How many attempts did it take for you to get your BFP?

[Livvyloo]

Hi successful IVF'ers,

Feeling a little bit low today as AF has shown up the day before my BETA for my first FET.. and like this is never going to work for us. I've had 1 BFN from a stim cycle and now 1 BFN from an FET. Both times transferring 1 embryo (high quality both times). I'm 28 and DH is 33.. fit and healthy with unexplained IF.

I guess I'm looking for a little hope and I thought this might be a place to find it. I can't help but think that if my first two cycles didn't end with a BFP then what chances do I have of EVER having success!??

So, in that light, can you tell me how many cycles it took you to get pregnant via IVF? Did you think it was just..never going to work..?

Thanks all,
:)

[mummyplease]

Hi Livvyloo

I thought I would respond as I remember feeling exactly the same way as you and I am sure many others have too! So sorry that AF showed up for you.

It took me 4 transfers to get pregnant the first time (1 stim and 3 FETs) which unfortunately ended in a m/c. I then got pregnant again on my next FET and have just hit 12wks.

All my BFN's were when I transferred 1 great embryo on natural cycles. My 2 BFP's have been the result of transferring 2 embryo's on medicated cycles.

I would suggest speaking to your FS about other options if you are still having no luck after your next FET.

Try and stay positive and relax because you will get your BFP - it just happens faster for some people. I stayed focussed by remembering my end goal which was to have a baby!

Take care

[TNTbub]

Hi,

I had 2 failed IUI's and a cancelled IUI. And Im glad I cancelled the 3rd IUI.


I moved on to IVF and got a first go success. DH sperm isnt good and thats why I ended up having to do IVF.

TNTbub

[smileygirl]

hugs...ivf is very hard :hugs:

took us 3 full stim cycles

we changed something each cycle to fine tune...hope your next one is the sticky one:babydust1:

[Mrs P]

Sorry your cycles haven't been successful

It took us 9 cycles before we got our first BFP. Dh has bad swimmers. I had a lap and they found some endo and after 6 failed cycles I had another lap, more endo removed and had a biopsy for natural killer cells. Treated and am now pregnant.

I was 20-21 when we were transferring. I changed clinics after my first FS refused to test. Might be worth getting them just to change things up. I didn't ask questions until 4 failed cycles

[Livvyloo]

Hi everyone,

Thanks so much for your responses, it actually has made me feel a lot better to know that it doesn't always happen first time around for everyone (but for some lucky ones it does!).

mummyplease - it's very heartening to know that there are people who felt exactly like I feel now that eventually had success. congratulations on hitting 12 weeks on your recent pregnancy, that's wonderful news and you must feel so much better. Your story really does make me feel like perhaps I do have some hope. I think I'm just really scared that I'll never get pregnant, that we'll put so much money, time and emotional energy into something that will never work. It terrifies me, I want to be a mother so much.

TNT - congrats on your BFP. Good idea cancelling the last IUI.. sounds like it was the best idea for you guys. We never did IUI even though DH's sperm is totally fine because we wanted as much chance of success as we could and didn't feel like IUI would give enough of an increased chance on natural conception for us.

smiley - thanks for your response.. 3 full stim cycles hey.. that also makes me feel better that perhaps I do still have a chance.. since I've still only had the one full stim cycle. congratulations :) I think I'll use the terminology with my FS and ask if we need to "fine tune" anything for this FET because I feel like if we do the exact same thing we'll have the exact same result. If the two embies i have left frozen both survive the thaw then I plan to have 2 transferred which will be something different cos so far I've only had one done.. maybe that will help.. not sure. But i definitely want to make some changes this time around to see if we have more of a chance.

MrsP - congratulations and well done for perservering for so long! Wow, good on you! Ive had a lap too but I don't think they did a biopsy at the time. Can you tell me a bit about "natural killer cells" and what they are? I am going into my clinic on wed to see my dr and ask questions about if we need to do something different.. i think you're right, i want to make sure they're willing to investigate what might be going on.

THanks to everyone who replied :)

[jfblady72]

hi

took me 8 stim cycles which included first 3 cancelled :( (which convinced me i was a total barren freak)...messed with my head badly never recovered :rolleyes: ;) ......another 2 xfer's with one a crap embie and one with 2 good embies...BFN's...by this point i was officially"desperate" , next stim thought it failed and cried (while drinking red wine) only to get a positive BT a few days later....but ended in m/c at 10 weeks....another stim, BFN....then finally after almost 2 years in IVF...i got my little man who stuck like white on rice and thank god cos he saved me from a nervous breakdown i reckon!!!! :D its hard when it doesnt work, its hard to stay positive i know...i know of a girl here who did 18 cycles b4 they got a BFP :eek:...so keep the faith! :goodvibes:

[Kismet]

Hi

Yes keep the faith Livvyloo, it took me 2 1/2 years of IVF = 12 cycles which including 9 stims, 2 cancelled cycles, 2 m/c & on my final attempt I fell pregnant with my precious little girl, however I had quite a few challenges. I unfortunately had to look at IVF as a long term thing not a short one. However, I never lost hope, I refused to let it beat me. Yes I felt desparate & was beginning to think it would never happen, IVF can do that to you, but I had to perservere bcs this is what I had to do to get pregnant. But don't be disheartened at the number of attempts some of us take. Some people get it on the 1st go but this is rare & very lucky, I was cautioned during my 1st councelling with the clinic that it's more common for it to take on average upto 5 goes & for some of us a bit longer & if your'e lucky less than that. Everyone is different & has different things going on with their bodies, and unfortunately not everything is known. Many perfect embryos are formed but still lose their way & don't implant, yet many not so perfect embryos do find their way and miraculously create a life. I was always told there are no guarantees and alot of unknowns, so this is why I relied alot on faith and hope.
There are other options to consider besides a standard protocol, if one type of protocol isn't working try another one, my last cycle just about everything was thrown into it. I thank goodness for the internet because it allowed me to do my own research and I found bubhub where I have met so many ladies going thru the exact feelings, ups & downs, all the processes & I really don't think I could have got thru everything I went thru without bubhub. I did all this on my own & I often get asked how I did it, my answer was always what I said above - perservere because this is what I have to do to get pregnant, end of story. Each failed cycle I let myself grieve it but I had to then let it go to move onto the next. I did not let IVF rule my life I just let it become part of it, much like a routine, IYKWIM. I would think to myself if I had a life long illness I would have to take medication for it, so I would liken it to treating an illness & wait for it to heal and in the end I knew I would get there. I look at my little girl everyday and am soooo grateful for everything I had to go through to get her, she is totally worth every bit of it. I didn't care about the money, I somehow always managed to scrape it up, but I realise things have drastically changed since I got pregnant so can only imagine the extra financial strain ivf is placing on everyone now, it was hard enough before, the cost of ivf is outrageous & the so called assistance from medicare is disgraceful. So many people are going to miss out of their right to become parents because they can't afford the cost for treatment which utterly sucks.
The only other thing I can tell you is to ask your FS what else can be done, be proactive in your treatment.

You've come to the right place for support, alot of us have been where you are, don't be afraid to ask questions and vent or just pop in & say hi, bubhub is a good outlet. I hope your ivf conquest is a short one.

[pumpernickel]

I also remember wondering if it was ever going to work. Was I ever going to be a mother?

We got lucky on cycle number 4 - all fresh.

And again on cycle number 7 - 1 FET, 2 fresh (the fresh was the lucky one).

If it didn't happen on cycle 4 I just don't know when we would have called it quits.

There is one poster here who got lucky on cycle 18 and 19 simply by adding Aspirin to her cycles. I find that totally amazing and so inspirational.

[LulusMum]

Hi, it took us 9 transfers to get our son, 6 full stim and 3 FETs (5 of which ended in chemical pregnancies, 3 BFN and 1 BFP, he was our 6th full stim and 9th transfer. From his cycle we had 4 frozen embies which we used for 2 FETs after his birth - one ended in chemical and one BFN. Decicided to do one more full stim and then possibly throw in the towel but hit the jackpot in a royal way, TWINS from a double fresh transfer and 8 in the freezer. It was a long hard road to get my Max, but like others on here, i wouldnt have it any other way and wouldnt change a thing

[cobbec]

I did 3 IUI's with BFN... Our 1st IVF with 2 embryos transferred resulted in our BFP... we were one of the lucky ones... and then we were lucky enough to have a natural surprise after TTC with number 1 for 2yrs before going to FS...

Good luck and stay positive...

[HaileesMummy]

Hi livvyloo! I was not sure if I should post or nit so I slept on it and decided (obviously) that I would.
We had to do ivf (icsi) due to dh low motility (lazy sperm). I have had a bub b4 with ex and got preg while on the pill so we knew I was ok! I had never had any "girly" problems either! Period like clockwork, perfect regular cycle.
Anyways, we were not put on the pill first. I started off on nasal spray, then injections and spray, then just injections. On my 3rd scan it showed I had gr8 number of follies and had my trigger injection on the Saturday night and had my epu Monday morning. I had 22 follies collected and didn't need even panadol just a heat pack and I was only slightly tender. However I got constipated (commen apparently) and after some laxative (movicol is a dead set life saver) the next morning I was fine!!
Tuesday we rang and we had 16 fertilize and booked in for the Wednesday (2days after epu) for emby transfer. We ended up with 7 surviving embies and had 1 (4 cell) emby put in and have 6 embies frozen.
Pain was no worse than a papsmear having transfer btw!
I had a bleed (old blood) 10 days past transfer and got my bfp 18 days past transfer!!
We are now 19 weeks preggers and everything is gr8!
So we were one of those so very lucky ones who got our bfp first go! I admire those girls (and their dh) who go through all this over and over as just that 1 cycle did my head in.
I have nothing but respect and admiration for those long time ivfers.
So I wanted to say I really hope you get your much longed for bfp soon darling. Good luck. X

[Livvyloo]

Hi again ladies

Many thanks again to all those who have been generous with their time and experiences in their responses. I find you all really inspirational and I so hope one day I'm able to join you here and give someone else hope one day.

jfblady - good on you for your perserverence. I know the feeling about "never recovering" from experiences had in the IVF process. Some of the disappointments I've already felt through just 2 failed cycles have been overwhelming and I think have shaped who I am and who I am going to become. Certainly how I'm living my life right now too. i do feel like I'm at that "desperate" stage.. so I really relate to that. I'll try to keep the faith.. it feels like it's dwindling at the moment. 2 cycles might not seem a lot to go through but as everyone here would know.. it is just so draining.. physically and emotionally.

kismet - thanks so much for taking the time to tell your story and give some advice. I really think you're right regarding exploring other options besides the "standard protocol", that's precisely why DH and I are going to see our Dr this coming wednesday, I feel at the moment like we're doing the same thing and getting the same result.. so why wouldn't we do something different or something more? I do plan on really quizzing my dr about it (oh he just loves me lol). In some ways I think, like you, I don't let IVF run my life either. I am a person who enjoys being proactive in things, so injections/medications/scans etc don't drain me as much as they can do others emotionally (the side effects is another story though!!) when I'm "doing" something to actively try and help this situation I feel better and more motivated (so you can imagine in the 2ww I feel completely powerless and terrible). I do feel very consumed by it all though - mostly by the fear that it's never going to work. You're right though, I agree 100% that it's important to be proactive in the process and ask lots of questions, I'm pretty sure my FS hates me lol.. I never get out of his office in less than an hour, lol. he's always very nice though but I'm sure he rolls his eyes after I leave.

pumpernickel - that's really interesting that someone simply added aspirin to their routine and got BFP's.. I wonder what aspirin can do, I had always read NOT to take aspirin when TTC, so that's interesting. Congrats on your BFP, your story certainly gives me hope that perhaps all is not lost for me yet. It's also nice to know that others felt the same as me "will I ever be a mother"..

LulusMum - Congratulations on your twins, all those frozen embies and the perserverance it took to get there! That's so inspirational to me. I hope I can one day have a similar outcome. Thanks for sharing your story.

Cobbec - Very lucky to get a BFP on your first IVF cycle - congratulations! Wish that had happened for us. That said, you did go through IUI cycles that we didn't have to do so I guess we all have experiences that are hard in different ways.

HaileesMummy - Thanks for being willing to share your story after thinking it through :) It's a great story and I'm so pleased it worked out for you so quickly. Thank you for the luck and best wishes, hoping it works out for me and my DH sooner rather than later too. xo

[petalsinthewind]

Livvy- it so hard hon, I did 2 full stim cycles before we got our bfp our first we got no fertilization at all and I was knocked around for weeks our 2nd full stim cycle worked a dream and I gave birth to a healthy little boy 4 days ago please don't give up there is hope for everyone is just a little hard to see when we get those disappointing results. You will get ur bfp soon.


Sent from my iPhone using Bub Hub

[HaileesMummy]

Petalsinthewind!!! Congrats sweetheart! I hope your labour was as easy as it could be and your littleman is strong and healthy! :-)

[HaileesMummy]

Livvyloo hang in there hunny! Only one more day to wait! X

[Livvyloo]

Haileesmummy - i think it's too late, in fact i know it is. I'm still bleeding intermittantly and my HPT's are getting lighter :( :( so devastated.

[HaileesMummy]

It's not over til it's over!! I'm thinking of u sweet. Let me know!! X

[digbyleigh]

Hi livvyloo, firstly just wanted to say how sorry I am for you. I hope the posts on here have helped you some with "hope" that in time it WILL work for you also.
Here's my story, will be as brief as I can.

4 years of infertility. We did 9 cycles of clomid followed by 2 fresh cycles than 1 frozen cycle. (had a hysteroscopy after fresh cycle #1 to remove polyps) after 3 failed cycles than got tested for NK cells (endo biopsy) & had a lap/hysteroscopy. Diagnosed with severe endo, thankfully all removed. Then did our first long long down reg cycle, followed by a frozen transfer which we finally got out BFP!! So for us 3 fresh & 2 frozen cycle so 5 cycles in total.
I do highly recommend testing as there may or may not be a reason embie hasn't implanted properly & most of the time with the right protocol used will help you on your way to getting your BFP!! Wishing you all the best for the future xxxxx

[Livvyloo]

digby - thanks for your lovely message of support. It's been a hard week trying to come to terms with the fact that I was indeed pregnant and I'm now not.. my levels are slowly dropping.. wednesday morning they were down to 20 so I'm hoping by Monday they'll be below 5. Never thought I'd be HOPING my levels would go down, but the sooner they are, the sooner I can try again. Disappointingly my FS seems to want to try and make me wait a full month before starting again.. but it's ridiculous, I don't ovulate regularly, he wants me to wait until I have another period - that could be MONTHS away for me. I'm talking ot him on Monday though and hopefully he'll have come up with another plan of attack. Thanks for sharing your story - I did quite a few failed clomid cycles before starting on IVF too so I can really relate to your journey. I even had a laparoscopy/hysteo/d&c/dye studies etc.. but for me all was fine. At this point I think we're going to try another frozen cycle with our two remaining embies (the first time we'll have transferred more than one embryo) since this most recent FET did actually work in getting me pregnant (besides the very very unfortunate outcome in the long term).. it does imply that the protocol worked for my body, and with extra luteal phase support, perhaps we might get "third time lucky" after 1 failed fresh and 1 (ultimately) failed FET.

This post certainly gives me hope that if it doesn't work the first time then it doesn't necessarily mean it won't work the second/third/fourth/fifth etc.