I am sad...

[misho]

I know this isn't the right place for this, and that I dont post on here often enough anymore so I feel kind of strange writing this, but I need to tell someone because I've been told not to tell anyone that I know..

My dad got diagnosed with bowel cancer today :(

Im so sad. Im so so so so sad.

Im sad for him. Im sad for my mum. Im sad for my sister and I'm sad for me and my DS.

My dad just held my DS for about an hour today just looking at him, and I can tell he's wondering if my boy will ever get to know his granddad, if he'll be around long enough to watch him grow up.

He doesnt want any of our friends to know so I just really needed to tell anyone.. someone.

I guess if anyone has any positive stories about family or friends beating cancer I could really do with a good news story right now.

Thanks for listening xx

[JJAZ]

I am so very sorry to hear that!!! :hugs::hugs::hugs:

[naebie]

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
DP's grandad beat bowel cancer about 12 years ago, and I think, if they could treat it so well back then, imagine how much further the medical field has advanced since then!

My dad has cancer, and I think the thing that has made all the difference to him is having family around as much as possible, helping each other out as much as possible. He has been able to see that even if it doesn't work out well for him, we will get through it all as a family

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[whitgal]

So sorry to hear that :hugs::hugs::hugs:

My mum is battling cancer at the moment so i know exactly how you feel.

[SalTheGal]

Oh Sweetie, huge hugs to you :hugs: :hugs:

I don't have any cancer stories... just wanted to send you loads of hugs.

Hope you are looking after yourself, think positive thoughts.... you Dad sounds like he is surrounded by love.

[Sugarplum2809]

:hugs::hugs:
I know how you feel it is such a hard thing to hear that someone you love dearly has cancer.

I lost such a close uncle 3 years ago to lung cancer, it was so hard seeing him change before our eyes.

On the other hand my grandmothers sister beat bowel cancer, they did have to cut a piece of it. She is thin as a rake today.

[misho]

Thanks ladies.

I am taking comfort in the fact that my dad takes very good care of himself, walking every day for gees, I reckon at least 20 years.
He watches what he eats to a certain extent so I'm hoping that that will help him.

However he isn't the world's best patient (which male is???). I dont think he understands whats going on and I know he isn't a positive thinker.. so we as a family will have to change that.

I can't imagine him being sick. I think he's had 1 cold in about 5 years. It scares me to think of what lies ahead in terms of treatment. Just have to wait to see what the specialst says on tuesday.

Watching RPA now and they're actually showing a bowel cancer story so gonna go watch that now..

Thanks again everyone:)

[SpecialPatrolGroup]

:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:Of course you're sad, it is such a scary and confronting time for any family. Even though he is not a big positive thinker, just try to remind him to focus on seeing your little one get bigger!

Is he having surgery?

[beancounter]

My Dad was diagnosed with bowel cancer at 46, but beat it and lived till 81. It is one of the better cancers to have - he had surgery and didnt even have to have chemo or radiotherapy. Good luck to you and your father.

[bondbaby]

This is weird. I was just watching RPA and saw the segment on bowl cancer too. I had to switch it off because its all too close to home for us right now aswell. I know exactly how you feel and what your going through. My dearest mother in law is currently going through her 3rd bout of cancer. For so many years she has wanted grandchildren. She now has two grand daughters 5 weeks apart from each other and she could'nt be happier. Her only fear is much like your fear. That she wont be around to watch them grow up.
The only thing i can say right now is for the whole family to come together and be strong for your dad. Tell him you love him every single day. Talk about 'real' things together like emotions, feelings, fear, hope, love, gratefullness, thankfulness,,,the list goes on. Talking and being honest about what is happening is really important. Dont shut out reality. A really great step to dealing with this is to encourage him to research and seek alternate therapies alongside what his doctor has planned for his treatment. Ive seen first hand how empowering it can be to watch someone get excited about a new therapy out there and how positive they become about how they are facing this horrible disease head on!
I wish your dad, you and your family all the very best. Your not alone with your sadness. Try and stay positive. You need to remain hopeful that there will be a good outcome. XX

[moozle]

:hugs: Miracles happen every day. A lot of it has to do with how positive the patient is and how much positive support they get. It's not an easy time but do what you can to keep his spirits up. Easier said than done, I know :hugs:

[angusmummy]

So sorry to hear the awful news :hugs:

My cousin (who has always been like an older sister to me) was recently diagnosed with bowel cancer as well. It was such a shock, she is only 29.

BIG BIG hugs for you and your family, :goodvibes::goodvibes::goodvibes:

[misho]

This is weird. I was just watching RPA and saw the segment on bowl cancer too. I had to switch it off because its all too close to home for us right now aswell. I know exactly how you feel and what your going through. My dearest mother in law is currently going through her 3rd bout of cancer. For so many years she has wanted grandchildren. She now has two grand daughters 5 weeks apart from each other and she could'nt be happier. Her only fear is much like your fear. That she wont be around to watch them grow up.
The only thing i can say right now is for the whole family to come together and be strong for your dad. Tell him you love him every single day. Talk about 'real' things together like emotions, feelings, fear, hope, love, gratefullness, thankfulness,,,the list goes on. Talking and being honest about what is happening is really important. Dont shut out reality. A really great step to dealing with this is to encourage him to research and seek alternate therapies alongside what his doctor has planned for his treatment. Ive seen first hand how empowering it can be to watch someone get excited about a new therapy out there and how positive they become about how they are facing this horrible disease head on!
I wish your dad, you and your family all the very best. Your not alone with your sadness. Try and stay positive. You need to remain hopeful that there will be a good outcome. XX

Thanks for that bondbaby. Yes I will be taking him to my naturopath in the next few weeks. He has his first appointment with the specialist (not sure if its the oncologist or just a gastroenterologist) on tuesday, and once they say what needs to be done, I will take him to my guy too.. I figure it can only help.
I just called mum and she was watching the RPA story too.. hopefully that will give us all a bit of confidence that Dad can beat it too.

Domsgirl, I assume he will have surgery. Not sure if they'll give him a shot of chemo too though.. I hope its not necessary but what ever it takes...

Im a bit (read alot) spiritual and can read into things alot.. Maybe the RPA story was meant to come on tonight to give us a bit of hope, that our family can have a successful outcome.

To all you lovely ladies who have replied and have someone ill in your family, I hope and pray that your loved ones get better too :hugs:

[misho]

My dad was diagnosed with bowel
cancer 7 years ago. It was nasty, they told him to put his affairs in order. Surgery was brutal, but did not need a bag. Chemo made him feel very unwell, but no weight or hair loss. For a year or so he would not venture too far from a loo. A few months post treatment would never know he had
even had it. Since Then he gave me away at my wedding, He is as fit as he ever
was, just did a 3 month tour of europe, he has met his new granddaughter and will be around to meet the new grandson. I never really think of him as a cancer survivor. He was just really sick for a few months many years ago now.
Good luck to you and your family.

Thats a lovely story. Thank you for sharing it with me :)
Hope your dad continues to do well

[sweetsugardumplin']

:hugs: :hugs: I am sorry babe.

I was diagnosed with breast cancer last year, and it was very hard for my family and friends and in someways more difficult than for me, I believe...........because all they could do was watch, and worry, some prayed, others cried but many felt helpless..........meanwhile I was heading off to have surgery, and then chemo and then radiation, so at least I was doing soemthing about it!

But for me sharing my journey was the most important thing of all, I remember posting on BubHub asking members to keep their fingers crossed while I waited for my biopsy results. And from the very beginning I knew I had to move forward and get through this. I had a twelve month old baby and a five year old, I had a lot of mummying to do.

I don't know if keeping cancer a secret is healthy to be honest, it almost becomes like something that is shameful and should be hidden........but ultimately it is up to your father.

Support your dad, don't expect him to be positive, like everyone he will have days when he feels low and sad, p!ssed off and angry, and then he may show some wicked humour about the most absurd things. I remember cracking jokes about being bald and spotty and my pants falling down, as a result of the chemo....I think the drugs I was on also helped maintain a sense of humour :rolleyes:

Hang in there babe, look after yourself so you can look after your dad. And give him my best!


Take care :hugs: :hugs:

[Mischief]

My advice, dont wait a few weeks to get to the natropath, go TOMORROW. :)

Mum beat bowel cancer, she's 4 years cancer free. It was touch and go for a while, and it was only because a previous surgery got infected that they FOUND THE CANCER.

Get to the natropath, there are some great things. Im only a PM away if you have any questions or need to talk. I know my mum would be happy to talk to you or your dad. Dad had bladder cancer 17 years ago. Drs pretty much gave him up for dead, mum got him to gain weight while he was on the waiting list. :)

He's 85 now and going well for his age! LOL