Ditto ... Except I only have one child ...

My dh also works during the day ... So his day goes like this:

Up at 7 - play with Ds
Go to work at 7.45
Home at 3 - play with Ds
Go to work at 4.30
Home anywhere from midnight onwards ...

He does this 7 days a week ... It does get lonely especially with a refluxing non sleeper but ds seems to be out growing both if those now so it's getting a bit easier ...

I also co sleep with ds and love it - dh is on the sofa for snoring, and I actually hate sharing a bed with him now!! Lol ...

[Daydream Believer]

I know pinkbella, I fixed that up. I was hoping I'd caught it before anyone *d'oh!*
there must have been something I wanted to say to you too, I was repeating the names over in my head. For the life of me I can't remember, so how's about 'hi!' :)
Ooh, that's some good maternity leave! I was allowed 12 months unpaid with my first, and for my second, my employer was... Well... My ds... Lol he is hard to negotiate with at 2yrs old!

[pinkbella]

I know pinkbella, I fixed that up. I was hoping I'd caught it before anyone *d'oh!*
there must have been something I wanted to say to you too, I was repeating the names over in my head. For the life of me I can't remember, so how's about 'hi!' :)
Ooh, that's some good maternity leave! I was allowed months unpaid with my first, and for my second, my employer was... Well... My ds... Lol he is hard to negotiate with at 2yrs old!


:laughing: Either i'm too fast or you're too slow :p

Bwahaha, well your new boss sounds like a cutie pie :D I guess maybe you could ask him for a payrise or soemthing instead? :laughing:

Idk how you ladies with more than one baby do it. I can't imagine another baby atm, except im so friggen CLUCKY :freakingout::freakingout::freakingout::freakingou t::freakingout: And thing is, DH isn't saying "No we cant have another one yet!" He's actually encouraging the idea :freakingout:

[Daydream Believer]

Lol :laughing: I have a feeling if I ask him for a payrise he'll say 'yooooo gabba gabba!!!!!'

Having more than one isn't too bad, but then I only have two. It has its moments...
Talk about clucky! We had a really good labor (as far as labours go) with dd, and I hadn't even birthed the placenta yet and dh says 'makes it easier to think about the next one, hey' the midwife almost slapped him :)
But it related to an earlier conversation where we were terrified it would be ds' birth all over again.

*secret squirrel* but I just bought some OPKs off eBay :) I've never used them before. TBH I'm going to use them mainly out of interest, as I've never once known if I was ovulating, and I think it'd be cool to know your body like that. But what the heck, if I KNOW when it's o-day... Why not? ;) We reckon if we leave it too long, one of us will chicken out... :)
ETA: ps... You're just ninja-fast, cos I'm pretty sure I was lightening quick... And I say just do it! Cluckyness is only cured by labour :) for me, not even pregnancy or having a newbie eases it... The only time I don't actively want another baby is while I can still vividly remember the 'ring of fire'... Lol

[pinkbella]

Oh you are horrible! Why are you encouraging my cluckiness??? :eek: LOL

I had a lovely labour with DD, I was pleasantly surprised :D She came on her due date too! I actually wasn't sure if i was in labour yet? I got to hospital and was told I was having her TODAY i'm like omg what? Really? are you sure? I was already 4cms lol. and because I had a lovely labour first time, for sure i will end up with a horrible one next time! Why? Cause it's just my luck!!!!

Yes I had a great labour with DD but then 6 says after my appendix almost exploded so lucky me ended up with major surgery 6 days after birth!!!!!!!!!! ARGH!!! Worst pain ever! I didn't see DD for a whole week while recovering and then coudlnt hold her on my own for almost 2 weeks...

Okay enough of my life story :laughing:

I've tried OPK's they're great!!! Im very irregular so it was fantastic to find out when you ovulate :) I hope it works well for you too!! :fingerscrossed:

[bubbies4me]

May I join in?

DH is a shift worker so works 3 different shifts over a 2 weeks period in either 3 or 4 day blocks. So either 7am to 3pm, 3pm to 11pm or 11pm til 7am. It was hard at the start but now i have a good routine and it works if he is home or not. We see more of him now that when he was working just evenings and 5 days a week. He nearly always does 1 overtime shift while he has days off but the money is too good to say no.

I find leaving the tv on while DD is in bed i dont hear the noises but sometimes it is hard to go to sleep when its just me as our room is at the front of the house its getting easier.

I like the night shift as i get the bed to myself and a sleep in as he is home before DD wakes up. He is a really heavy sleeper so doesnt hear us during the day so no need to try and stay quiet.

[Daydream Believer]

Poor thing! That's the pits! Having a great birth that u would have recovered from super quickly, only to get stuck in hospy 6 days later! Bet that played havoc with breast-feeding (if you did/do). Yes... I'm a bad influence... Non clucky husbands hate me! :)


I've had maybe 6 natural cycles on my own. I've had irregular af since about 15 and have been on the pill since then until I stopped at 24 to ttc our first. BAM! A couple of weeks later I'm UTD! Then I got my first post baby cycle at 9months after birth, 2 months of no AF, no BFP, then... What do you know! Pregnant again! I'm more than blessed in this. My family history is sooo bad for fertility, and mum and I were both soooo certain I would have trouble... It will be great to finally understand my body at 26 :)

[princessmummy]

I am a night shift widow too dh left at 10pm won't be home till 11.30am I am on my ph at the moment & won't be able to keep up so will remember to bring the laptop to bed tomorrow night

[pinkbella]

Yep, milk took 6 days to come in so I had to give formula. When my milk came my appendix went lol so I couldnt even express cos the drugs dried up a lot of my milk. I still ended up bf part time though for three months. I still feel bad for maybe not trying extra harder biut everything was so hard then. Add in colic then eczema and allergies!!! Ahh doesn't end lol but now at 11 months she is doing wonderfully! I thought she was never going to crawl cos her eczema was that bad she just sits there scratching doesn't wanna do anything but scratch! But what do y know! She crawled n then walked at 10 months old and now she runs hahaha!

Wow that's such a blessing! It's wonderful to know your body a bit more, it's amazing what miracles come our way :)

On topic of night shifts, I don't mind it cos then DH spends more time with DD during the day when she's awake rather than coming home from a day job and it's DD bedtime iykwim

[TinyLittleTootsies]

Oopps! Found this thread again right before I am about to go to bed (about time too.. almost 2am) like I said.. I wait until I am exhausted so that I can have a deep sleep and not jump awake at every sound lol.

House is fine! Did not even come close to water inside. I wasn't too worried about it here, but i was worred about the storm drains backing up so much that the toilet and shower would end up on my carpets lol. Did not make it that far phew just had to attack both bathrooms with bleach this morning.

I would chat some more, but I think all of you sensible ladies have long gone to bed!! Wishing you all a peaceful night :p