Selfish?? Babies over plans..

[NOAHBAY]

Hi guys,

I'm only 25 and want to take our son oversea's next year.

But my overwhelming urge to have another is in my way..

Will I resent my 2nd for not allowing us to go if we do decide to have another?

Am I selfish in not providing a sibling for my son??

What if we take ds and have another one and they feel left out not having gone to disneyworld ect.

So confused?? :confused:

[trishalishous]

personally we are waiting till we have all our kids before doing a major trip (around another 8 years).

[MsMummy]

If your son is 2, then any holiday is for your benefit, so just ask what you want more: another child or a holiday?

if you're really keen on the holiday, then go with one child as it would be easier.

If you really want the other baby, then you might just have to defer the holiday a bit.

There's no right answer; it's just what you prefer.

Not sure about the merits of an only child versus having siblings. I had a sibling, and I loathed him.:laughing: But other people will say different things. i would never conceive a child though for that reason - I think it needs to be something you want and can handle.

[NOAHBAY]

Thank you,

I definitely want more children but timing is the issue.

I feel like everything is starting to flow a bit better now that I'm back at work, and I don't know how putting a pg into that will impact us??

So confused, thanks for your thoughts.

[MsMummy]

Yeah, my son is 2, and I work and my partner is about to finish uni, so everything is sort of settling down and sometimes I think that it would be so disruptive to have another baby.

Although I had the first one because I was a little bored :D so no doubt that feeling will strike again.

I'm sure you'll just suddenly have an urge that it's the "right" time.

[Aaliyahsmummy]

We are planning on a trip in either 2011 or 2012, so dd will be around 1 (planning on traveling before her second birthday)

Trip is totally for our benefit, and we want to travel then before dd is too old or before we have more kids.

We will take our kids to the us/europe when the youngest is 8-10 as well.

[CazHazKidz]

Obviously the decision is ultimately yours, and all we can do is tell you what we would do in your position!

If it were me, I would have another baby first :yes:

Good luck with your decision! :hugs:

[RedPanda]

I missed an overseas trip because I got pregnant. I can honestly say that not one single moment have I ever, ever regretted it. The trip will always be there. I never think what might have been because if I'd gone, I'd not have him. Maybe I'd have a different child, but not him, and he's a treasure! You'll know what you want more.

[Refresh]

I would definitely have the baby first :)

We have been overseas with young children and had a great time. You could just put your trip off for one year if yo are worried.

[TinyLittleTootsies]

MsMummy :laughing: that is the funniest reason I have heard someone say why they had their first baby... I bet you aren't bored now right?:laughing:

I would put off the overseas trip until you have completed your family and they are old enough to have fun/remember it. If you were going to a place for yourselves (ie second honeymoon etc) I would say go now, but you said you are going to disneyworld? Your two year old would have a lot more fun at least over 5 I think. Plus if you have two and go when the younger one is 5 you would have more money to do more right? AND because they are older you could make use of a hotel Nanny in one of your destinations etc. Also a flight that long would be easier when they are older becasue you could explain why they have to sit in their seat and watch the movie and not want to cry and want to walk all over the plane! Lol this is just my opinion anyway because we decided the same thing.. waiting until our kids are older then going :)

[sooz77]

We had to cancel our honeymoon to Vietnam because I pregnant (we were supposed to go 6 months after the wedding so I would have been 5 months gone and not in the mood for rickety trains and unfamiliar food) and not once have I regretted it.

Vietnam will still be there when she's older, although DH & I do joke that she owes us a holiday in Vietnam and we're expecting it for our 25th wedding anniversary. :laughing:

The decision is ultimitely yours, it just depends on which urge is stronger...the urge to travel or the urge to have a baby.