Told to start weaning - MIL vent

[Milliner]

Oh I'm a bit angry, well actualy very angry!!!!!!!!! :mad:

My Mil has just told me that I should start to wean my DS as he is to reliant on me. WTF!!!! She also told me that he must be fully weaned at 1. WTF!!!!
He has always had problems sleeping and she thinks that BF is the problem and that if I stop he will sleep better. God she has made me sooooooo angry. I was BF for 18 months and I plan on BF DS until he weans himself, I told her this. She never BF both of her sons. Why does she think that she can tell me this.

There is my vent. I’m still very pi**ed off!!!!!!

[cwsmum]

Why do they think they can tell us what to do? :banghead:

I have kinda the opposite problem with my MIL...she told me that formula was better for bubs, and would be easier for me too, and then she could have them overnight more often. (Both my bubs have been formula fed but not coz of anything she said and DS has only stayed overnight a few times and only stayed once or twice before he turned 2). The other thing she liked to tell me when DS was little was that he WOULD NOT be toilet trained at all til he was at least 3yrs old and that he would still need a bottle to go to sleep til the same age...he toilet trained at 2.5yrs in less than a week (day trained only, but probably could have done nights too, but I was preg and didn't like the thought of extra washing) he also stopped having a bottle that week coz I just threw them all in the bin and never mentioned it to him.

I have given up on my MIL...nothing I do is ever gonna be done the way she thinks it should be so I just avoid seeing her, which isn't too hard coz she lives 40mins away :smiliedance:

I guess we are never gonna please them no matter what we do :rolleyes: so just keep doing things the way you want to do them, it's your bub not hers.

[Milliner]

Thank you!! She was treating me like BF was bad! I have nothing against FF bubs but I choose to BF because I feel thats best for both of us, she just kept on going " no no he needs to be weaned by 1"

We all try and do out best but that is never good enough.

[lovemybub]

Everytime I read a posting like this I thank God that I have a wonderful MIL. Sure, we don't agree on everything, but at least she trusts me to be a mother to my daughter!

I know you know this already, but you have the right to breastfeed as long as you like!!!! You should show your MIL all the literature that says babies benefit from being breastfed until AT LEAST 12 months of age - and beyond.

Perhaps your MIL saw that skit on 'Little Britain' and took it seriously...

I, too, plan on breastfeeding until DD weans herself. 10 months and she's not looking like it yet. She's quite happy with her three day feeds and some night time snacking - thank goodness for co-sleeping!

I have to confess that I started to wonder whether I should persevere with resettling DD at night without a feed and 'teach' her to sleep through, but why should I when sticking the boob in is so much easier on both of us? She'll sleep through when she's ready.

Actually, while there's a rant happening, I really hate that one of the first things people always ask is, "Is she sleeping through yet?" Like that's somehow your ultimate goal. So what if she still needs night feeds. I just lift my shirt and go back to sleep :sleeping: . It's not that big a deal for me.

Dig your heals in, girl, and do what you know is best :thumbsup:

[Bearskin]

It's funny how MIL's seem to take it upon themselves to offer unsolicited advice. I am amazed how many threads and posts I read regarding MIL's telling their DIL's how to parent their child.

My MIL approached my DH when DD was 4 weeks old and said, "I would be happier if Zoe was on the bottle." My lovely DH said, "What has it got to do with you? It's none of your business!".

And that is the sum total of it - its none of MIL's business how you choose to feed you child; as long as you are not feeding bubs poison etc and bubs is healthy then what does it matter how you feed bubs!

Maybe a comment along those lines will keep any further unwanted personal opinions away; just say, "Does it really matter how I feed my child? My child is happy, I am happy and DH is happy and that is all that matters." I bet she wont say another thing to you about raising your child after that.

Good luck and be strong :thumbsup:

[Natsmummy]

I know that it is upsetting but she is obviously just ignorant so all I can suggest is that you just smile and then continue doing exactly what you want. That is what I do!

[reAllytee]

Yet another glorious example of a wonderful smother-in-law !!!!
Honestly tell her where to stick it !!!!!
I have a wonderful MIL who berates me any chance she can now about how i didnt b/f my DS. Even told me i was a wuss when i said i couldnt do it anymore because i had tears in my nipples & breasts, blood spurting out etc yep just what every new mum needs !!!!!
She has even tried it on with DP who has told her to bugger off in no uncertain terms !!!

Honestly they need to back off & live their own lives & stop worrying about how we are raising our kids !!!!

Good on your for sticking with it your doing a great job :hugs:

[our little treasures]

Thank you!! She was treating me like BF was bad! I have nothing against FF bubs but I choose to BF because I feel thats best for both of us, she just kept on going " no no he needs to be weaned by 1"

We all try and do out best but that is never good enough.

I here you loud and clear..

Do what suits you it's all about peoples insecurities in life..

[Milliner]

Thanks for your replies guys I have just printed out some info off the ABA website and I will give that to her today.

[~EmsMum~]

Thanks for your replies guys I have just printed out some info off the ABA website and I will give that to her today.

good on you!!!!

if that was me I would of told her where to go

[tweedledee*tweedledum]

Why is that all In-Laws feel like they have a right to tell you what you are doing wrong, but rarely comment on what they think you are doing that is right. I especially hate comments from my MIL that contradict everything she did when she was raising her children. Her sons hate her guts for the way she treated them, so any "advice" she gives me is a joke as far as I am concerned. It is hard to stand up to them Mel, but the first "NO" is the hardest and then from then on hopefully it will get easier to defend yourself. I know you shouldn't have to, but unfortunately she is a part of your life and you can't avoid her forever! I think in some ways these women would almost respect you more if you stood up to them, not always, but I find when I stick up for my family she backs off for a few weeks.