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View Full Version : My birthing journey c/sec - vbac - c/sec - hba2c! Part 3, C/sec of Oskar



becca74
08-09-2006, 18:58
I got pregnant with Oskar only a couple of months before we moved from the UK to Australia, I never bothered with starting up any ante-natal care before we left, felt it just wasnt worth it. I still didnt bother booking in straight away when i got to Australia - I felt good, it was still early, and I didnt feel like anything needed monitoring.......

I'd grazed when pushing my vbac boy out, DS2, and I'd found the experience torturous and humiliating - and I wanted to make sure that never happened again. So, I set about trying to find out how to avoid tears and grazes, and found some great articles online about this. In doing so, I started to read few birth stories about how some women have fantastic births....this got my curiosity going.....:detective:

Joined the library and perused the childbirth section. What an eye-opener. I checked-out Grantley ****-Read's 'Child birth without fear' as well as a book about waterbirths.

talk about lightbulbs going off! :idea: Everything that Mr ****-Read wrote was so amazing and rang so true. Wow! Women having easy births.....I thought about the births I'd had - with a bit of tweaking, maybe I could have an easier birth too, as well as an intact perinium next time! I photo-copied a tonne of stuff from his book, and returned it to the library.

I then checked-out books by Michel Odent, Sheila Kitzinger and others.....got a good book about being/having a doula.....I was a woman obsessed with planning an amazing birth!

My mum was regularly ear-bashed on the phone about all these amazing things I was reading, and she passed on my new-found obsession to my step-dad. He had lived in a community with a midwife when he was a raving hippie - and she had written a book about birth.....he thought I should check it out! Look up 'Ena May Gasgoigne' he said (I know it's not spelt that way, but I just wrote what I thought I'd heard!) Anyway, after trial and error, I looked up his hippy commune on the web, and through 'The Farm' website, I discovered Ina May Gaskin.

I ordered her books from amazon in the US, and waited......

Homebirth, and particularly water-birth looked really attractive to me, from what I'd been reading so far, but I knew my DH wouldnt pay for it, since it was soooooo expensive at the time, and there was no massive baby bonus back then.

So, at about 16 weeks pregnant, I finally booked in at the hospital. I was planning another vaginal birth, and had never had issues or resistance with my vbac in the UK, so made my first error, and didnt check out the hospitals caesarean rate. I didnt realise the absolutely shocking attitude that Australia has to vbac, and the shocking caesarean rate Australia has, so in my naivety, I just assumed all things would go to plan. My biggest worry was that they would try to hinder all the 'natural' things I wanted for my birth - not that they would try to find an excuse to give me another c/section!

Because of my c/section with DS1, the hospy had wanted me to only see obstetricians. But I argued that I had already had a vbac, so begged them to put me on the midwifery programme. They relented, and signed me onto it. A few of the midwives were really happy to have someone like me, as they too held similar beliefs. In particular there was this male-midwife who got really excited by my birth plans - I really wished that he would be rostered on when I went into labour. The good midwives there gave me great advice - such as wait at home for as long as possible before going into hospital in labour. But then there were the useless midwives, who frowned over my birth plan, and doubted much of what I wanted could happen. They were very nervous about my previous c/section. I just hoped that none of them would attend me in labour - especially 'A', the one I disliked the most. I had left one my clinic appts with her and burst into tears, she was so negative towards me.

My pregnancy continued, and I finally got my Ina May books: 'Spiritual Midwifery' and 'Ina May's guide to childbirth'. well, I underlined, I made notes......I was so very filled with confidence! I ran past my husband the possibility of hiring a doula, but he couldnt comprehend the necessity. He was totally disinterested in these types of things. Ina May became my Mentor! I was a woman obsessed with childbirth!

Anyway, I was in pre-labour for about 4 weeks up to the birth. I'd had my bag packed really early to ensure that what happened with DS2's birth didnt happen again! There were many times I wondered if it was really starting, but to no avail. My due date came and nothing.....until the next morning. contractions seemed just that little bit more sharper, but still, I didnt want to get my hopes up. But my DH hung about just in case - since for the past 2, he hadnt believed me, and I hadnt cried wolf before. The contractions became stronger by lunch time, and I was craving maccaroni cheese - so had a huge portion of this. after lunch, things started to slow down, and I got a bit upset. I was exhausted from pre-labouring over the past weeks. I didnt know how much more I could take of it. so I had a bit of a cry and a lie down, and DH kept the boys downstairs whilst I gathered myself together. After an hour break between contractions, they started up again, this time really making me need to stop and breath thru them. I told DH, and we thought we'd go out and buy some last minute supplies for the boys, who we were leaving with their older cousin, and some videos for them to watch when I was away in hospital. Contractions were every 7-10 mins, but I persisted walking around the supermarket....had one at the check-out till, the check-out bloke talking to me whilst I was peaking with it - I dont think he had the foggiest idea he was talking to a woman in labour!

Went back home, things still totally tolerable, and DH left me alone to labour upstairs. I put lavender oil in my burner, put on my Seal cd, and jumped in the shower.....this was lovely......stayed there for ages. Came out and moaned, swayed and sang.....moved round the room, circled my hips round in contractions....this was all so powerful. My DS1 came up to visit me. I had a contraction, and he asked 'does it really hurt mummy?'....I replied 'no, it's just really powerful and strong - it's all good'. He smiled at me, gave me a hug and I kissed him, and he happily went downstairs.

contractions started to be around 3-5 mins apart, so I told DH we should go to the hospital, whilst i still had enough time between contractions to kiss the kids goodbye. goodbyes done, we got in the car, and I rang my grandma to tell her we were off to the hospital.....it was only 15 mins away.

The labour ward was full when we arrived (tho they had been pre-warned about me). and it was also shift-change (I wish they'd told me the change-over times, I would have come a little later!) We were put in the exam room, and the midwife was shocked (and we were excited) to find I was 7-8 cms.....she freaked and went out to see which labour room would be made free first - she was worried I was going to end up delivering in the exam room.

I had refused a bung on my birth plan, and stood by this. I had wanted to refuse monitoring, but they had a monitor that could be used whilst I laboured in water - so stooopidly I agreed to this. seemed like a compromise. After about half an hour, I was moved into a room with a birthing pool. So far so good....maybe my birth plans would be realised.....

to be continued - I have a bubs screaming for me;)

Lisa&Davey
27-09-2006, 16:05
I hope you get a chance to finish your birth story soon Becca. I've been waiting on the edge of my seat for 3 weeks..... You sure do know how to write a cliff hanger.:yes:

becca74
21-03-2007, 15:00
Okay, Oskar's birthstory is done....if you click on the link in my sig below, it will take you there. (All the birthstories are in the same thingie, if that makes sense)

It's quite long....so grab a cuppa and make sure the kids are entertained/asleep :laughing:

ps, let me know if there is any trouble with the link.....

tru
27-03-2007, 20:14
Wow Becca. I don't know where to start. I've never experienced such a variety of emotions from reading any other birth story. In the beginning I felt so excited for you aiming for such a wonderful birth, and then so sad that you were let down so unnecessarily. You experienced something I was so fearful of - having medical staff who didn't respect my wishes or have faith in acheiving a natural birth. Can't believe you were offered gas so many times! The way you were treated is inexcusable. Im so proud of you for overcoming it all and sharing what you've learnt with us. You're a very strong woman :hugs:

Thank you and well done!

becca74
28-03-2007, 00:43
Thank you Tru.....:hugs:

my_lot
28-03-2007, 07:30
becca- you were my inspiration.

without your wealth of knowledge i would not have entertained the idea of a vbac.

i would not have questioned the drs who were so quick to assume id have an elective c-sect.

i have my vbac 7 weeks ago..and it was fantastic.

thankyou for all the time you put into your posts in bubhub..

3SPUNKRATZ
28-03-2007, 13:36
becca,

where to start..... with the fact that i am crying my eyes out right now. i had a traumatic experience when my son was born and i have been terrified of falling pregnant again. my hubby and i are trying for no.2 and i hope each day that i fall pregnant but am terrified of it at the same time. reading your stories has given me so much hope that things can and will be better next time.
you truly are an inspirational woman. i wish i could hug you right now. i cannot express how amazing you are to me. i am no longer scared to have another baby, i look forward to the experience.

my hats off, standing ovation to such an amazing woman, a body of strength and an inspiration where i thought there could be none.

i highly reccomend to anyone who has not read beccas story to do so.

hugs and kisses to you and your amazing family.

jessica.
xoxo

Lisa&Davey
28-03-2007, 16:01
You truly are an amazing woman. Thank you so much for having the courage to share your stories.:hugs:

becca74
29-03-2007, 02:15
thank you my_lot, Jessica and Lisa...I am humbled by what you have written.....:hugs:

nats
30-03-2007, 20:43
Thank you sooo much for sharing your stories with us :hugs:
It has occured to me what an awfully long time it would have been for you between dealing with the trauma of Oscar's birth until the healing of Noah's wonderful home birth.

Because you have shared your stories I feel I have closure with James' c/s and I can exhale!

Thanks, you're an inspiration :yes:

becca74
31-03-2007, 00:45
Thank you Natalie :hugs: