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View Full Version : Err... you do realising you're generalising me too... right?



SassyMummy
08-10-2010, 19:58
Ah MIL... you know when generalise about single mothers/people who don't drive... you're talking about me too, right?

I might not be a single mother anymore... but I was.

I'm not a *****. I don't want to scam the government and keep popping out kids. I didn't trick any man into impregnating me. I am not like the "single mothers" you seem to talk about a lot.

...

She does this ALL THE TIME. She'll generalise everyone, and say it TO me as if I'll go, "Yep, yep, of course!" and agree... but does she forget that she's just talking about ME too? Of course if this is mentioned I'll get a, "Oh, not you... the rest of them."

Yeah... because I'm the ONLY good "one" out there. All the "rest of them," are ferals. :rolleyes:

The other day, she was telling me about some woman who locked her keys in the car. MIL told me that if she hadn't been busy, she'd have gone over to the bus stop to ask one of the people waiting for a bus to help... suggesting that all people who take public transport know how to break into cars! WTF?

I don't drive. I'm learning, but god knows how long that will take, and how long before I get a car. I wouldn't have the slightest clue as to how to break into a car. It insulted me to hear her say that.

She also seems to think I share her bigotted views.

Apparently ALL Asian women who marry white men are gold-diggers. Even the woman who married my father. She doesn't know either my father or his wife very well, but his wife seems lovely to me. She doesn't seem like some horrible b*tch out to steal Dad's money (he doesn't have heaps anyway... lol).

And that gay couple expecting several babies (4 or 5, I can't remember). She told me about it then added, "I don't agree with it, of course."

I'm not a bigot. In fact, I'm probably one of the most un-biggotted people she knows, so why say this? And why assume such things about single parents and those who don't drive? I am not the ONLY person who fits these categories, or have at one point, who isn't some horrible scam-artist. How can she not see that I am not the exception?

What makes this worse, is that she had her first baby at 16 - surely, after becomming a mother so young, she knows that sometimes stereotypes are just a load of garbage? SURELY she knows that?

God she irritates me sometimes... but then others, she is lovely.

Luckily I am a white Australian though, or I fear she may not be so nice to me... :hair:

naebie
08-10-2010, 20:10
GMiL does this all the time as well. For her, I think it just comes down to her generation, but it is still a little off putting. For example she makes racist remarks about "black fellas" knowing full well I have Aboriginal heritage :rolleyes: She even made a racist remark about DD's nose when she was born :no:

I give GMiL the benefit of the doubt, and just assume she isn't doing it intentionally, but it still upsets me at times. She often speaks without thinking on all sorts of topics, such as saying that DP's cousins are so smart for not having children yet so they can get their careers and own homes sorted... then say something along the lines of "Oh, but we love M, and wouldn't want it any other way" :hair:

Amara
08-10-2010, 20:25
Generalisations are interesting aren't they? My mum was telling me the other day that young women are just not what they used to be in her day. They ALL wear revealing clothing and they are ALL having sex at a young age and throwing themselves at men.

When I tried to point out that back in her day there were lots of babies adopted out by single mum's so clearly there were young women having sex out of wedlock she said that was very unusual, it hardly ever happened. Two of my cousins were born out of wedlock so clearly two out of 3 of her sisters did not wait til marriage yet she still thinks this way. It was hippy days for goodness sake. Lots of free love going on. Selective memory I think.

Myztiks#1Fan
08-10-2010, 21:21
i must be the same as you stacey :rolleyes:, well obviously not one of th 'good' ones like you lol

brogeybear
08-10-2010, 21:25
This sort of thing gets up my nose too. I have always been forthcoming with my opinions though so when faced with stupid comments like that I just say it how it is straight back, lol. After a while most of them get the point and don't bother with the ageist, sexist, racist, ist, ist, ist comments to me anymore, lol!

just her chameleon
08-10-2010, 21:32
OMG :eek: That is so sad she has those opinions of people :no:

Boobycino
08-10-2010, 21:42
I loled at the people who catch public transport know how to break into cars.

Two things : If I knew how to break into a car why would I be catching the bus :laughing:

And how would I drive said car once I busted into it ;)

Hehe

Oh yeah and she sounds really dumb.

I lurve my mil patting herself on the back because most people wouldn't be okay with an Aussie girlfriend for her son.... Errmm that's lovely but I'm no longer just some Australian girl you've do graciously accepted into your life I'm the mother of your grandchild... Ya do realize your grandchild is Australian yeah? Also funny that comment came just after bil got serious with an Aussie girl. Ah funny... That makes all three! Big shock hey. You come to Australia to make and raise a family and all three children wind up involved with Australians :eek:

:laughing:

Aaliyahsmummy
08-10-2010, 21:56
Sleepless beauty I always read your posts and laugh about how simular my inlaws are to yours, my mil still bags out white people to me and expects me to agree...um lady, I'm as white as they come! Haha

I think alot of older people are set in thier ways and just assume we think/ feel the same as them, even if they are just crazy!

Miss_N
08-10-2010, 21:57
SleeplessBeauty - some people must think that you can only pair up with your own "breed"! If I had a dollar for the number of times I have been asked of DF is South African I would be rich!

I feel like yelling "No! I live it Australia, Df is Australian and NEWS FLASH!!! SO AM I!!!" Haha!!!

Stacey - maybe you should hit back at her with your own generalizations! Like "oh you've got to love the older generation, you know the ones born in the *insert year/s she was born in*, who always have something to complain about" Lol!

Boobycino
08-10-2010, 22:00
Hehe yeah... Breed...

Oh I love that idea 'not like back in 'the old days where:

Where newborn babies were taken off their unwed mothers without their mothers conscent - some never to be seen again.

Where using a belt was an acceptable way to punish a child.

Where aspestos was used as a building material ;)

Errrmmmmm something about thalidomide being given to pregnant woman to help them sleep.........

Yeah....

Gosh people from your time were really stupid - oh but not you

brogeybear
08-10-2010, 23:26
Love the last two posts Miss_N and Chel! Thats gold!

RileysMama
09-10-2010, 09:43
Haha, we hear the comments about babies born to unmarried couples and how its a terrible "situation"... oops, looks like we're in that situation! How will we ever cope?!

Some people are just stupid... is there a cure for that yet?