View Full Version : Anyone else's child skipped a grade in school?
I was wondering if anyone has a child who has skipped a whole grade in school and how this has worked for them?
My niece has skipped two grades and is still coming top of her grade, in spite of being 2 years younger than all the other students in her grade. The only downside is that I think socially, she feels a little isolated.
As smart as she is, unfortunately she has also become a brat. Sounds terrible, to say that about my own niece I know!! But sadly it's true. She is an only child and totally indulged by both her parents. She is used to having 100% of her parents time and attention, and at family gatherings she becomes very demanding and insolent when other family members spend time with her cousins or pay them any attention.
I love my niece (so I feel a bit guilty even writing this!!) and I try and connect with her, but she knows she is a gifted child and it's like she contrives to put down other children, as she knows she can outsmart them.
I am curious to know if anyone else's children have experienced similar?
** bump **
Tangarine Mummy Machine
I skipped a grade at school and also did 3 yr 12 subjects before i got to that level. I started uni at 16.
I dont think it turned me into a spoit brat. I think your neice is a spoilt brat because everyone keeps telling her how smart she is and giving her everything she wants. I don't think it has to do with her being smart.
My daughter skipped over her 4yo kindy year to go into prep, but is still likely to be quite some way ahead of the other Year 1 kids next year ... but she is at the beginning of that journey so I can't really say how it will turn out long term.
As to your niece being a brat, I'd say there might be a number of possibilities. 1. She is more comfortable in adult company, but hasn't got all of the social skills yet. 2. She is bored stiff at being treated like a young child, when intellectually she is not. 3. She has a number of 'intensities' that are part and parcel of giftedness that others don't understand, and find it hard to appreciate.
And maybe, just maybe 4. Her parents need to invest some more time into teaching her manners and social skills.
My DD1 has fabulous manners - when they serve her purpose. She is a social butterfly - when she feels like it. She is also rude, domineering, exceedingly full on, and very loud. Very bright kids will see through the usual platitudes and reasons they need to play nice, and won't behave just because they are told to do so. They need to have good reasons to do so.
Just like adults, really ....
We haven't skipped, and probably wouldn't if we could avoid it if offered, but YES to the attitude. DS is notorious for playing the superior card and we have had to do a lot of work to get him to pull it back and respect the abilities of other people - explaining he's 'unusual' in a way so he cannot expect others to keep up all the time - especially when they are younger than him, and not understanding one of his concepts does not mean DD is stupid, or slow, or unintelligent - it just means she's almost 2 years younger and about on par with her age group - which is FINE.
I have always pulled him up on it though and don't let him play the ner ner I'm smartest game with others. He does however have very little tolerance for people not on his intellectual level, but instead of being a brat about it he tends to keep to himself if around kids who frustrate him, so we always make sure he has something to keep himself busy in situations like that.
edited to add - it's really immature but whenever I get proven right and he gets proven wrong inside I do a little 'ner ner' :laughing: because he is of course, smarter than us grown ups too :rolleyes:
It all depends on how you discuss your child's giftedness with them. I skipped a year and never acted superior to anyone.
My DD hasn't skipped yet, (she's only in kindy) but she is gifted. We have lots of chats about the fact it's ok and normal for her to be proud of her achievements. But to be modest and not to make others feel bad. She is at least 10 levels above her peers in her home reading but we have talked about her keeping that fact mainly to herself. I have told her she knows she's special, DH and I know, and her teacher most certainly knows. She has nothing to prove.
So I think if extremely bright children are raised believing they are better than everyone else they will act that way :yes:
DD1 skipped grades at primary, but it took much of a toll on her social learnings.
we switched her to another school and put her back in the correct grade for her and the school gave her extension work within the class.
At high school now she is working one grade above in maths and science but stays with her age appropriate class for the remainder.
It was (and still is sometimes) a hard thing to have her understand that it doesn't make her better than anyone else just because she picks up things quickly.
Unfortunately she still gets bored in her classes. Ideally she would be somewhere that she could work self paced. In reality she does the class work and then reads for the rest of the lesson.
It is no easy thing to try to adjust when you don't actually fit in.
I was 1 of the youngest in my year and the teacher's suggested I skip a grade but I asked my parents not to make me as I didn't like the kids in the next grade up. I'm pleased that I didn't move up as finishing school at 17 was not easy. I moved to the city upon finishing HSC & could not go out drinking or socialising (looking young didn't help either) and always did feel much younger than my classmates.
If your child's school offers an accelerated learning program for highly academically achieving children then that gives them the best of both worlds: they get to hang out with their age-appropriate peers but still get stimulated academically. I went through 1 of these and was really grateful because when I went to secondary school (where there were a lot more 'intelligent' children) I was still right up there, but there were a lot more up there joining me so competition was tougher and I was able to handle it.
My DD3 is very intelligent and misses out starting her year by 13 days, but although I know she'd be stimulated by starting early, thankfully she's given me an out by regressing a little in her toileting.:o Will do lots of Reading Eggs with her in the meanwhile.
In regards to your niece, I think her parents need to put their feet down about her behaviour. That being said, it's probably easier said than done and I know it's hard to stand by and watch when it's someone else's child and you just want to scream "what are you doing?!?". ;)
I, personally, skipped Grade 1. I came home from one of the very early days in the year and when Mum asked me about my day I told her something along the lines of "look at the junk they've given me to read!" because I deemed it to be beneath me! I caused trouble in class because I was bored when I finished my work and everyone else was still going. I believe that if they're going to skip a grade, it's much better to do it when they're young and kids are more open to other children, as they get older they get far more judgemental and less accepting of others. I was fine at my first school but I was tormented when I switched schools in Grade 5 because I was younger than everyone else. :(
My brother started school a year early because he was smart and ended up being a pretty bad move for him. My mum regrets it very much. He was younger than everyone else and he wasn't able to fit in which ended in him getting bullied most of his school years. Very sad coz noone really new the extent of it. He's 30 now and fine but still can't talk about his school years.
I was skipped two years in school (not at once) and never was told I was ahead, I am quite tall, socially I didn't cope, but physically I blended in and it definitely helped me retain an interest in my classes I think.
As for your niece. Superiority complex. My nephew is a gifted child and is a total brat to his older brothers and his teacher.
The cure? Some time around other gifted children might make her understand she's not 'all that', other than that, she probably needs to learn some humility.
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