In need of advice... please.

[ilovechocolate]

I need help. I feel like I am going crazy. I am 29 and married to a wonderful man. Together we have 2 gorgeous boys 6 and 4.5 years. I have severe endometreosis and was told at 23 that I had very little change of falling pregnant. We had three attempts of Artificial Insemination that failed and eventually I fell pregnant (on our honeymoon) and then fell pregnant 8 months later with our second son. I chose to give up work and become a full time mum. My youngest son is starting school next year and I want another baby more then anything! but.. I am scared stiff.. I am worrying over every little thing, like not going to work next year like I planned, what my parents are going to say if we have another one. I feel that because it was so difficult to have my babies and that they really were miracles that I am pushing my luck and it is kind of wrong for me wanting a third when there are so many parents out there struggling to fall pregnant with their first. I am really stuck. Can anyone offer me some kind of advice. Thank you.

[MrsTiggyWinkle]

I would say two things to you.
1. The decision you will make effects you, your DH and your two children. Try not to worry about what others think, or whether you 'deserve' it or not. Your family, your choice. You need to consider others you love, of course, but at the end of the day your immediate family (you, DH and kids I mean) will be most greatly impacted, IMO.

2. Do you think your anxiety could be a symptom of your endo or other hormonal problem? I also have/had severe endo and am currently looking for a diagnosis of PCOS, and i have been having a LOT of emotional symptoms. And they have been a lot worse since my two pgs, which incidentally were also close together. Are you anxious only about this or also about other things in your day-to-day life?

Sorry, i don't know if that is any help, its just two thoughts that struck me when reading your post.

And incidentally i was also told I would have great difficulty falling pg, my chances were "not zero", gee thanks for your sympathetic appraisal there :rolleyes: And we fell TWICE... naturally. Just shows what the doctors know eh? :D

[Georgias Mummy]

GO FOR IT !!!

Go for it with an open mind that it may not happen and maybe it will. Don't worry about everyone else what they think I know it hard but what do you want ? Thats what counts. I would also consider can you afford to be home another year and all of that sort of stuff if you can then I say go for it ..

I too am a very anxious person..

[MrsTiggyWinkle]

So maybe this issue with #3 is the focus of your anxiety, rather than the cause of it, if that makes sense?

I have had these emotional issues since dd1 was born, and I have put off talknig to a a gp or gynae because I thought they would laugh and think i was a nutcase. I went to a naturopath instead and have learned a lot about myself and why I am feeling like this (hormones and diet basically, we think I have PCOS), and I now have the confidence to go see a gynae. Friday this week to be exact :yelclap: And if he doesn't take me seriously, I will find another one.

[ilovechocolate]

I have always been anxious, I have no idea if it is linked to my endo but it makes sense that it is because it has gotten worse since having children.

It was hard in the beginning with having 2 17 months apart and I got depressed in the beginning. I always knew I wanted three but it's only now that it feels like the right time.

Thank you for your replies. I find it really hard not to worry about what others think. I have always worried too much.

[ilovechocolate]

That makes complete sense and I think you are right! A visit to a naturopath would be wonderful for me I think. I did see one a couple of years ago and did not think of that. I really do think that would help. I'm seeing my gyno because I think I need another laproscopy done :(

[MrsTiggyWinkle]

Oh good, I hope you are feeling better soon. I found the naturopath wonderful, mine has 45 min consultations, and i can call her any time I have questions, I don't have to wait for an appointment. I told her all this crazy stuff going on in my head, she was quiet quiet quiet, and i got all embarrassed. I asked her if she thought i was crazy and she said "Nooooooo, I'm just trying to think how I can help you". Well i just cried, it was such a relief. I also went to a chiro which helped for a while but I have 100% definitely had the most success with diet and naturopathy. She's just wonderful :goodvibes:

[ilovechocolate]

She sounds wonderful! Where about's is she? I'm on the Central Coast. Thanks again :)

[trishalishous]

I say if your DH is onboard, go for it!
I'm another who was told that I'd never have kids and I fell naturally with twins!
we are trying again when DD is 6months, hoping to trick my body :)

[MrsTiggyWinkle]

She sounds wonderful! Where about's is she? I'm on the Central Coast. Thanks again :)
sorry, melbourne!

[justcallmemum]

If you and your DH are both wanting another one then go for it and don't worry about other people. Unless they are going to raise it, they got no say in it!
You should see peoples faces when the find out that this is my sixth child. :laughing: