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Izy
12-12-2010, 14:30
It's not fair that today is Xavier birthday, and he's getting messages of love and happiness, but my other babies are not.

It's not fair that they never got to meet the world.

It's not fair that I never got to meet them.

It's not fair that they could never learn and grow with us.

It's not fair that I'm stealing moments while Xavier sleeps to try to say goodbye.

I've written each of my three angel babies a letter this afternoon. I started out just writing one for Phil and Chook, but that really began a starting point so that I could find my emotions. I've written a letter to Chook. He's my representation of hope and inspiration. He took all the things he couldn't do because of the circumstance and said stuff it. He grew when they said he couldn't. He developed when they said he couldn't. He even started to grow a nervous system/brain network. My stubborn little miracle child.

I wrote a letter to Phil. He is generous and giving. He did everything he could for his brother. He even pumped his own heart twice as much to support Chooks dreams. He worked so hard and yet grew perfectly himself. He's my generous little angel. Looking out for those he cared for. He even waited till mummy and daddy were watching before he let go so that I could see that he wasn't in pain. He just slipped away silently into happy dreams.

And Andy,
My first little boy. The big brother. The strong and independent child to came to my womb when he was ready regardless of anything else. My unbeleivable little fighter who does his own thing on his own timetable. He had a battle with my body that he just couldn't win, but I can imagine him still brave and proud and independant as ever. Kind of, 'well I lost that one. So what's the next one' attitude.

To all my babies I love you so much.

I am so glad for the angel my friend gave me while TTC. That angel watched over me, and now that I've written all my emotions down for my babies, she's looking after their letters too.

I don't know when I'll be ready to do a goodbye ceremony for them. I do plan on getting helium balloons and attaching the letters to them and saying goodbye, but I know I'm not ready for that yet.

One step at a time. My angel can look after the letters for my babies until I'm ready to send them to the winds and the heavens.

She can look after them while I give whats left of my heart to my perfect little boy here on earth. My amazing man who shares his birthday with two of his brothers, and who has kindly slept while mummy let herself be a blubbering mess, finally, after just over three years since Andy left my body, and two years to the day since Phil and Chook left my body.

niks28
12-12-2010, 14:36
:hugs: you are such an awesome mum!

~BEXTER~
12-12-2010, 14:38
have no idea what you are going through, but just wanted to give you some :hugs::hugs:

Kittylou
12-12-2010, 14:42
:hugs::hugs: Izy, I'm in tears reading that, just beautiful.

I went to my son's end of year school concert the other day and, while watching him and all the other children on stage perform with such joy while my DD danced happily beside me, I sat there wiping away the tears at how damn unfair it is that my precious DS2 will never get to do anything like that or experience that joy.

ComeBackKid
12-12-2010, 14:43
:hugs::hugs::hugs:

Couldn't read and run but I have no words. :cuddle:

Mischief
12-12-2010, 14:46
You are so brave and inspirational. Your little babies are all so lucky to have you, and Im so sorry that you never got to hold of all of them in your arms as you do Xavier.

They will always be in your heart, part of your soul. Part of what makes you such an amazing mother to Xavier, and a beautiful person to everyone else.

Thinking of you today Izy. :hugs:

Rest in Peace - Andy, Phil and Chook. Never forgotten. :hugs:
Happy birthday Xavier, a promise fulfilled and cherished with love.

bundmum
12-12-2010, 14:55
:crying::hugs:

Eco Goddess
12-12-2010, 14:59
My heart aches for you right now Iz:hugs:

It feels like only yesterday I was following the journey of your precious Phil & Chook and I know what a rollercoaster it was for you and I'm sure it always will be. The heartbreak you feel when losing a baby never goes away and I think that taking time to remember your precious bubbas (as you have done today) is so important.

I can only imagine how hard it is to share this day between beautiful X and his birthday and the memory of your loved ones. Just remember, they are watching over their little brother:cuddle:

ForeverMine
12-12-2010, 15:06
Thinking of you today Izy.

My heart aches for the journey we've (along with others) traveled. Just want to wrap you up in cotton wool and squeeze you!

Writing letter's is the best thing. I released some balloons for a friends little one not long ago, and man it was refreshing.

Massive huge hugs to you today. (and everyday!)

Izy
13-12-2010, 05:19
i just wanted to thank you all so much! Your support helped me and i feel much better today.

I really didn't allow myself long before i tried to change my mindset back to x, afterall it was his b-day too, but i think it was long enough to take on massive step in healing

Mischief
13-12-2010, 06:48
:hugs: Im glad you got the time to focus on ALL your babies. Its important sweetheart, to allow yourself that time to remember and to grieve. :hugs:

Hokey Pokey
30-12-2010, 11:31
Hi Izy,

I don't have any words but wanted to let you know I read your post and am thinking of you xx

V8
04-01-2011, 15:26
Those letters truly were beautiful Izy, what lucky little angels they are to have such love and to be watching over their little brother X. Much love to you sweetheart :hugs: :hugs: