She is always grizzling.....Why?

[Smurfette]

Up until DD started crawling she was always happy to amuse herself. Now she is not happy unless I'm holding her or paying her attention. She is unable to occupy herself for any lengh of time. She has lots of different toys, but not too many. I thought it was seperation anxiety at first, but now I'm not sure. I certainly can't leave the room without her crying and getting all wound up.
I really don't know what to do anymore, I just want her to be happy, it's almost like she is just constantly unhappy for whatever reason.

Has anyone gone through this with their little ones, how did you overcome it?

Thanks for listening, and oh, dd is now just over 12 months.

I actually posted this in the general advice and tips section first, but then decided this might be a better place for it.
I have always practiced AP so maybe that explains it. :confused: __________________

[reAllytee]

Dont worry we still go through these periods but being at 18mths now i think he is happy enough as long as he can see or hear me.
Its just a clingy period & it isnt too bad, i mean after all they will soon be off to school & wont even want to kiss us goodbye :crying:
It makes life hard to get things done i know but ive found i now involve Boof as much as i can & leave the rest till he is in bed otherwise its too much of a drama. As much as i hate rushing round & vacuuming, mopping etc while trying to run his bath of a nite while he plays with DP it means less hassle through the day & leaves lots of time for us to play together which is way more important really !
Remember this too shall pass :yes:

[Can I?]

At your DD's age she still doesn't have a personal identity that is separate from your identity. She is old enough to recognise that you are no longer with her, and then feels lost because she doesn't know what to do with herself without you there. You would cry too if you suddenly noticed that a part of yourself is missing. I understand it is frustrating to not be able to get up and make a drink or go to the toilet without having the grizzling in the background, but your DD just misses you.

At this age I found that my carrier was my best friend. If I needed to wash or hang clothes on the line I carried my son in the ergo and talked to him as we went. I could do the dishes, or cook with him in the ergo or in the high chair with me in the kitchen. If I was cleaning in the bedrooms he helped etc.

It really is a phase that your DD will grow out of, and she will be a much more independent and confident little girl if she knows that you will be there for her whenever she needs you.

[lovemybub]

I agree with Can I? My DD is 10 months old and is going through that whole recognition that she's separate from me phase. I just keep reminding myself that it will pass eventually, and the best thing I can do is to reassure her that I'm here and that's she's okay.

It does wear you down a bit sometimes, so I try and make sure that if I have things that I need to do, then I ask a grandma or an aunty over to 'play'. Otherwise, I look at it as a good excuse to sit around and enjoy time with my baby. Face it, you're never going to have another excuse as good as this for not doing the housework :D

I have also found that her otherwise-out-of-use-basinette is a good play pen, and I just drive DD and a few toys in it around the house with me to whatever room I'm in (complete with broomm, broomm noises!) and DD is usually happy to play if I'm still in sight. Until she gets tired, of course, in which case she usually likes me to entertain her.

But sometimes they just need cuddles at this age, and being there for them at this age is one of the best ways to make them secure in themselves as they grow up.

Hang in there, and there will be a gradually increasing light at the end of the tunnel :hugs:

[Smurfette]

Thanks for all your replies :hugs: . I try so hard to be there for Liv and always have, I feel I am a very responsive Mummy because I really want her to always know I am there for her. I guess when I can't be holding her, like when I am making dinner or going to the toilet for example, I don't want her getting upset as its really out of my control. There are JUST some things I can't do while I'm holding her. I am just scared sometimes she will grow up without confidence, but like you have said, it is just a phase and she will grow out of it.
Having said all of that, I just love my cuddles sooooooooooo much, I'm more grateful she loves giving them then I am anxious about her grizzling.